As you like it...

Bollywood round-up: 2005

2005-12-31T22:42:00.000+06:00

The awards IMHO should go as follows:

Movie of the year - Hazaaron Khwaishein Aisi

Best actor - Shreyas Talpade (Iqbal)

Best actress - Chitrangada Singh (HKA)

Best supporting actor - Naseerudin Shah (Iqbal) and Nana Patekar (Bluffmaster)

Best supporting actress - Shweta Prasad (Iqbal)

Best director - Sudhir Mishra (HKA)

Best music director - Shankar Ehsaan Loy (Bunty aur Babli)

Best male singer - Sonu Nigam (Dheere Jhalna, Chup Chupke, Soona Man Ka Aaangan)

Best female singer - Shreya Ghoshal (Piya Bole, Agar Tum Mil)

Best cinematographer - Ravi K Chandran (Paheli)

Critics award

Best actor - Shiney Ahuja and KK Menon (HKA)

Best actress - Konkana Sen Sharma (Page 3)

Best director - Amol Palekar (Paheli)

Just a few more personally sponsored awards:

Torture of the year: Mangal Pandey

Could-i-get-on-ur-nerves more performance of the year: Mallika Sherawat in Bachke Rehne re baba and Arjun Rampal in Ek Ajnabee

Whats-in-a-name movie of the year: Padmashree Laloo Prasad Yadav - its rumored that Laloo really wanted to make the movie tax free and even advised schools to take the young students to an excursion for this movie as he had a guest role but thankfuly better sense prevailed in the end.

"So-we-are-supposed-to-actually-act?" couple of the year: Zayed Khan and Aishwarya Rai in Shabd

Movies to watch out in 2006

# Kabhi Alvida Na Kehna - just curious to see how more downhill can KJ go ?

# Rang De Basanti - Rakesh Mehra's next after that promising but enigmatic opener Aks

# Fanaah - Kashmir, Aamir and trying to guess 'inspirations' should make this one a fun watch

# Munnabhai meets Mahatma - will the sequel be as good as the original ?

# Sanjay Leela Bhansali's next whether it is Bajirao Mastani or Saawariya

Jungle Masti@Bhimeshwari

2005-11-15T11:59:00.000+06:00

November 10th - An outbound trip - a mad gang of 15 - a day in the wilderness - river rafting and trekking - sleeping in hammocks listening to birds chirping - total masti

Can life get better than this ? Check out snaps below

The events of the day

Flora and Fauna

Sights for sore eyes

Loghuts and Lunch

The Hammock Heros

Main, Meri Patni Aur Woh

2005-10-16T12:20:00.000+06:00

HE - Mithilesh Shukla
AGE: Wrong side of the thirties
HEIGHT: 157 cms
FEATURES: sadly nondescript
In short, just another face in the multitude

SHE - Veena
AGE: that magical 30 - not a day more, not a day less
HEIGHT: 165 cms
FEATURES: Strikingly simple yet enchanting
To sum up, the woman of every man's dream

So what happens when HE meets SHE, of course in the presence of a million relatives? Obviously there is no physical chemistry and quite clearly this is not LOVE-AT-FIRST-SIGHT...but still there is magic...

What happens next is that HE marries SHE and they settle down to a life of marital bliss till HE starts having these trips of guilt whether he really deserves her only for the film to end on a happy note.

What to look out for:
The brilliant Rajpal Yadav who elevates every single frame he appears in to dizzy heights

Well etched performances by Rituparna Sengupta and Kay Kay Menon and commendable support from all the supporting cast

An enjoyable first half punctuated by a witty screenplay and delightful dialogues (not to forget Naseerudin Shah's miss-not voice over)

A light hearted family entertainer

What is missing:
Pace in the second half

Verdict:
If you've had enough of watching

a. wannabe entertainers taking you through sight seeing trips of Down Under under the guise of making a comment on serious societal trends (OR)

b. lewd comedies with tonnes of skinshow

then MMPAW is just about what the doctor ordered for you. Two Thumbs up to Chandan Arora and MMPAW.

A promise is a promise...

2005-10-08T15:01:00.000+06:00

..and once its made, it just should not be broken...DEFINITELY NOT....

But what happens when two promises happen to intersect in such a weird way that to honor one would mean breaking another....yeah...life is too complicated,isn't it...Anyway since the decision to stop blogging was only a promise made to myself, I guess I can safely dump that for the time being and honor the promise made to VS.

After all, if one has had his yahoo mail acct hacked and password changed, and then does not remember anything of the data enetered 8 years back starting from the B'day, the time zone selected, the alternate email id given, the reminder question and still manages to get the account reactivated again thanks to a brilliant buddy, one does have to pay the price for it...Life sure was hell without YM :-)

So here we go... VS, Lou u da and thanks for all the help...I will try and keep my end of the bargain...

1 YEAR, 1 MONTH, 1 WEEK, 1 DAY later.....

2005-06-28T18:44:00.000+06:00

"Friends applaud, the comedy is over."

- Ludwig Van Beethoven (1770-1827)

Geometric progression, late hours and mad ol' me

2005-06-27T21:26:00.000+06:00

16 mails from ONE person that I have still not replied to..

8 books vying for my attention
J D Salinger - Catcher in the Rye (presently re-reading)
David Davidar - The House of Blue Mangoes
Robert James Waller - The Bridges of Madison County (half way done)
Terry Pratchett - Truckers (staring at me from across my cubicle)
E M Forster - Howard's End
Toni Morrison - Jazz (now in Japan)
Lance Armstrong - Its not about the bike: My journey back to life
Chetan Bhagat - Five Point Someone

4 movies saved on my laptop that have still not seen Windows Media Player
Cinderella Man
THGTTG
Khamosh Paani
An affair to remember

2 weeks till the parachute comes back

1 more stupid post that makes no sense to anyone but me...hopefully...

:-(

I need a breakkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk desperately.....

Why I loved Paheli....

2005-06-27T17:30:00.000+06:00

Paheli is a poem about passion, pain and longing.
Paheli is a painting where every pixel on the canvas is filled with resplendent colours.
Paheli is as much about thoughts as it is about words and deeds.
Paheli is art at its best.

Before I get on with it, a big round of appluase is due to....
the producer Shah Rukh Khan for believing in the story with all his heart and putting his money to back his heart

But yeah, I really wish....
SRK the superstar had not interfered in the decision to finally convince SRK the producer to cast SRK the actor in the pivotal role of the husband and ghost. Not that the King Khan is really bad in his portrayal but well, the role could have been performed equally well by a lesser known name and thereby not deflected attention from the central character of the female protagonist. However, I think there is a reasonably good case for giving SRK the producer the benefit of doubt for I am sure he cast SRK the superstar with all honest intentions since none can deny that his very presence is bound to pull in more crowds and that is something that a good movie like Paheli deserves for it forebodes a very promising future for genuinely hatke ventures like this. Besides, there is also the small matter of recovering the Rs 20 odd crores invested, you see.

Based on Vijaydan Detha's classic novel Duvidha, Paheli is the story of Lachchi, a woman abandoned (in the pursuit of business) by her husband Kishen on her wedding night with the union yet to be consummated. Unknown to anyone, a ghost falls in love with Lachchi and fills the vacuum in her heart (and life) by taking on Kishen's form whilst duping the world by passing off as her husband all the time hoping and dreading the day when Kishen will return home after his trip. Life however does not spare this surreal couple of the problems of reality and fate intervenes to set up a showdown between the ghost and the husband with both of them laying claim to Lachchi and her love.

While Paheli can easily be slotted into the so-convenient genre of fantasy films, the real reason why it works is because it is an immensely engaging emotional saga of a woman and the choices she faces in life: of becoming a subservient daughter-in-law waiting for her turn for happiness or a passionate woman embracing love even if its from unacceptable sources. Scenes depicting the angst of unrequitted love, the volanic outburst of pent up emotions upon discovering a solace and the small pleasures of everyday life are so wonderfully depicted that you cannot but sing enough praises of the screenplay and narrative.

Playing the playful ghost, SRK is absolutely in his elements except for the odd moment when his 'Rahul act' raises its ugly hood but its in the dull husband role of Kishen that SRK falters by hamming excessively. Anupam Kher as the money minded father of Kishen adds yet another feather to his well adorned cap whilst Dilip Prabhavalkar as the drunk uncle of Kishen and Rajpal Yadav as the village messenger offer comic relief. Lending admirable support to all these actors are two wonderfully etched cameos by Amitabh Bachchan playing an eccentric shepherd who is finally called to solve the Paheli (riddle) and Juhi Chawla who plays the other daughter-in-law with such consummate ease and dignity that you forget that she is actually a star. If I have one complaint about the charctersiations in Paheli, then it is the fact that Juhi's charcater could have had much more impact if only it had been fleshed out a little more but then its a 13 reel movie and I must admit that I am being a little finicky. Yeah, I have reserved the best for the last. Rani Mukherjee delivers what is for me the performance of a lifetime, one that is subtler and therefore more difficult than her role in Black and one that is sure to fecth her all possible awards and accolades.

Ravi K Chandran..What does one say about his role in the movie...When rediff mentioned that 'Paheli is the best-looking Indian film in a very long time', I was half scared that every frame would look like a picture post card and realism would take a beating. Suffice to say that Ravi's camerawork is mindblowing, be it capturing the scenic beauty of Rajasthan or the colorful gagra cholis, without being excessively opulent on the eye a la Devdas and credit must also be given in part to Muneesh Sappal's art direction. Music by MM Kreem is one of the real high points of the movie and I could write pages just on Gulzar's Dheere Jalna. Finally, the real hero of the movie is the director Amol Palekar for having the guts to dream of recreating the magic of the book on celluloid and actually succeeding in it. After directing art house classics like Kairee and Anaahat, Amol sucessfully transcends into the commercial realm and does a brilliant job of treating the uncoventional and bold theme with liberal doses of cinematic entertainment. Kudos !

Final verdict: Must see - Go watch it in a movie hall.

I am de best

2005-06-27T14:04:00.000+06:00

To be the smartest cop in the beat needs one to think exactly like the smartest criminal in the vicinity and more importantly, think two steps ahead.

Hey don't google....thats my own quote... So can I please gloat / showboat ? Pleaseeeeeeeeeee.

A couple of days back, I got to read this really interesting post in one of my friend's blog about how he'd 'Got lucky' and would be able to lay his hands on an e-copy of HP6 on the 18th of July. Never one to easily believe such stories (Ok ok, I was plain jealous that he was more resourceful than me) I did some quiet investigation and uncovered one of the biggest and cleverest scams in cyber space. It was all dead simple. The blog, by his own admission, was 'private' and read by only us, his close friends, so credibility for the average reader was never an issue. (Who doesn't like to believe that its only he/she who is getting this great deal?) Besides all he had asked us was to give him email ids (only personal ids) to which he would supposedly send us an e-copy so that we had a little bit of protection from any possible anti-piracy action in the future - ids so secret that not many in the world knew they existed. (Of course, don't we all have such ids jes to escape from scam and read our 'valuable mails' in privacy) And so in 48 hours, he had almost 36 comments in his post with email ids including those of our friends ka friends who did not want to lose out on a steal besides half a dozen doubting Thomases who did not comment in public but instead sent their mail id to his email account. So what happened next ?

Just like the recent BPO scam, my dear friend sent an email to all these people threatening to not only sell all these email ids to e-marketeers but also to send a mail on July 18th revealing the suspense in the plot of HP6 unless....yeah, the ransom...all the people contributed Rs 20 towards his fund for buying the book in hard copy. Of course I am sure you would have been tempted to indignantly dismiss him and his threat but then you don't know him. So almost 28 people paid up and with Rs 560 in hand and only Rs 60 (the price he prides himself of never exceeding for any book) to put in from his own side, my dear friend has pre-booked HP6 from Indiatimes. So was I one of the bakras ? You've got to be a kidding. I can smell a scam a mile away and when one knows him as well as I do, I would be suspicious even if he offered to let me take his latest hotttttt Punju girlfriend (season's flavour..hahaha) out on a date. TRUST. My foot :-)

Anyway, considering I uncovered his fancy scheme, why am I revealing it here ? Coz in return for my silence I asked to be the first to read the book after him (note: AFTER HIM..I AM considerate) but since he scoffed at my 'suggesttion' and offered to 'consider' it, I havta show him I mean business.

Dude, here's an offer you cannot refuse. Give me the book or my next step would be to reveal your URL and let the whole world know about you :-) Yeah, I am a mean bastard and yeahhhhhh, I do drive a hard bargain.

deep sigh

2005-06-24T14:13:00.000+06:00

Well-behaved women

seldom make history

I always thought I was in love with her but now I KNOW.
Someone please help !!!!!

:-(((((((((((((((((((((((((

A family post: Gen Next

2005-06-24T11:57:00.000+06:00

Watching TV these days plunges me into seemingly bottomless pits of depression. And the worst part is I am talking not of the soaps in Sun or Raj but of ESPN. Yeah, you heard me right and I am referring specifically to the Spelling Bees competition that recently concluded in the US. While it is one thing that I do not like the fact that such events have now become mass
carnivals televised live to global audiences which means kids go through so much of tension and anxiety but on the other hand, it amazes me that the kids of 'this generation' seem to be soooooo bloody smart. To be perfectly honest, this year's competition was really tough considering I knew only 30% of all the words that were mentioned leave alone their spellings...and yeah, though I am a former SB champ (cudn't resist gloating on the SOLE highpoint of my childhood exploits) I have to stand up and doff my hat to Anurag Kashyap and co:....

Enough of rambling...what all this meant was that I was forced to sit back and think about our own family and the kiddies in it - the cousins (I have way too many in all directions but the ones I am closest to belong to my maternal grandma's side and they are the ones in question here) who belonged to the same generation as I did.....don't you dare smirk..and then I realised it wasn't fair on them since I am actually stuck between two generations - as old as my mom's youngest cousin and waaaaaay older than the latest arrival in our family - but allowing for such cheap pleasures, I've gotta admit that we've all turned out really well and I can't but help admiring all of us, including the best of the lot which is ME :-)

Now where do I start ? Okie, closest home is Chennai so I'll start with my second cousins, The sisters Rajagopal...or thats how I love calling them...The elder one, Lavanya, who I think is now in her final (Third??) yr of engineering comes across to me as someone who is extremely strong-willed and I am sure she will soon fly down to do her MS in the US and god only knows the peaks she is then gonna scale. The younger one, Sowmya, has just finished her std: 12 and is all set to join the Engineering brigade. In a lot of ways she is similar to her elder sis in that she is also unassuming yet warm but she is also dissimilar since she is more introverted and arguably the quietest of the entire lot. The best thing about The Sisters Rajagopal is that together they are the best singing pair in the entire family. Having been trained in Carnatic Music for almost 5-6 years now, the two are soon to be spoken of in the same breath as the Soolamangalam or Bombay sisters. My only grouse against them is that they are too much into classical and spiritual stuff and I really wish they would use their super talents to perform the odd cinematic number, like say Vaseegara, to please stupid cousins like me ;-)

Next are the other second cousins, the Sethuraman sisters but somehow calling them that way does not sound right...Sorry Chithappa :-) The elder one, Vardhini, now studying at ICFAI Hyderabad, is the most adorable sister one can ever have. Shy to the point of being reclusive, it takes her a month to think of a reply to my "Thanks for the raakhi. What do you want as a
gift ?" with a "Anything anna". However it would be stupid to mistake her gentle ways and make false assumptions because she is again a very resolute character with a mind of her own, one that knows what it wants and will work towards attaining them without being distracted. Janani, her younger sis now done with her Std 10, seems an out and out amma-gondu and is definitely more outgoing than her sis or atleast its the case with me. Janani is the only cousin I've seen grow up dramatically from a real baby to a cute teenager. It surely did not help that their family stayed in Calcutta and the only time I saw them was for 2 hours in a Railways station everytime they left after their annual vacations to the South but then to emphasise how much I adore these two, if there is one kid I want my own girl to turn out like, then it has to be Janani :-) Together Vardhini and Janani are probably the only people who make me feel miserable that I do not have siblings but then this feeling lasts just two weeks around Raksha Bandhan time so I guess I must confess that I am grateful for being the only child who gets to eat all the 'pandigai palagaram' made at home...well, make that 'almost' all the food...

A little farther up in the eastern part of India at a godforsaken place called Haldia are my two first cousins, Abhishek and Nandini. Abhishek, now in his Std 4, owes me one for giving him his identity - I decided on his name. That apart, there isn't anything that comes remotely close to connecting us. He is turning out to be everything I wished I had been but never was - left handed (hehe..I know I am crazy), very intelligent even at this age but more of the smart than the academic types (and that means second rank..will someone pls tell todays kids its ok to be second), awesome with computers - and hopefully will not get stereotyped into the engineer / doctor route and will become someone BIG in his chosen field. I won't waste more words on my ammanji since all that is reserved for his sister Nandini, all of 18 months who is, without any doubt, my princess. I have seen a lot of kids in these 27 years but none that can holler as much as her....and none that looked cuter when they holler...So cute that I am so tempted to kidnap her and bring her to Bangalore except that everyone in my family knows exactly where to look in case she ever went missing :-( Did i forget to mention that she can play golf ? Yeah !!!

Miles apart in a suburb in London stays my other second cousin Thejes. At the ripe old age of 8, Thejes is an avid F1-fan, supports India in every cricket match against Pakistan, is the resident Derek O' Brien of the family and if other people are to be believed, is the cousin who comes closest to who I was when I was young (read: chamathu, well behaved, academically inclined though with terrible eating habits). As if all that wasn't enough, he is also into Classical music and I just hope he becomes an Unnikrishnan and not a Balamurali Krishna...These days there is more dabbu in cinema than kutcheris...which brings us to the conclusion of my family's Gen Next...wait...how could I forget 2 month old Shreyas...Its still early days but if he has inherited the right combination from the gene pool, then we have yet another perfectly raised, super bright kid who will become a national rankholder in the near future...Baaah...Aren't we all scuh boring, stereotyped Tam Brahms ? I really wish one of my cousins would do something different - marry an Armenian or become a pop star or something whacky like it...

*sigh*

The Championship has begun

2005-06-21T14:55:00.000+06:00

The Official site

The Live Blog

The favorites

From Neone but A-Rod, its now Go Safin Go !!!

And who cares which of the lassies win as long as we get to see some really cute girls !!

Yaar Indha ANNIYAN ?

2005-06-18T13:15:00.000+06:00

Dear Mr. Shankar,

Hello. How do you do ? Now that we are done with the needless pleasantries, let me get straight to the point. I sent you a letter 22 months back and I would have assumed that you had the good sense to read it. Unfortunately it does not appear so but here I am penning another...Why ? Because as a loyal card holding member of the gullible watch-Thamizh-movies-in-halls public, I feel disappointed and even cheated. Yes. I am talking AFTER I have seen your so-called masterpiece Anniyan. I know there was no gun put to my head but still, considering I paid through my nose to watch it on the First Day, I defintiely deserved better.

For starters, let me give the devil, that's you, its due. Anniyan is probably not your worst effort and that honour without any reservation belongs to your earlier venture, Boys. However gloat not that you have 'improved' since the above statement is as left handed as a compliment can get. I am not denying that Anniyan did not have its moments except that I feel extremely let down that a movie with so much hype riding alongwith it (and do not blame the media alone for this) failed to capitalise and make its mark. On the positive side, I do appreciate your attempts to make movies with a message and also commend the fact that you 'think big' but I also cannot seem to fathom why you grossly underestimate the paying public's ability to realise that style is all good but what works is substance.

As I sat through the 3+ hours of your cinematic fantasy, it was an emotional rollercoaster of a ride and I have tried to capture below whatever I felt in the process...

Vigilante themes with larger than life heroes have always been your trademark formula for success but haven't you heard that old adage which says that when you milk a cow beyond a certain point, you only get blood. Gentleman when it first came out tread new ground and broke existing mental barriers about right and wrong. Indian and Mudhalvan took slightly different routes but collectively shattered the myth that one man cannot make a difference in society. However one did get the feeling at the end of the third film that we had seen it all. (Not to mention other directors attempting similar themes - Samurai, Desiya Geetham being other lesser successful movies of the same genre) To have a fourth installment in the series of social-revolution flicks and offer nothing new is a crime and reeks of a talent succumbing to the necessities of commercial success.

I have always believed that its the story that makes a movie work and when you are backed with a tight, racy screenplay half the battle is won. What I have never understood with you is your almost maniacal obsession to dream in crores. To escape criticism by deflecting the blame on the paying public saying that it is we who expect nothing but big ventures from Shankar is balderdash. To add to this is the almost hypocritical stance of giving your assistant Balaji Sakthivel just 1.5 crores to make Kaadhal your first home production. And trust me, he did a much better job considering his movie was author backed and not clinging onto visual gimmicks. I would be a fool if I were to deny the fact that the first song in Anniyan picturised in Amsterdam was a visual extravaganza but I am yet to comprehend the financials behind such a splash. Are you telling me that you will get X no: of people into your hall just because of this one song ? And add to this is the obscene sum you must have spent to paint the entire village in the last song when the audience has by then completely lost its patience. There is something called as the Law of Dimininshing Marginal Utility in Economics that you would do well to read and grasp.

Considering I am done with my critcism of your movies from a height of 20000 ft above the ground, lets get down to the bare bones.

a. Can you please tell me the reason for the almost comical portrayal of Prakash Raj and why he had to make a real fool of himself using various disguises under the pretense of conducting investigations ? Cinematic liberty is all good but again the pre-climax at Nehru stadium is one of the most howlarious scenes in the entire movie. My sympathies lie firmly with the Police Department.

b. Can you please throw some light on the needless use of graphics in most of your films, more so in this one to depict the so-called hell ? Can you, by any remote possibility, justify the investment in CGI considering each second costs Rs 3 lacs and they do not add real value to the story ?

c. I am definitely not being CASTEIST or CLANNISH but is there any specific reason why you seem to love picking on the Iyer and Iyengar community for all your protagonists ? And even if you insist, can you do some REAL research and try to avoid age-old stereotypes vis a vis language and lifestyle. I KNOW you are one of the directors who does a lot of homework and have an acute sense of ground reality but maybe you are unaware that even the Brahmin community has embraced wholeheartedly the change in societal trends. Your depiction of Ambi with a kudumi is akin to saying every Muslim has 6 wives. Pardon me but the intention is not to raise communal sentiments, rather to prove the absurdity of your portrayals.

d. I never knew you were in awe of yourself so much that you needed to have so many pieces of self-reference in your movie. Or wait...Is this a desi homage to Tarantino ? Looking at the clearly 'inspired' martial arts stunt scene (Kill Bill neone), I would think so.

e. MPD as a subject is as beaten to death in movies as reincarnation. Maybe not in Kollywood but for Christs sake, we live in the age of the Internet so do not insult the intelligence of the audience with your lengthy science discourses and your over-simplistic rationale for such behavior (I almost thought you'd get Nasser to produce Sidney Sheldon in court as proof). And considering so many of your scenes were 'inspired' you might have as well copied Primal Fear straight - atleast it was more logical and realistic there.

f. He who comes from hell is not afraid of hot ashes ! Now wth is that ? It sounds so much like those stupid taglines from the Arjun stable.

g. On the flip side, yes, I have to confess that you have a pulse of the audience and can make us relate to ordinary, every day incidents in a way that no one else has managed to and the flashbacks in all your movies especially in this one pack some real punch but can you please also rein in on the sermonising part of the dialogues. I have tremendous respect for you and Sujata but why do I always get the feeling that you say one word too much.

h. Technically the film rides high on the some impressive camerawork by your team of Ravivarman and Manikandan and the stunts by Peter Heynes are awesome but re-recording by Harris Jeyaraj is loud and editing lacks sharpness since the film could easily do away with 15 minutes. Lyrics are nonsensical, music is average and choreography is below par with the much touted Remo Remo number nowhere a patch on God's Yakkai Thiri. On the acting front, Sada sleepwalks through her role, Nedumudi Venu is efficient (not as good as his Indian portrayal), Prakash Raj is passable and Vikram is good but nothing great. Vivek's comedy is a real highlight of the movie and many a scene gets that much needed uplift thanks to his impeccable timing.

I know you are sitting at your home basking in the praise being showered whilst your producer is busy raking in the moolah thanks to the phenomenal opening that the movie has got but Anniyan will not become a landmark movie in the chapters of Thamizh cinema. For that to happen what is needed is a little bit of magic, something that can be best explained by one small incident which happened in the movie hall where I saw it...Towards the climax when Vikram's MPD is explained, someone in the audience broke into an impromptu "LAKALAKALAKALAKALAKALAKALAKALAKALAKA" and the entire hall erupted in cheers followed by noisy hoots of "Chandramukhi padam podu". Doesn't that say it all ?

ps: Maybe that someone was ME ;-)

Movie Meme

2005-06-17T11:23:00.000+06:00

Its the home stretch so without throwing any tantrums, here is yet another feeble attempt from my side to reward a loyal reader of the blog by playing along with another of this stupid tagging business...I saw something similar @ Pri's a couple of days back but then memes seem to travel faster than light/sound so here I go...This time its on movies and so havta confess that it wasn't as cumbersome as the others...

I guess the answers to the first two questions below are known since I write my short weekly movie reviews so I am answering those two based on future possibilities

The last movie I borrowed:
A Very Long Engagement (will rent it out pretty soon considering I have been hearing so many good things abt this flick)

The last film I watched in the theatre:
Anniyan (will watch it tonite)

Which five fictional characters in Hollywood have you had a crush on, in pecking order?
Kate Beckinsale as Sara Thomas in Serendipity...I'd give an entire lifetime to spend the rest of the 6 (its totally 7 right ?) with her...
Meg Ryan as Kathleen Kelly in You've Got Mail...I always dream of aging with her reading me books at our parlor

and the rest of the three follow a mile or so behind but still...

Audrey Tautou as Amélie Poulain in Amélie (pls note: the apostrophe over the E)...quintessential quirky do-gooder...I love such mad women...
Meg Ryan as Sally Albright in When Harry met Sally...Need I say anything ?
Julia Roberts as Anna Scott in Notting Hill..She's terribly flawed but thats the beauty of the character...

Which five fictional characters in B/Kollywood have you had a crush on?
Amala in any goddamn movie, more so as Anjali in Agni Natchathiram...Oru eli, rendu eli.....ooohlala....
Shaila Banu in Bombay played by Manisha Koirala....she looked ethereal and yeah, I was stupid to believe in love at first sight....
Divya in Mouna Ragam played by Revathi...Ditto the reasons for Anna Scott
Gita in Gitanjali / Idhayathai Thirudathe played by Girija...dunno why but I was 10 or 11 and the girl was soooo cute that I fell madly in love with her...I still am ;-)
Jenny in Jogger's Park played by Perizaad Zorabian...strong woman who knows what she wants in life...

(Shucks...4 of my 5 choices are characters created by The God...I bow my head to Thee...)

Five Hollywood films that I watch a lot or that mean a lot to me:
Considering I already have my favorites listed under my blogspot profile, I'll go for others not listed there..

Serendipity (12 times ??)
When Harry met Sally
ET
One Flew Over the Cuckoo's nest
As Good As It Gets

Five K/Bollywood films that I watch a lot or that mean a lot to me:
Again this list is over and above what's already there in the profile...

Saajan
Andaaz Apna Apna
Nayakan
Vedham Pudhidhu
En Uyir Thozhan

Five Hollywood/Bollywood types that I can't stop slurping over
This list will be way too long so let me jes give you the top-of-my-mind recalls

Jolie...The Angelina Jolie (Thisucks, u can go take a walk in the park)
Bridget Moynahan
Kareena Kapoor (drooooooooool)
Sameera Reddy (dusky is IN)
Mallika 'errr-sorry-my-eyes-are-distracted' Sherawat ;-)

Dudes I think have no right to be this cool / hunky:
Brad Pitt
Richard Gere
George Clooney
Nagarjuna
Abhishek 'when-not-clean-shaven' Bachchan

Five H/B/Kollywood people I'm supposed to be impressed by, but am not:
Amitabh Bachchan (Baaaaaaaaaaaah)
Aishwarya Rai (Baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah)
Shah Rukh 'Chimpanzee' Khan
George Lucas (*running for cover*)
Shankar

Five people whom I would like to pass on the torch to:
Anu - Never knew ppl would actually 'want' to be tagged ;-)
G
OK - Yeah, lets hear it again...
Dumbs - Hows that for revenge !!
Ri - NOW you cannot escape :-p

The story of a Tam Brahm - written by a Tam Brahm - for the benefit of Tam Brahms

2005-06-15T17:42:00.000+06:00

Hello $$$$, eppdi irukka ?
Dei ngomma...engada irundha all these days ?
*whispers* I am fine..Just came back from the US last week
I can't hear u loosu...besides ennada orey Petera irukku ?
I am with someone here and she doesn't know Thamizh very well so can we please continue in English
Of course.. So wassup dude ?
The rest of the story later... but this is an emergency...I need you to come to The Forum immedietly...
I just came back from shopping for clothes there....Besides its Saturday evening and it will be terribly crowded dude...Plssssssssssss.....
Its important asshole
Great...so you've brought me oranges from Florida ? Give me 30 mts and I will be there..
It can't wait that long...Its urgent.. grab some clothes, catch an auto and come here soon...and don't ask questions

CLICK

Dei, you've really put on weight...
Later...Later....
Why are you so tense ?
Do not interrrupt. Hear me out. OK ?
Thats sounds so mysterious... All ears now...sollu...
You know my dad, right ? Been after my goat to get married for the last 18 months...well, I could not resist any longer...So as things stand, I am here today as part of the 'ponnu paarthufying' procedure...
WTF...
Sssssssh..not so loud..she's looking at us...
who ? where ?
Don't turn now... there towards the left corner behind the escalator...
Gimme in degrees of the clock, baadu
8 o clock...
Tall, fair lady...Red salwar ? Waittt...haven't I seen her somewhere..and who is the other chick ?
Dunno.. but yes, she is Vandana... remember my Dad's best friend Mohan Uncle.. you've seen him in our house... fat man with a loud laugh...she's his daughter....ennavo jaadagum ellam serndhaachaam.. of course, they say I am under no pressure to agree and I can say Yes only if I like her but u know how this thing works, right... all of them want me to marry her
...so wots ur problem ? If she is cool, agree nuh...
wait... she's a very modern, progressive girl....she wants to have a chat with me..and she has brought along a friend too... so I thought I would also have one for moral support..
why me ?
C'mon you are the God of all such things..Besides you talk so much and get along with everyone so well that even if I get nervous or goof up, you can cover for me...
Sod off mate...
See, there is stuff I need to clarify with her too from my side....she's spent all her life in Delhi and visited Chennai only for her holidays.. so am not sure she knows our kalachaaram well.....and I would like to chk it very casually...and it helps when I can be with someone with whom I am relaxed... and you fit the bill dude... pls...
Kalachaarma ? Appdinna ? Are you crazy ? Besides what makes you think I wont get nervous and screw up.. and I surely don't want to be held responsible if this thing fails coz of sthg stupid I did...How about uncle and Aunty ? They are OK with this thing ?
They suggested you. They seem to think you are mature and sensible.
Shittttttttt..
Lets go.. Just play it by ear, will you..

Hi Vandana, this is the ##### I was telling you about.. We used to call him $$$$ at college
Hi #####...Btw, this is my friend Aarthi...She caught you stealing glances when you were talking with Satish and she wants to ask you something....
*bloody embarassed* Vandanaaaaaaaa...
*embarassed* So Vandana, how do you find Bangalore ?
Its nice and pleasant
and how about Satish ?
*blushing like crazy* Machaan, not fair da
Ha Ha..He's nice and he doesn't have an accent which does say a lot.
Hahahahaha...
So Vandana, you were saying that there were a couple of things that you wanted to clarify..
Yeah...See Satish, I have learnt Classical Music for almost 11 years now and I so dearly want to continue. If at all we get married, I hope you won't mind that.
Of course not
....and there is this car, a Hyundai Accent, that I have gifted my Dad on his 60th Birthday for which I had taken a loan...I am repaying that with my salary and it should be over in another 11 months so if we do get married, I wish to continue that. You have any objections ?
*embarassed* Maybe Aarthi and I will just wander around near Cookie Man... You guys want anything ?
Sit down #####. No need to be embarassed. You will have to go through all this sometime soon.
No objections.
Great. I am done. I am sure you have something to ask of me.
Hmmmm.. no...nothing much...
Come on...Be honest...
Ok... I know this sounds stupid but do you watch movies ?
Yes, I do
....and do you like Shah Rukh Khan ?
No..
Thank God. Coz I hate him.
In fact i can't stand him too.. But seriously was that an eliminating condition ?
*embarassed* Not at all
*smiles* What else ?
I know this sounds horribly sexist but can you cook? I am not saying you should be a housewife and all but honestly I am such a foodie...
He is, trust me
.....and even if you can't cook, if you like good food then it will help...its easier you see.. shucks, this is coming out all wrong...
I understand. and fyi, I cook pretty well.
That is the understatement of the year. She cooks wonderfully well.
Anything else ?
Hmmm...Noo...
I think there is something else...
How did you know ? Am i that predictable ?
*smiles* go ahead
I do hope you don't think I am crazy but since u were brought up in Delhi, I was just wondering if you know how we folks down South celebrate Gokulashtami...do you also draw Krishnar's paadhums all over the house ? and stuff like that....
Fyi, Amma and I wear madisaars...and we draw the kolams..and btw, I can even prepare uppu cheedai and vella cheedai all by myself..
Reallllllllllly ?
Yeah
Oh boyyyyyyyyyyyy
So anything else ?
No
So can we break the good news to our folks ?
*embarassed* are you always so open ?
Arre, kalyanum ellarum pannanum..I am happy its atleast with someone I have heard so much about from my childhood. I am not going to blush or do girly stuff now.
Hahahahahaha
Why are you laughing ?
Your Thamizh is so Delhiish
*feigns a kick* Don't you ever say that again. Why don't you join us for dinner ?
Nopes.. Havta go home..besides I don't want to be kabaab mein haddi ;-)

Thank You Lord for reinforcing my faith in our Tam Brahm tribe. To hell with love marriages if arranged marriages can be so absofreakalutely lovely :-)

Anbukku Naan Adimai...Neenga ?

2005-06-14T10:55:00.000+06:00

Total Number of Books I Own:
This is gonna be a tough one...My private library in Trichy which includes my mom's books and my own collection in Bangalore together must be around 350 books besides which I guess are the ones that I've given away to my ammaanji...Not bad but still way short of my dream...

Last Book I bought:
Playing with Fire by Nasser Hussain...and the loosu to whom I gifted it is yet to return it back to me to read :-(

Last Book I was gifted:
Jazz by Toni Morrison. Thankoo lady :-)

Last Book I read:
Love in the time of Cholera by Gabriel Garcia Marquez (re-reading)
The Bridges of Madison County by Robery James Waller (unfinished)

Five Books that mean a lot to me:
To Kill A Mockingbird - Harper Lee
The Class - Erich Segal
The Godfather - Mario Puzo
All Frederick Forsyth novels

Filling the last slot is always tough...so depending on my mood - whether I am in self-pity, cheerful, contemplative, pseudo-intellectual mode..blah blah blah - it could be be anything from A Tale of Two Cities, The Three Investigators series, Wisden Cricket Almanac, Surely You're joking Mr Feynman, Diaries of Franz Kafka (translated) or any book by Plum.....

Btw, when you said books I took 'em in the classic, literal sense but if I could include comics and fun stuff, then I love Asterix / Archies / C&H.

Yes, No Douglas Adams, Tolkien or Rand pls :-p

Tag five people and have them do this on their blogs:
1across (atleast over email pls)
Seshvenk
Pri
C-K-K
Thisucks (and no, I don't want to see CITR, AS, F, FPS....*evil grin*)

Quik Quik Round-up

2005-06-13T09:26:00.000+06:00

Kung Fu Hustle
Yet another in the long line of action movies that seem to come out from the Far east based on martial arts ? Yeah, to an extent, but where this movie differs from the rest is in its outrageous screenplay. Its wild, its whacky and it definitely needs supsension of belief but the bad guys are so cool, the stunts so astonishing on the eye and the dubbing so horribly funny that the 2 hours are one heckuva joy ride.
3.5/5

Kinsey
2004 was the year of bio-pics in Hollywood and though The Aviator and Finding Neverland won more critical acclaim and awards, IMHO, I think the best effort of the year would undoubtedly have to be Kinsey. Written and directed by Bill Condon, the movie explores the life of Albert Kinsey, the man responsible for single handedly ushering in the sexual revolution of the 50s through his controversial books 'Sexual Behavior In The Human Male' and 'Sexual Behavior in the Human Female'. Though the subject in question is very touchy even in the present times, why the movie scores high in my opinion is in the sensitive way it has been handled with the focus being clearly on exposing the motivations of the man than in sensationalising his ways and methods.
4/5

Arindhum Ariyamalum
Low key banners producing medium budget clean entertainers for family audiences by investing in the talents of new comers rather than established stars is a trend that is fast becoming prevalent in Kollywood. Another trend that is gaining rapid ground is the re-emergence of a well etched out, multilayered villain character(s), started ironically by Prakash Raj in Ghilli who here plays a different kinda baddie in this movie. The strengths of this movie are its simple naration, excellent performances by Arya and Prakash Raj and some cool music by Yuvan Shankar Raja.
3.5/5

D - The Company
Another gangsta saga...Another gritty, racy thriller from RGVs Factory...The movie does not break new ground and is maybe not as good as Satya or probably even Company but is worth a dekho if not for anything but Randeep Hooda (which again reinforces my tremendous respect for Sush). Hooda as Deshu the silent yet menacing baddie delivers what is one of the finely nuanced performances I've seen, one that illustrates that lesser is better. Hooda is one of those guys who is blessed with rugged, unconventional good looks (with that stubble and those shades he is much better than Vivek Oberoi on the eye) and what gives him that extra edge is the fact that he can realy emote when called for. A born-again Chunky Pandey and razor sharp editing which ensures that the runnning time of the movie is less than 2 hrs are added bonuses whilst a jarring background score and some loud caricatures tend to bog the film down. Still worth a dekho.
3.5/5

Bunty Aur Babli
Warning: Leave your brains back home, ignore the lack of logic, come in with minimum expectations and you can have a blast. BaB borrows liberally from a lot of Hollywood movies most notable of which is that memorable flick Bonnie and Clyde and as it happens in most such cases the desi adaptation simply flatters to deceive. Though many of the cons border on the absurd, you cannot but delight at the odd moments of sheer mirth. Though a lot has been written about AB(sr)'s performance being the saving grace in what hard-nosed critics claim is a sorry excuse for a madcap entertainer, I strongly differ. Blame it on the lack of depth in the writing or whatever but AB(Sr)'s Dasrath Singh just does not impress except in a few sequences where he is saved by some really witty lines. The real strength of the movie is the amazing chemistry that Ab baby and Rani share which leads me to believe that we might have the next big star jodi after SRK-Kajol. I am a huge fan of SELs brand of music and anything I say about BaBs music might sound biased but suffice to say that the songs are top-class with a good mix of melody and foot tapping folksy tunes which are brilliantly picturised esp the Chup Chupke number....which brings us to a couple of other things I have to say abt this song..The locales are zimbly awesome and the costumes of both the leads mindblowing...not to mention the sensuous smooch they share to kickstart the song...smackkkk....one of the best I have seen in a looong loooong time. Hindi cinema is indeed coming of age :-)

ps: Someone kill Aishwarya Rai pls
3.5/5

Coming soon:
Mr and Mrs Smith
Batman begins
Parineeta
Anniyan

Meme Time

2005-06-10T15:43:00.000+06:00

There are all kinds of memes floating around in the blogging world - books, movies and what not - and I 'almost' got 'tagged' at a couple of places a week back ('almost' coz none of the really close buggers dared to do it without seeking prior permission and as usual, I would have none of it..muaaaahahahaha...evil laugh) but finally couldn't resist joining this particular bandwagon. Of course, incorrigible me had to flout/modify some rule so pls find below a slight variation of whats floating around in blogosphere....The best part of this meme is that it does not 'necessarily' have to be passed around to everyone and its wickedly naughty.

ps: I have not had the time to ask each and everyone of you listed below permission to add the URL alongwith the name but am still going ahead with the same - however if you have any issues, jes tinkle me ;-)

Before you look under the cut, fill out a numbered list of 20 with people you know from Blogspot/LJ/Rediffblogs in no particular order. If you don't know that many, fill in the gaps with any virtual acquaintances. Then click the cut and answer the questions in a post in your blog/journal.

1. OK
2. Johnny
3. Seshvenk
4. Thisucks (:-P)
5. L&M
6. Sud
7. Ri
8. Pri
9. Anu
10. Negaah
11. Ekta
12. Koncentricity
13. Megs
14. The brat
15. GWBE
16. Susie
17. Zed
18. 1across
19. Viggie
20. Hoodibabaa

1. Is #9 a boy or a girl?
Hahahahahaha...Not very sure...Its a virtual world we met in, you see ;-)

2. Would #11 and #2 make a cute couple?
Its one thing that 11 has actually managed to find a 'bakra' already but if I'd been asked this a year ago, then I'd say that there could not be a better recipe for complete disaster.

3. #18 and #4?
A pig and my sex(y) buddy... wot a combo !!!! roflllllllllllll !!!

4. When was the last time you talked to #12?
Last Monday - yet another missed call that I had to respond to....*smile*

5. What's #6's favourite band?
Rubberband ? Actually methinks its The Beatles...

6. Does #1 have any siblings?
Thankfully no...The world could not have taken another of her kind.

7. Would you ever date #3?
*sigh* If only I were a girl :-(

8. Would you ever date #7?
Hullooo...this meme is 'fixed'..I know that makes no sense but...

9. Is #16 single?
Till July 4th. Right ?

10. What's #15's last name?
Sivaraman at last hear but with her, you can never tell ;-)

11. What's #10's middle name?
Maami ?

12. What's #5's favorite thing to do?
Wooohooo..I love doing this..Where do i start now ?
a. Torturing people with her incessant chatter.
b. Torturing more people with her incessant banter.
I am bored of typing the same thing over and over again so go back to point a.

13. Is #13 hot?
Yeah... considering how sweetly she ticked off that anon blogstalker... wait.. u meant 'hot' as in chilli....red...anger...right ?

14. #14 and #19 make a good couple?
That would be one heckuva riot though I am sure to be killed by someone for even imagining this....so the official answer is NO NO NO

15. What school does #20 go to?
..Make that 'did'...It must have been a nice tiled hut in some obscure village in Tirunelveli

16. Tell me a random fact about #11:
I can't stop with 1...She drools over Fardeen Khan, actually enjoys cricket and is one heckuva pal....pssst: The last thing was my feeble attempt at being nice...

17. And #1:
oh, the GirlFriend...wot can I say abt her ? she's mad but then aren't most of my good buddies like that...

18. And #3:
cracks fundooo jokes that have me absolutely splitting my sides to death...brings us back to q7...*sigh*

19. Where does #9 live?
Chennai

20. How did you meet #17?
Thats a very very long story...but i think it was a cricket match and how I hit him for a huge six... rofllllllllllll....

21. What's #4's favourite colour?
Black. definitely black.

22. Would you make out with #14?
Are you crazy ? She's one third my age and she's my grandchild.

23. #5 and #6 best friends?
Bingo. This meme is definitely fuckin' fixed.

24. Does #7 like #20?
hehehe...I hope the twain never meet ;-)

25. Does #8 like #19?
They would if they knew each other considering they both write really witty stuff...hey wait...when u say LIKE u jes mean like right ?

26. How did you meet #2?
@work...

27. How did you meet #18?
At college and I'm delighted I didn't let my biases interfere with common sense :-)

28. Does #10 have any pets?
I am so tempted to say sthg but then Maami will kill me so lets jes say PASS

29. Random fact about #10?
she writes aaahsum poetry.. arre, I mean it

30. Is #12 older than you?
Hahahahaa...I cna hear her screaming at such a stupid Q...

31. Is #17 the sexiest person alive, or what?
Rofllllllllmao... Yes yes yes... women swoon when they hear his name...

32. Who on the list have you known the longest?
#17

You know something is wrong when you...

2005-06-10T10:58:00.000+06:00

...start typing a post on Day 1 and its about the events of Day 1 and then finish it but don't want to post it.. and it all appears meaningless on Day 2 but still you want sthg to show for the efforts of the previous day and so you decide that you might as well post it since its your damn blog and you are the one setting the rules...So here I go...

Today has been a very strange day so far. For starters, I woke up before the alarm rang which was a first in my new house but maybe it was because there was Argentina vs Brazil on Ten Sports. 40 minutes and two Hernan Crespo goals later, I found myself just in time to catch EC-16N which again was strange considering I was 10 minutes late. Being in no mood to start off a new book, I re-opened GGMs LITTOC and read 30 pages of the lives of Ariza and Urbinal before I realised I was in office. Kicked off the workday with an awesome breakfast with a really dear friend but somehow, even though the canteen offered more eye-candy than usual, my unusually dressed down friend seemed to be the most attractive one around. A few casual compliments and harmless eye flirting happened and then it was time for mails. So many of them considering I had left office really late yesterday night. The official mails all had some 'quality' work (read: no dumb XL and PPT) for me to do - which was really strange considering we were nearing the end of the week (shit happens on Friday, they say) - and the personal ones were the types that made me go *smile*. So far so good.

Ran through the usual dose of 15 odd blogs sipping hot, piping coffee.. Yeah, I have cut it down to 15. Read the comments on my blog and also some really interesting posts at the usual hangouts but links to most of them and a couple of others will follow later in the post. So what do I write about now ? I just don't know. Now that I am this far, I feel very very empty and though I hate fitting into stereotypes, I havta agree that it just struck me that maybe I am one of those typical bloggers who is going through this lifecyle. Of course, the order is all screwed up in my case but yes, I think at some point or the other I have been through all of this except 9

Neway reading all this has kinda made my mind that today will be the day I post sthg on blogs....So here I go...

13 things concerning my blog / other blogs/ bloggers that bug the hell out of me...

Anonymous smart alec commenters who leave no clue as to who they are

Tonnes and tonnes of advertisements

6 digit sitemeters

A right pane with links to 'Blogs I frequent' that is longer than Hanuman's tail

Bloggers who keep crying foul that someone flicked their story light years after they wrote it

Silent readers who will read no matter what you write but will never care to give feedback

"Hey, these Malls have a Malayalam Blogroll, how about a Tamil one" kind of morons - Dude, get a life...Don't bring your parochial sentiments to even this blogging world

Blogs which keep referring back to their old posts in every new post

"Oh, you write so well. Btw, do read my blog too" kind of comments

Blogs that never fail to remind you that you are at a 'best of Indiblogs' location

Condescending posts that teach you how to improve traffic : wth, I hate visitors, how about teaching me how to stop ppl from droppin by

Tracking tools that seem to give away the fact that u silently visit some blogs ;-)

Okie, I don't like this post much now....So let me end it by giving links to some of the 'more interesting' posts I have read offlate

The Compulsive Confessor

The world's best blogger speaks

sat·is·fac·tion

Sidinspeak

....damn, there were lots more but its becoming a pain remembering 'em so wth, go find it out yourself.

The Countdown Begins.....

2005-06-08T14:35:00.000+06:00

This weekend (10/11 June)
Parineeta
Bunty Aur Babli (*fingers crossed*)
Mario Vargas Llosa
Meeting friends
Kapde shopping
Cycling expedition

Next weekend (17/18 June)
Christopher Nolan's Batman Begins
Anniyan
Meeting the 'Chennaiwaasis'
Theatre workshop
Elephant Safari at Bannerghata National Park

Am I dreaming ? Someone pinch me please.

(or rather)

If this is a dream, don't you dare wake me up.

Another quick story :-)

2005-06-07T19:21:00.000+06:00

Friday, October 1, 2004

Persistance pays

I was walking towards the canteen when I saw her passing by on her way back from lunch. Our eyes clashed for a fraction of a second before gazing elsewhere. Summoning up my guts, I turned around, strode quickly and caught up with her.

"Can I ask you out for a cup of coffee ?"
"Yes you can"
"Wowww..that was easy"
"So ask ?"
"Excuse me ?"
"I just gave you permission to ask"
"Fine. Will you have coffee with me ?"
"No. I am busy"

...and she coolly walked away.

The next day I was ambling back from the canteen when our paths crossed near the lawn leading to the Floating learning centre

"Will you have coffee with me ?"
"So the kid has learnt his lesson in English"
"Will you have coffee with me ?"
"Go climb a tree"
*pointing to a tree nearby* "And you promise to give me the answer I want to hear if I ask you the same from up there ?"
*smiles* "Yes"
"Give me a minute"
"No No.. I said Yes to the coffee"

Dad, I'm reading this blog post dated October 1, 2004 but I am not very sure it is a story. The guy in it sounds too much like you
Which one ?
The one where the guy almost climbs a tree to get his gal to agree to go on a date with him
So whats wrong with that ?
Geeez...you guys used to do such creepy stuff to actually jes have coffee...and this woman sure seems to enjoy playing-hard-to-get.
Don't you dare talk about your mom like that !! Now get back to your homework.

These 7 year olds can be such a pain !!

B-Skool Survey time

2005-06-06T12:48:00.000+06:00

Heraclitus once said "There is nothing permanent except change"

BS...as in... Bull shit ! 10 months back, I wrote this. Now don't you follow that link coz I will be repeating some of those points here again - you can do that later in the post after you've read what I have to say in the next few paragraphs. At that time, the core issues facing Indian society as revealed by some of the most talked about surveys conducted by newspapers and magazines were

a. Promiscuity in Bangalore
b. Best workplace in India
c. Sex habits of Chinese women
d. Hottest British male

Cut to the present and in the last two weeks if one were to believe TOI and other magazines the core issues are

a. Date rape and BPOs
b. Best technical institues of India
c. Dress code for women in colleges - havta make special mention here of a Tee I saw recently - If u DARE to BARE, why do you CARE that I STARE ? Aahsum :-)
d. The world's top 10 beautiful women (No Mallika ???? *too shocked to speak*)

So what do you say ? Have things changed much ? Or rather, have things changed at all ? Nay. So why am I here with yet another commentary on the latest Top 10 B-school survey, you may ask ? To which my reply would be "My poor dahlings, simply because every good article becomes a classic only when it is followed by a poorly written sequel which gives people that much needed perspective when judging the initial effort. OK ? Now go and read my old story.

Done ? Great. Read on.

The biggest difference that has been observed in the B-school landscape from the time I did a survey the last time around has been the emergence of brands that seem to have taken 'the retail mall' approach to business education. Just look at ICFAI. They are there everywhere - in every city that sells more than 10000 CAT forms - bringing MBA education to the doorstep and people actually think they are awesome. And in most cases, perception IS reality so maybe they are awesome. I digress. My own survey this year is fool-proof simply because it works on two rules that have withstood the test of time.

Rule 1: Debunk competition and cast aspersions without attracting legal notice

One of the hazards of commissioning a detailed study involving 2 months of data collection using 4 reputed MR agents armed with a 20 lac budget is that of needlessly complicating a simple 2 day affair and that is precisely what the latest BT survey is guilty of. For that matter, my own survey last year used scientific segmentation as a guiding tenet in deciding sample size and was therefore guilty of flouting accepted and established rules of surveying. My humble apologies. This year BT takes it three steps too further by actually segmenting the respondents into classes like recruiters, wannabe MBAs, MBA students, functional heads and young executives. The first few questions that spring to my mind are

1. Who are these young executives ? Define 'young'. Why do their opinions matter so much that they are a separate class by themselves ?
2. Why are functional heads so important ? If you are gonna interview 5 respondents of this category in each company, the odds are that one of them is an HR head (a function head) and then he/she is gonna plump for XLRI or TISS only. So doesnt such a system give HR specialising B-schools an unfair advantage ? And to add to this, the 'recruiters perspective' is again from the 'head of HR'.
3. The sample size might have been great but looking at the final results, here are my views on the 'quality of the sample'

A scene in a local pub

Guy1: My dad is becoming a real pain in the arse
Guy2: Why ?
Guy1: He wants me to get married
Guy2: Whats wrong with that ?
Guy1: Are you crazy ? I am just 23 and I want to drink and while away more years of my youth
Guy2: So ?
Guy1: I am going to do my MBA. It will give me 2 more years of freedom.
Guy2: So are you preparing hard for CAT ?
Guy1: Are you mad ? I dont want to go to IIMs, someone will steal my girlfriend in my absence. I have to stay in Pune. Give me a name of a mast college here, man !
Guy2; Symbiosis
Guy1: Good, I like that name. That is my first choice.

Wannabe MBAs perspective.

A scene inside a posh Mumbai office

Manager: ....I think B schools in India have evolved. Even the Tier 2 ones are getting better by the day.
Interviewer: So which are the campuses XXX plans to visit this year ?
Manager: The usual...A/B/C and KJ Somaiya
Interviewer: A/B/C ? Wow...How many did you get from these top B schools last year ?
Manager: Actually by the time we finished formulating our policy, placements were almost done Interviewer: So you are telling me there weren't any students left ?
Manager: Not exactly but none from the Dean's top 20
Interviewer: and how about KJ ?
Manager: Oh, that is an awesome college
Interviewer: Really ? Why ?
Manager: Coz we managed to get 5 of the 6 toppers to join us
Interviewer: And were they any good ?
Manager: Of course. The best and the brightest that India has to offer.
Interviewer: So you are an MBA urself right ? Where did you pass out from ?
Manager: Lets have this off the record. I passed out from KJ but trust me, thats got nothing to do with our policy. The students are really good. Besides I don't have to fly to another city to take interviews and I get to spend time with my family. Would you like to have some coffee ?

Recruiters perspective

To read more of Rule 1, check online version.

Rule 2: Expound on the virtues of your rigorous methodology (or the lack of it)

If there is one good thing that an MBA education teaches you (yes I said one and meant one {and yes, its all they teach in 2 yrs for 4 lacs}) then it is to KISS - Keep things short n simple. So bearing that principle firmly in mind, my methodology was to meet arbit people (the fewer the better but still balancing the constraint of having to produce fake bills and claim obscene reimbursements from my sponsor) and catch them off guard with questions that can never be answered with well coached and rehearsed lines taught at Career Forum or IMS. And if you thought, the methodology was simple, then the findings are even better - none of them will be presented in charts and graphs and brand scores and complex parameters which are just tools and opprtunties for fudging. My results will be in a simple ranking based on nos like 1,2 3 to 10. Hows that for simplicity. And last but not the least, I am NOT the wine and dine kind of guy and so my survey and the resultant findings are backed by dollops of honesty that come associated with my fair name.

The results are

1. IIM-A
The name says it all - A stands for adult or men (not being sexist here) or the big league. Without any question, the boss of all B schools.

2. IIM-C
Again the name says it all - See (C), we are up there with the best.

3. IIM-B
Yet again the name says it all. I want to BE (B) there but am not there yet.

4. IIML / XLRI
L rocks coz it offers something different. People who believe A is hot and comunally sensitive, B is too congested and polluted and C is full of Bongs like to study here. And trust me, they seem to be wise folks coz the intellectual capital at L has improved by leaps and bounds in the last couple of years.

The biggest mover in this year's list XL, despite the numerous doomsday predictions, continues to prove its critics wrong. In the last year they have made tremendous strides in improving the quality of their intake (Not to be read as: My girlfriend got in when none of the other B schools accepted her) and made corrections in their course curriculum which now gives them a more professional image than one of a college run by saintly people dressed in robes. Verdict: They live to survive another year.

6. FMS / SP Jain / NITIE / IIFT
The first 3 are all same wine in same old bottle.

Niche is in but not niches like Amity. With India becoming a global superpower, the need of the hour is to have more managers with a global perspective who can give real 'global gyaan' hence the rise in IIFTs stature.

10. IIMI / IIMK

Indore is supposedly one of the fastest growing cities attracting the nouveau rich and the accompanying lifestyle. A B-school in such a place sounds just right.

Kozhikode or Kunnamangalam has the unique distinction of being the only place to feature in three of my Top 10 surveys - Top 10 B-schools, Top 10 holiday spots and Top 10 publicity mongers ;-) So you know what you're getting into.

So there it is, my common sensical survey cum poor man's (yeah, this abridged version is free and the detailed one is only 16$ per online copy) guide to Indian B-schools.

Disclaimer: The views expressed are MY own and in case someone took serious offence, I am prepared to apologise as long as you can produce a receipt indicating that you bought the online version.

The End...or is it The Beginning (Concluding Part)

2005-06-03T10:23:00.000+06:00

Hullo....I thought we were on for tomorrow night but the SMS scared the daylights out of me
How come you are here so quickly ? Hanging around at MG with 'your women' ?
Nopes...I'll tell you later
No No..Its Saturday and you dont usually come here. Tell us who it is ? If not, I am gonna rat on you to your girl
Ufffff... I was with her only machaan...
Ooops. We are sorry...Didn't I tell you not to call him
Its okie Preeti...Ramya is totally chill..Wassup ? Why the sudden SOS Sudhir ?
You're meeting her for the third time, right ? So is she our 'manni' ?
Shut up Sudhir. And Preeti, whats wrong with you ? You look sloshed. Don't tell me you've been drinking all evening
Man....he is actually blushing...
If there is nothing serious here, then maybe I should go back...
I tried calling you yesterday night and the day before and the phoneline is always busy...Looks like you've finally found the one...
WTF...I am leaving...Bye guys...
Please Mahesh
Then tell me whats wrong Preeti ? You look godawful
So do you like Ramya ?
Dammmit..Now you've started it too..Yeah, I like Ramya...Now will someone please tell me whats wrong here
She broke up with Vikram
Whattttttttttttt ? Preeti, is that true ?
Yeah
Godddamn......Why ? What happened ?
Nothing
Sudhir, solli thola da ?
His life is in a mess too
Now what wrong with him ? Why isn't anyone telling me anything ?
Mahesh, relax...
Onnum illa...Supriya is back from UK...
So ? I thought you were over her...Aren't you ?
Hmmm
Dude, get a grip. Move on. Do not hold on to the past
Why don't you listen to him, Mahesh ?
Sorry
She came back and asked if there was a chance that we could possibly see each other
Whattttttttttttt ? No kidding
I swear
Am I misssing something here ? This is the same girl you wooed for months only for her to finally turn you down saying she's been seeing someone steady for 3 years ?
Yeah
So how have things changed now ? She dumped the other guy ?
It seems there never was anyone else
Excuse me ?
Yeah..that was just a story she cooked up to shoo me away
......and why would she do it ? She didn't want to hurt you ?
Illapa...It was never a No...It seems she needed time to think it over
She could have told you that !!
She says keeping me in limbo would have been more torturous
Bullshitttttt...sorry
Hmmmm
So what did you do ?
What am i supposed to do ? I said No...
Oh god...and may I ask why ?
What would you have done if you were in my position ?
Thats an absurd question...Is it ego ?
No
So, do you still care for that girl ?
I don't know. This whole thing is so unsettling. I hate people who lie
I know I know...But if you still care for her the way you did, you should jes forgive her for it...To err is human dude...
Hmmm
..and what are the chances that you will find someone whom you like and more importantly, someone who can actually like a moron like you...zilch....trust me...Your problem is non existent so we'll talk about it later but whats wrong with her ? Why is she so glum ? Preeti, you aren't coming clean with me...
Chuck it nuh
Is Vikram cheating on you ? If so, screw him...He doesnt know how lucky he is to get a girl like you... He doesn't deserve you..
Reallly ?
C'mon, I've known you for donkeys years...Trust me..
Its not him
You ? You like someone else ? Jesus Christ, why isn't anyone telling me anything....Sudhir, surely you know...Who is this guy ? Preeti, is it Raghu ? You want to get back with him ?
No
Then ? Who the hell is this super guy ? Does he atleast know how you feel about him ?
No
You are mad ? Machaan, she left Vikram without even knowing if this other guy would accept her or not ? She is truly mad...I think I'll have a whisky....Hullo....
Maama, I thought u were trying to stay off drinks
You guys are surely not helping...
See, I tried talking her out of this but when I heard her point of view, I am inclined to agree with her
So who the hell is this friggin guy ?
Chuck it nuh
Fine fine. So I am now infringing on your space ? Great. I will shut up
So, when do we get to meet Ramya ?
Dunno
Don't sulk bugger... Shitttt, a very cute chick jes entered... Don't turn now...aaraam se...11 o clock...
Whatever
Sudhir, when are you gonna grow up ?
Who wants to ? Mahesh, here's a dare. 500 bucks if you can get that chick's phone no.
Not intesrested dude..
You chicken, atleast give it a try nuh
Who is this girl ?
The one there in the far left corner with that bespectacled guy
Why that one ?
The guy looks like her boyfriend and you've always made tall claims that you could score goals even when the goalkeeper is around, remember ?
The short girl with those Preity Zinta glasses ? Can we make it a 100 bucks ?
Why ?
She doesn't seem to be my kinds
Ok
Hmmm....Fair enough...jes wait...

Here it is...9880191197...
You must be kidding
Why don't you just call and check ?
Of course I will..Nobody wins a bet that easily...
Ha Ha... On the contrary, a fool and hsi money are easily parted

TUN TA TUN TA TUN TA TUN

shittt..It is her phone no...How on earth did you get it ?
My 100 bucks pls
Here...Now tell me..
Thats Ramya
Bastarddddddddddddddd
Let me just call her over

Ramya, this is the Preeti I've told you about..and this is Sudhir...Guys, this is Ramya
Hi guys..Preeti, its a pleasure meeting you in person after all the anecdotes I've heard about you..
You speak about me ?
Ha Ha Ha...Only nice things...dont worry...
Mahesh, my Dad called...Obviously everyone at home is anxious.. I think we need to leave...
We are sorry we disturbed your evening
Please. No need to apologise.
Preeti, we'll talk tomorrow ok ? Bye guys
Bye Mahesh and sorry Ramya...

I am sorry. I forgot that I was to meet you in 10 minutes.
Mahesh, its ok. Maybe we can have dinner some other time ?
Ooops. I forgot dinner too.
Chill pa
Was just wondering...So we meet some other time ?
Err...I mean...If we have to...or rather, if we want to...
So did uncle ask you about me?
Yes. He did
And what did you tell him ?
I didn't say anything
You realise that people are waiting for our answers, don't you ?
Of course
Fine...I know its tough for you esp since you are a girl to say it first..But it was a Yes for me even after our first meeting...
Are you serious ?
Do I sound like I am joking ?
Omigawddddd
Why ?
Then why didn't you tell me ?
Coz I thought you needed more time to decide...And I will definitely understand if its a No from your side...This is not the occasion to think of niceties..Its your life that is under question...
You dumbo
Excuse me ?
It was a Yes for me too from the first day we met...
How come ?
You remember how it rained that evening when we went to Casa Picola ?
Yeah
..and do you remember how much you tipped the waiter that night ?
No..this is crazy...
You really don't remember, do you ?
No
Okie...We were dripping wet when we got in and the waiter was so nice to us...He brought me a towel to dry off and warm water and generally was very nice to us
Was he cute ? You seem to have noticed so much about him
Shut up. Why do I get the feeling you know exactly what i am talking about but just prefer to play dumb
Go on
Neway I think you observed all that and finally tipped him an obscene amount
So ?
Its these random acts of kindness that speak about one's character Mahesh...Nothing else does...
You're flattering me too much now
I am not..
So ?
Why do you keep saying So ? This is not a story. Anyway, I like you and I am telling my folks the same.
Hmmmmm

Buzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Can you please check that message for me on my cell ?

I should't Mahesh. It could be something personal.

Please.....Besides, I am driving and you don't want us to crash, do you ?

Ok..Wait...
Its from Sudhir and the message says " The other guy is YOU "

Whattttttttttttttttttt ? Damn

TRING TRING TRING

Its Appa... Double damn....

The End....Or is it The Beginning

2005-06-02T17:23:00.000+06:00

...but Appa, I have already spoken to her and fixed it up.........Yeah, I know it is our third meeting but its a lifetime we are talking about spending together and I don't want either of us to rush into this.........No, its not about me......I think she is a great girl.....Ayyyo, height is no longer an issue, Appa........And its ALSO not the specs...Why don't you just try and understand...... Now how do I put this ?.....I am clear but I really think she deserves more time........I promise this will be the last......Yes, I will tell you my final decision tonight though I think you already know it....No, you don't call......I will....Promise......Cmon, I agreed to this whole circus only to please you now just let me have my way on this one thing....Bye...Pass on my love to Amma and Paatti....

I silently recollect the telephonic conversation that had taken place just an hour ago. How time flies....And here I am sitting at our table, waiting for her to come back from the restroom wondering yet again why she'd rushed off there for the third time in the evening. I am sure it isn't the call of nature nor could it be for reapplying her make-up since she seldom wore any, maybe it is just cold feet over the impending big decision or is she calling a girlfriend for advice ? Damn. Why do I even think so much ?

Sorry to have kept you waiting Mahesh
Thats okie
So where were we ?
I am not so sure I want to continue that debate
Yeah, I was asking you what is it with you post-grads and the paranoia for an arranged marriage ?
I don't think its fair to specifically target ur guns only on us poor post-grads...and honestly, paranoia would be an overstatement
To answer your first point, I have not seen a single guy in my batch worry about finding his intellectually compatible soulmate...To respond to your second, if its not paranoia then how would you put it ?
Hmmm.. How about anxiety ?
Ha Ha Ha...
Oh yeah, you can laugh as much as you want but all your IITians can think of is going abroad and earning in $, so all these guys want is a nice, domesticated girl who can cook, clean and bear their children
Now you're being unfair...
See, lets just give this a skip...How about returning to the topic we were discussing before you so smartly turned the tables on me...
You ar every persistent, aren't you ?
Of course esp since you've stirred my curiosity and left me mid-stream..
Okie, what do you want to know ?
What was your impression after our initial exchange of emails ?
I thought I had already answered that. You came across as weird - like i said - very direct - as in - straightforward to the point of being crude...
That part I know.. Go on...
I thought you were trying too hard to scare me away
Thats not true
....I know, but that was how it appeared to me.. And then those awful jokes...
C'mon, you loved them. You told me yourself when we first met.
You believed everything I said the first time around ?
Hey bhagwaan...okie, if I was sending so many not-so-positive vibes, then how come you didn't stop it there...
Thank Vidya akka for that. Remember, you came with wonderful credentials and a reputation of being warm and affable and sensible and a lot of such crap
Hmmmmm
Your turn now...
Hold your horses. I am not done with all my questions yet
Go ahead
Did you discuss me with any of your close confidantes ? I just want to know how women react in these situations
Hahaha...You remember my friend Susan...I did show some of your emails to her...
Are you crazy ? You showed her those exchanges ? Why ?
C'mon, I've known Susan much longer than I've known you and what was the harm in asking for a second opinion...

Buzzzzzzz

Excuse me, Can i just check this one message ?

Of course

Preeti and I are here at Pecos. Terribly down. Rush asap.

Errr...Is everything fine ?

Not exactly !! Seems like a couple of my friends are in some trouble. Would you mind if we make a small detour till Pecos ? I just want to check if they are ok...Can we ?

Of course.

We can continue for dinner from there

Harsh must be getting bored at Music World....Can I just drop in on him and meet after you're done with your friends. Why don't you gimme a buzz on my cell ?

Perfect. See ya in 10 minutes

(To be continued)

A quick story :-)

2005-06-01T16:20:00.000+06:00

Circa 2001
I stand in the queue watching a pretty girl, just ahead of me, struggle to handle the huge pile of books thrust onto her from across the window. Chivalrous me offers to help her carry the stuff till the hostel only to be rudely cut off in mid-sentence. The next day she apologises and blames her grouchiness on PMS. My poor Tam Brahm soul cringes with embarassment.

Circa 2005
A mutual friend is getting married and we are hunting for an appropriate gift when I have yet another of my brainwaves. The guy is 29 and a virgin, so what better gift than an illustrated version of the Kamasutra is my argument. She cringes with embarassment.

How life has come full circle !

More poetry

2005-06-01T14:45:00.000+06:00

Ahaaaaaaaaaa...Thamizh maindhanukku Hindi padal endral ishtama ? Vekkum, Vedhanai, Avamaanum...

To set right a wrong and thanks to Lazy, here is another song thats been bugging me all morning. Is it the awesome flute-violin combo (show me a better IR song for this combo and I'll treat you anywhere) or the mindblowing lyrics ? Or maybe its just the super cinematography of PC or the romance of the setting (Karthik is so freggin awesome) ...All said and done, Kaadhal Kavidhaigal is a classic. End of topic.

YES! I LOVE THIS IDIOT! I LOVE THIS LOVEABLE IDIOT!

kaadhal kavidhaigal padiththidum naeram idhazhoaram
kaaman kalaigalil pirandhidum raagam oru moagam
idhayam idam maarum ilamai parimaarum
amudhum vazhindhoadum azhagil kalandhaadum
idham tharum

(kaadhal)

kaiveesidum thenral kan moodidum minnal
idhu kaniyoa kaviyoa amudhoa silaiyazhagoa
pan paadidum sandham un naavinil sindhum
idhu mazhaiyoa punaloa nadhiyoa kalaiyazhagoa
maegamonru naerilingu vaazhththa vandhadhadi
dhaagam konda bhoomi nenjil saerththuk kondadhadhi
idhu thodarum malarum valarum
inik kanavum ninaivum unaiyae thodarndhidum

(kaadhal)

poomaalaigal konjum paamaalaigal kenjum
unai manadhaal ninaiththaal anaiththaal adhu inimai
thoal saerndhidum gangai sevvaazhaiyin thangai
enai orunaal palanaal thodarndhaal adhu pudhumai
koavilukkul aetri vaiththa dheepamallavaa
kaadhalukkuk kaaththirundhu kaatchi thandhadhoa
ini varuvaay tharuvaay malarvaay
enai uyiraay uravaayth thodarvaay dhinamdhinam
(kaadhal)

My Kinda Poetry

2005-06-01T14:03:00.000+06:00

Getting an education in a Christian missionary school was probably one of the best things to happen to me but if there is one aspect that I can find fault with, then its the fact that I was led to believe that good poetry always came from the Brits - be it Shelley, Keats, Byron or Wordsworth. And everytime I listen to the verses of Javed Akhtar, I realise how wrong I was and cannot but marvel at how Javed sa'ab works magic with the simplest of themes.

The song below is another of my all time favorites, a song I listen to whenever I feel nostalgic about a non-existent past (yeah)

Door kahin ek aam ki bagiya
Bagiya mein hai thandi chhaaon
Chhaaon mein ek kachcha rasta
Raste mein pyaara sa gaaon
Gaaon mein ek chhota sa ghar
Ghar mein ek ujla sa aangan
Aangan mein chandan ka palna
Palne mein chanda sa munna
Munne ki aankhon mein nindiya
Door kahin ek aam ki bagiya
Bagiya mein hai thandi chhaaon
Chhaaon mein ek kachcha rasta
Raste mein pyaara sa gaaon

Neele neele aasmaan mein taaron ka hai ek nagar
Jagmag jagmag ek taare par ek shehzaadi ka hai ghar
Chupke chupke raat ko uthke dhyaan se dekhe koi agar
Jhilmil jhilmil hai taarein mein us shehzaadi ke zevar
Shehzaadi ithlaaye, shehzaadi yeh gaaye
Door kahin ek aam ki bagiya

Aadhi raat jab ho jaati hai, jab duniya so jaati hai
Taaron se shehzaadi utarke munne ke ghar aati hai
Meethe meethe saare sapne apne saath voh laati hai
Sote munne ki palkon pe yeh sapne voh sajaati hai
Sirhaane voh aaye, haule se voh gaaye
Door kahin ek aam ki bagiya

Javed Akhtar / Zubeidaa

What visual imagery !!! Waaah !!!

ps: In case you did not get all the lyrics, here is a translation which gets the essence of it more or less.

The Kite Runner

2005-05-31T14:23:00.000+06:00

Starting off in the mid 197Os and narrated through the eyes of the protagonist, Khaled Hosseini's debut novel The Kite Runner is a searing tale that manages to weave complex, multilayered characters and their emotional struggles and triumphs against the backdrop of political turmoil that engulfed Afghanistan under Soviet rule and the oppressive Taliban regime that succeeded them.

The Kite Runner follows the lives of Amir, born into a wealthy Pashtun family in Kabul and Hassan, a lowly Hazara boy and son of Amir's father's servant. The two kids grow up together and are inseparable till a shocking incident that scars both their lives permanently forces them to go their own ways. Fates intervenes and years later Amir, who has since settled down in the US, revisits Afghanistan on a mission that will set right a wrong, a mission which will exorcise ghosts of the past and in the process discovers truths unknown to him. To reveal more would be gross injustice on my part to this surprisingly gripping first effort so I'll let you read the book and figure it out yourself.

For the first half and a little more, The Kite Runner chugs along in fairly predictable manner (I was almost tempted to think that its a Bollywood plot) and Hosseini invests a lot of time and detail in patiently building up the silent yet strong friendship between the two kids, the strained relationship that Amir shares with his father and the socio-political climate in the country. As the novel progresses towards its second half, it becomes more of an intense, emotional drama and we begin to realise that it is all about sin and redemption. The Kite Runner might not go down in the annals of English literature as an all time classic but is definitely worth a read for the following reasons

All the characters are so lifelike that one is easily tempted to think of the book as a memoir rather than a novel.

At the heart of the story, if one is careful enough to read between the lines, is a silent lesson about the value and impact of individual cultures without any biases and prejudices.

The end is the kind which will neither give you a false sense of forced happiness nor have you shedding bucket loads of tears - it manipulates your sentiments just about enough to give you a lump in your throat at the same time making one understand why it had to end that way.

Recommended.

Stories from yet-another-relocating-exercise

2005-05-30T12:20:00.000+06:00

When you are shifting homes, there is nothing like getting it done by the experts in the business. Pls note: I don't mean Movers and Packers who fleece the living daylights out of you and still do a bad job of it. I am referring to these pros (I guess they run 'Milk vans') near Madiwala Masjid who loaded and unloaded our entire stuff before I could sneeze "Gezundheit".

Now that I know all my goddamn wordly possessions fit into one single tempo traveller, I'm so tempted to live in a caravan like a friggin' gypsy except that my parents don't quite think its a 'cool idea' - They don't even think SRK's gaadi in Swades is cool - Baah, these generation gaps.

Packing time: I have soooooooo many clothes, am burning those that I don't like and don't use (the twain are different for those who've not understood me)
Unpacking time: I just don't have enough clothes...Need to go shopping :-(

What is it with me and homes I shift into ? The first one at Venkatapura was 200 mts from an awesome CD shop, the second at Jakkasandra was barely a stone's throw from Food Kemp who was my regular CD supplier and now at BTM, there is a CD shop right next door. I can actualy holler from my bedroom and he could pass it over the window. LIFE ROCKS :-))))

Good locality in parents' parlance means nice neighbours, well connected by public transport, all kinds of shops within walking distance and a park where people can sit and relax. Good locality in my parlance means nice birds. And for once, both my parents and I agree that BTM is a 'very good locality'. PERIOD.

I miss the fair maidens of EC7, EC9A, EC33 and EC36. I even observed a minute's silence today morning when I boarded my new bus. But havta confess, EC16H is really picturesque. REALLY PICTURESQUE. Yipppeeeee !!

In BTM, you pick a stone and hurl it in any random direction and the probability of it hitting an Infy / Wipro / Accenture guy is almost 99%.

Pls note: A lesson in probability
When you roll a die once, the probability of getting a 6 is not 1/6. Its 1/2 - either you get it or you don't. Its only when u roll the die 'n' times that its 1/6. (Long Live Prof. Ravishankar)

So use the same principle to understand the above mentioned statistic. If not 'n' times, throw it 100 times and you will see that I was right.

(To be continued as I am still on Day 1 @ the new house)

Women...Baaaah.... - Part 2

2005-05-27T16:37:00.000+06:00

I give up...I honestly give up...Not that I gave myself much of a chance to succeed one day but then I am not the kind of person who will accept what everyone says...Maybe I should have listened to the general opinion atleast this one time..So here is the line that all my friends of the fairer sex are gonna love reading..I absolutely cannot understand you womenfolk..Everytime I try to and think that I am finally there, I fall on my face...Its almost like that stupid game - snakes and ladders.. I have attempted taking one step at a time, tried taking the quick path through the ladder but the bloody snake just wont let me reach the finish line.. I think I better stick to Chinese Checkers...

Of course, if I am THIS agitated there had to be that proverbial 'last straw.....back' incident EXCEPT that in my case I've had quite a few of that kinds, all in this last couple of weeks. And if there is one common thread across all these incidents then its this 'lets-do-a-movie' thingy....

Act 1:

A conversation on MSN

Me: My damn Pondicherry trip got postponed
She: Y
Me: Shifting houses this Sunday
She: Poor larka
Me: Yeah..is your boi coming to town ?
She: No :-( Tied up with work. I hate life.
Me: Poor ladki
She: ;-) Was just wondering....
Me: Arre, I wanted to ask you sthg too.....
She: tell tell
Me: You go first, lady.
She: No No You tell first.
Me: Why does it always have to be your way ?
She: Ufffffffffff Bataoge ki nahin ?
Me: Okie, can we watch a movie this weekend ?
She: Wooohooooo
Me: :O
She: I was about to ask the same thing ;)
Me: Hmmmmmmmmmm
She: So which one larka ?
Me: Narasimhudu ;-)
She: Are u mad ?
Me: ;-) Why ?
She: We know no Telegu
Me: Kya Cool Hai Hum ?
She: No
Me: Star Wars ?
She: Tujhe kuch samaj mein aayega ?
Me: Nopes but still....
She: Next
Me: Bose...plsssssssssss
She: Nah
Me: Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
She: Kya karoon ? All your choices are lousy.
Me: *trying one last time* Bunty ?
She: You know I want to see that with ### :-(
Me: Okkkkkkkkk...DDLJ ?
She: Ha Ha Ha
Me: Why you laffin' ? Nazar ?
She: Noooooooooo
Me: Now i am MADDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD
She: But you only asked me out ?
Me: shucks...drama queen...
She: May I suggest something ?
Me: What on earth are you waiting for ?
She: :-) How about going to Cinema Paradiso and renting a DVD there ?
Me: But I am not a member baba...
She: You could go check..
Me: Why me ?
She: Coz you asked me out
Me: Ayyoooooooooooooooooooo
She: Don't whine. Its closer to your house.
Me: So will ya 'dress up' for the occasion :D
She: This aint no blooody date larka ;-)
Me: Then why am I doing all the work
She: coz asked me out.......simple.........
Me: But it could have so easily been the other way around considering u confessed
She: I know...but it wasn't... which means.. u asked me out....

....and to think I thought I've 'known' this woman for 5 years.

Act 2:

The two principal players are casually strolling at The Forum

Me: Why is it so crowded here ? Surely not all these people are here to shop
She(2): Sweetie, most of the men are giving exercise to their sore eyes
Me: ..and the women ?
She(2): Oh, we are here to meet our friends and let off steam after a really rough week..
Me: Oh yeahhh
She(2): Chuck that.. Tujhe pata hai ? The first time my boi brought his folks to PVR
Me: Hmmmm
She(2): They had gone out during the interval and when they returned to their seats
Me: Hmmm
She(2): My boi's father found popcorn in the seat and started eating it...And then he realised that it belonged to the lady sitting next to him..
Me: Hmmmm
She(2): Poor man was so embarassed...It seems he thought the popcorn came as compliments along with the ticket...
Me: Hmmmm
She(2): He'd never been to a multiplex before, u see... New to the city types...
Me: Hmmm
She(2): Hullo, I dont like your hmms.. Why don't you speak something ?
Me: You are always telling your stories and when have i ever got a word in edgeways ?
She(2): But then you never have stories to say and we need to have a conversation...
Me: Do we ?
She(2): Stop ur leching...Stopppit pls... its embarassing..
Me: I wasn't...Gimme a break...
She(2): Really ?
Me: You want me to repeat everything u said ?
She(2): No.. Hey, that looks like my friend Rashmi...Just hold on a sec, will ya
Me: Ok
She(2): Hey Rashmi ? What are YOU doing here ?
Rashmi: :-) Hi...was bored at home... so thought I'd do some shopping

*I do not see any shopping bags in her hand*

She(2): Oh, that way huh
Rashmi: Yeah.. and what are you doing ?
She(2): Oh.. we are here for a movie..
Rashmi: Which one ?
She(2): Kaal
Rashmi: Oooh..John Abraham...and aren't you going to introduce me to your friend ?
She(2): Oh, i forgot. Rashmi, this is *****, and *****, this is Rashmi.. We studied together at %%%
Me: Hi Rashmi
She(2): So...bought anything ?
Rashmi: Naaaa...Too expensive...Besides its so crowded here
Me: Precisely my point
She(2): Yeah
Me: Why don't you join us for the movie ?
Rashmi: No No..But thanks

*Rashmi's mobile rings*

She(2): We ought to be running.. See ya later..
Rashmi: Bye
Me: Bye Rashmi
She(2): Whats rong with you ?
Me: Why ?
She(2): Don't act.
Me: Hullo ?
She(2): You were hitting on her ?
Me: Me ?
She(2): Yeah... maybe you can join us...
Me: Now don't you dare ape me..i was jes being courteous to your friend..
She(2): She is no friend , just an ex-colleague
Me: But you were so warm and friendly
She(2): and you were checking 'her' out...
Me: Plsssssssssssss
She(2): Chuck
Me: Whats rong with you ? One line and I am overly friendly, two lines and I am flirting and three, I am hitting on her ?
She(2): Hmmm
Me: You women are so paranoid...If any guy is half decent to make polite conversation, then you mistake that for 'interest' and even if he is indeed interested, how does he put it acrosss.. You mistake everything for 'hitting'...
She(2): Are you interested in her ?
Me: Seee you are diverting us again...
She(2): Wotevah

......and this is a person I thought I 'knew' for 2 years.

Act 3:

A conversation on YM

Me:.....I missed the Mrinal Sen film festival coz last weekend I was busy
She(3): I know ;-)
Me: What do you know ?
She(3): Forget it nuh
Me: OK...and I so dearly wanted to make it three great weekends in a row...
She(3): :-)
Me: I am moving to BTM..Did I tell you ? Closer to your area :-)
She(3): Super. How much is the rent ?
Me: And I am shifing houses on Sunday
She(3): Need any help ?
Me: No. Thanks. Btw, U finished that C&H ?
She(3): Yes. It was awesome.
Me: Seee, I told you.. why don't you lend me that book. I would not mind reading it again.
She(3): When and how ?
Me: why don't we meet on Sunday evening..How about a movie ?
She(3): :-) Are you asking me out on a date ?
Me: Jesus fuckinggggggggggggggggg Christ....
She(3): ???
Me: Ufffff
She(3): ????????
Me: Whats it with you women ?
She(3): as in ?
Me: I just said lets see a movie and its been branded 'a date'
She(3): But you said lets watch a movie ;-)
Me: and when I go for a movie with my grandma, I ask her " How about a movie ?"
She(3): Really ? So I'm your grandma ?
Me: Thats not the point and you know it.
She(3): Whats rong in asking someone out on a date ?
Me: Nothing. Ans nothing. Except that I dont understand what a date is...
She(3): ;-)
Me:...and to be perfectly honest, my date is more with the movie and its jes that it feels better to see it with someone than alone...
She(3): Go on
Me: And its not like you are the date and the movie is just an excuse to be with you...
She(3): ...by the looks of it, that day will never come ;-)
Me: You womennnnnnnnnn... I give up...
She(3): so no movie ?
Me: Not if its 'a date'
She(3): Kanjoos, I will buy the ticket and the popcorn...
Me: *(&^%%*&(*)(#+%%*$)+

....and I 'knew' this woman for 3 weeks.

Women and movies, baaaah !!

Party time @ Merseyside

2005-05-26T12:45:00.000+06:00

When you've seen a team struggle in the previous round to score a single 'legitimate' goal (c'mon, THAT ball did NOT cross the goal line) against fellow English opposition and then find them trailing 3-0 against an Italian team in a cup final, how many footer fans would have bothered to stay awake and watch till the final rites were performed. I do not have the exact numbers and I am sure even the Anfield faithfuls at Istanbul must have been thinking of catching an early flight back home but, as they say, football is a great leveller and 6 minutes of sheer madness was the fine line that separated the victors from the vanquished. Of course, I promptly switched off telly at half-time and hit the sack imagining the scathing headline I would use for this post "You don't mess with 'em Italians" - Fortunately for me, insomnia raised its ugly hood and when I switched on again, it was 3-3 with 16 minutes to go. Yeah, Shevchenko came as close as that proverbial whisker to breaking the deadlock in the second half of extra time but somehow, my gut told me that the trophy would go to Anfield which is how finally things shaped up.

So what does this mean to English Football ? The debate about a 5th Champions League spot for England is bound to dominate headlines, Rafa Benitez vs Jose Mourinho has the potential to become another Fergie vs Arsene battle and Steven Gerrard might not move to Stamford Bridge after all.

Anyway the curtains have come down on yet another exciting year of Champions League football and though yesterday's match was a great advertisement for football, IMHO the 6 goal thriller between Chelsea and Barca at Stamford Bridge was the highlight of this season.

Next year My Men In Blue will rule. Till then...adios !!

Yet another superstitious forward...

2005-05-25T18:54:00.000+06:00

...except that I've received this thrice in the last 48 hours and I am posting it here as a WARNING to the next person who dares to send it AGAIN to me.

I SWEAR I WILL KILL YA.

Neway Lotus Touts is kinda cool to read the first time around so for all you people who like chain fwds and/or mush, here I go....

Lotus Touts: You have 6 minutes
There's some mighty fine advice in these words, even if you're not superstitious. This Lotus Touts has been sent To you for good luck from the Anthony Robbins organization. It has been sent around the world ten times so Far. Do not keep this message.

The Lotus Touts must leave your hands in 6 MINUTES. Otherwise you will get a very unpleasant surprise. This is true, even if you are not superstitious, agnostic, or otherwise faith impaired.

ONE. Give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully.

TWO. Marry a man/woman you love to talk to. As you get older, their conversational skills will be as important as any other.

THREE. Don't believe all you hear, spend all you have or sleep all you want.

FOUR. When you say, "I love you," mean it.

FIVE. When you say, "I'm sorry," look the person in the eye.

SIX. Be engaged at least six months before you get married.

SEVEN. Believe in love at first sight.

EIGHT. Never laugh at anyone's dreams. People who don't have dreams don't have much.

NINE. Love deeply and passionately. You might get hurt but it's the only way to live life completely.

TEN.. In disagreements, fight fairly. No name calling.

ELEVEN. Don't judge people by their relatives.

TWELVE. Talk slowly but think quickly.

THIRTEEN. When someone asks you a question you don't want to answer, smile and ask, "Why do you want to know?"

FOURTEEN. Remember that great love and great achievements involve great risk.

FIFTEEN. Say "bless you" when you hear someone sneeze.

SIXTEEN. When you lose, don't lose the lesson

SEVENTEEN. Remember the three R's: Respect for self; Respect for others; and responsibility for all your actions.

EIGHTEEN. Don't let a little dispute injure a great friendship.

NINETEEN. When you realize you've made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.

TWENTY. Smile when picking up the phone. The caller will hear it in your voice.

TWENTY-ONE. Spend some time alone.

Now, here's the FUN(???) part!

Send this to at least 5 people and your life will improve.

1-4 people: Your life will improve slightly.
5-9 people: Your life will improve to your liking.
9-14 people: You will have at least 5 surprises in the next 3 weeks
15 and above: Your life will improve drastically and everything you ever dreamed of will begin to take shape.

A true friend is someone who reaches for your hand and touches your heart.
Do not keep this message.

Aahsum weekend

2005-05-24T17:30:00.000+06:00

A three day weekend always does this to me. Yeah, I know I was here @ work the whole of Saturday but for once, lets not get too stuck up on technicalities... Lemme write this my way.... Returning to the story, I came back to office today morning and found that there was loads of chotu-motu things to look into and dammit, the last thing I felt like doing was to W-O-R-K. The boss had gone away on vacation and he'd given my email id as the contact person in case of any 'emergencies' and for the Japs, everything was an emergency esp if they didn't get a response to their mail within 15 minutes. (It seems you are supposed to mail back saying "Thanks for your mail. We will respond back asap.") Neway I am beginning to crib and I need to steer away from such moods so early in the work-week.

Having had unadulterated fun for two days, I have so many stories to pen but then I am also feeling way too lazy to type it all out, not to mention that even if I do get the motivation to do so, the sneering old hag will post some nasty comment ;-) How I wish I had a voice recognition thingy which would just convert my narration to text and then publish it as a post. Are you guys at blogger listening ?

One of the biggest advantages of having your folks out of town over the weekend is that you get to do a lot of things that you wouldn't normally get away with if they were there with you. Now before everyone starts thinking naughty, I am referring to stuff like waking up at 12 noon, delaying 'the bath' till its really late, skipping breakfast and lunch and wasting away the whole day watching movies on 'the laptop'.....What a Sunday !! Of course, later in the evening there was racing at Monaco which happens to be one of my favorite circuits and though Schumi didn't particularly do well (save that maverick move when he almost killed Ralf), Narain's performance (Ha Ha Ha) ensured that I would not forget this race for a long time. On the movie front, yes, I did catch up with a couple of more Bond flicks - Live and Let Die and The Living Daylights - and since everyone knows how much I love this series, we will give it a skip and waste more words on the third movie of the evening, Snatch. For those of you who've seen Guy Ritchie's (Madonna's man) Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels and enjoyed it to the hilt, this one is also a must-watch. Its got the same ingredients - irreverent humor, loud 'characters', loads of style n attitude and dialogues that had me in splits - and to top it all, Brad Pitt rocks. The only complaint I have about the movie is that it resembled LS2SB a tad too much for my liking besides the obvious inspirations from The God.

.....You're always gonna have problems lifting a body in one piece. Apparently the best thing to do is cut up a corpse into six pieces and pile it all together. And when you got your six pieces, you gotta get rid of them, because it's no good leaving it in the deep freeze for your mum to discover, now is it? Then I hear the best thing to do is feed them to pigs. You got to starve the pigs for a few days, then the sight of a chopped-up body will look like curry to a pisshead. You gotta shave the heads of your victims, and pull the teeth out for the sake of the piggies' digestion. You could do this afterwards, of course, but you don't want to go sievin' through pig shit, now do you? They will go through bone like butter. You need at least sixteen pigs to finish the job in one sitting, so be wary of any man who keeps a pig farm. They will go through a body that weighs 200 pounds in about eight minutes. That means that a single pig can consume two pounds of uncooked flesh every minute. Hence the expression, "as greedy as a pig".

The best Mondays are the Mondays when people around you grumble and move their sorry asses to work whilst you chill out at home. And that is precisely what happened yesterday. Having made plans (and even booked tickets in advance...no-going-with-the-flow types) to see the 11:30 am show of Kaal at PVR with FF, (The Rs 50 wala show gives me the real kicks) I woke up late to find that I had just about time to bath, dress up and rush to our rendezvous. The best part about having a buddies day out with FF are the outrageous stunts that we keep pulling on other unsuspecting sillies. A yellow sleeveless Tee and cool Lee capris meant that I 'acted' totally smitten by her and the outfit which caused our poor autowallah endless embarassment. Still laughing hysterically when we landed at The Forum, we realised that we were a little early and did some shopping tp while away time. We had absolutely zilch expectations from the movie having heard and read enough about how pathetic the thrills were and it definitely did not help that halfway through the movie, FF informed me that Ajay Devgun was a *bhoot*. So to get back at her, I acted as if I had already known that and mentioned casually about Amitabh Bachchan's guest appearance. Poor gal, she kept waiting for it till the end credits rolled on and was fool enough to even ask if the scenes had been edited. Reminded me of that joke about a guy who sees a Maryln Monroe movie end with her stripping near a railway track and a train blocks the sight and how he keeps watching the movie everytime hoping the train will be late atleast once ;-)

By the time the movie ended, it was 2 pm and we were famished. But there was still some 'domestic shopping' that FF wanted to complete which was when I made one of the biggest mistakes of my life. I know exactly how women shop for clothes but not even in my worst dreams had I imagined how long it would take them to buy shampoos and conditioners. We got into Health and Glow at around 2:10 and 35 minutes later, after smelling 26 bottles of assorted brands like Dove, St.Ives, Clairol, Herbal essences, Boots, Ultra Doux (did i miss any?) and different variants ranging from hibiscus, sunflower to rasberry and what not, we came out with Rs 320 worth of crappy stuff. Shucks. The last time I bought shampoo I remember just going into FW and picking up one with 10% off or 20% extra ;-) Shopping done, we finally had good yummy parathas at Aangan in Koramangla for lunch and then topped it off with a one hour chat over Death By Chocolate at the Airport Road Corner House. By the time I came home, I must have weighed 85 but w-t-h, I guess I'll work it off. An awesome day just became even more awesome when I found that my dearest mom had got me raskadams from Pondicherry. Kya karein, I am an absolute foodie. To add to the excitement, Bangalore witnessed a dust storm and some really heavy showers as a result of which there was no power supply whole of yesterday evening which meant I was again stuck with my laptop. Having had an overdose of movies, I thought I'd listen to some good music for a change and picked up my latest pirated MP3, the one I had not even opened since its purchase a couple of weeks back. To my utter disappointment, the 2 albums that I so dearly wanted to listen to - BaB and Paheli - that were mentioned in the cover were both missing and in the bargain, I had three other pop albums that I could have done without. Anyway as far as review of the music that was there in the MP3 CD goes, I think the brat and I share similar tastes and so I'll just second her opinions. And hey brat, don't ya crib. I paid Rs 60 for this crappy CD and I have Jaane Hoga Kya too :-(Putting aside my disappointment, I returned back to my favorite pastime (as if i needed an excuse) and watched half of The Motorcycle Diaries before I hit the sack to bring the curtains down on one of the most relaxing weekends I have ever had.

If only every weekend is as awesome as my last two have been..*sigh*
Neway, how was yours ?

My mommy bestest

2005-05-24T09:37:00.000+06:00

Many Many More Happy Returns of the day.

I know you don't like material gifts (not that I can afford any considering I work you-know-where) so here's the next best deal I can offer. I promise to be "Momma's boy" just this one day :-p I swear I will eat veggies, wash my plate, clean up my room, rearrange my books and maybe even do some grocery shopping for you. Just this one day :-)

*HUG* Have a great day !!

ps: I really hope you weren't lying when you said you've found the url to my blog....See, I write only nice things about you ;-)

2005-05-21T18:03:00.000+06:00

There is always something magical about working on a Saturday...Maybe its that eerie calm or the fact that there is not a single person within sight which simply means that I am completely on my own with absolutley no interruptions or unwanted disturbances as a result of which, work that normally takes 3 hours gets done in half the usual time. *sigh*. I just wish I could change my working week from Saturday to Wednesday or something like that...Anyway I digress...

Its been ages since I blogged seriously and there is so much that I want to record for posterity, so much to share but then there is also a strange emptiness that seems to engulf me whenever I open the editor. Though I've grappled with the idea of shutting down this blog for long, maybe now is the time for action. After all, what better time than to do it when your blog is a year old...a year and a day to be precise...Of course, the epitaph is all ready but then, there are a couple of promises that I made which are yet to be honoured..So maybe I will just hang around till I am done with 'em and then slink away silently into oblivion...

*shitt...I think i am getting into one of these obscure Saturday moods*.

Okie...First things first...Javed Akhtar does have a wonderful way with words..This particular song is without any doubt one of his finest works but after listening to it for god-knows-how-many-times this afternoon, I am just beginning to wonder if he went a little overboard with his poetic license...

A woman who reminds him of

a blooming rose
a poet's dream
a glowing ray of light
a deer in the forest
a moonlit night
a soft word
a candle burning in the temple
a note from the lute
a cool scented wind
a refreshing mist

All of this ? ALL OF THIS ? Gawd, where is this woman ?

Neway doff my hat to JA.

*pucca pucca I am into one of those Saturday moods*

Damn...I don't feel like writing any more...why is this happening to me ?

*perplexed*

...

2005-05-18T12:14:00.000+06:00

And those who were seen dancing were thought to be insane by those who could not hear the music.

- Nietzsche [1844-1900]

Chennai Diary - Trip 1

2005-05-15T13:47:00.000+06:00

Having reached Chennai at 0545 on Friday, my first taste of the city was absolutely awesome. Got in a 12B cut service from Koyambedu and was embraced into the folds by a blue uniformed conductor who reserved nothing but the choicest epithets for people who did not have change, people who did not realise that the bus was only till Panagal Park and well, for people whose faces he didn't like. Thankfully I did not fit into any of those categories (now that's suprising, isn't it ?) Reached home at ten past six and woke up all the buggers which is something I absolutely love doing.

Chennai is hot. Bloody hot. I was sweating like a pig everytime I came out of home. It definitely did not help that 19B was in the third floor too. Changes since my last trip....well..The biggest change was in the autowallahs and their attitude....Most of them have become goddamn smart.. They talk only in degrees Fahrenheit and not in degrees Celsius...106 and not 41...All of them have Chandramukhi posters in their autos and can't seem to sing enough praises about the movie. And yes, they have become really reasonable in quoting fares especially when they find out that you aren't exactly new to this great city. They actually say 'Thank You' and 'Have a good day'...

Other observations:
Movie halls like Sathyam have very affordable ticket prices when compared to the shitholes of Bangalore and they even accept credit cards for payment....Net cafes are sprouting in every corner and many of them offer decent speeds at very reasonable prices. The only sore point is that most of these shops do not have a/c so relief comes from old creaking Rallis fans and this is not much considering Chennai is so fregging hot. What else has changed ? Yeah.. we now have a STB at our house which means there are 104 channels to choose from. Of course, since all the guys had gone to work and my interview was only at 3 in the afternoon, I entertained myself watching channels which we do not get here in Bangalore...which reminds me that there is this cute Spanish channel that I must ask my local cable wallah to provide...Has some amazing cartoon programs at around lunch time.

Considering that I had been briefed so extensively at my workplace and I had well rehearsed answers to most of the possible questions that were likely to come up, I must say that the interview was a damp squib...Lasted all of 44 seconds...To be more accurate, I wasted more time sitting and waiting than in the actual procedure. Of course, it wasn't all wasted since there was this really cute (okkk.. mebbe I am getting to that age where everyone 'seems' cute but still..) chick from TCS who was just ahead of me and a decent part of the 2 hours was spent in getting-to-know-each-other-better talk. Twas a realy pity that I was on a very tight schedule for the two days or else, mebbe, something might have transpired. Neway it was a relief to see that the old tricks still worked ;-) Btw, just in case you were wondering, the firangs were extrememly friendly and showed none of the attitude that symbolise their nation but I am still going to reserve judgement till I meet more of that species. Of course, I am biased but hey, thats me.

Any visit to Chennai is incomplete without the mandatory pilgrimage to that mother of all malls, Spencer Plaza ;-) Of course after Fun Republic in Ahmedabad, the malls of Mumbai and apna own Forum, there isn't anything new that I have come to expect but then Spencers has its own charm and I havenothing but fond memories of the hours I used to spend at Music World in 2001. So with L&M in tow and a good couple of hours to kill before dinner, we wandered around checking out CDs at MW, the tee sale at Pantaloons, Kashmiri Pashminas at a few random shops finally giving our credit cards some exposure to daylight at the Zodiac shop. My balance sheet now boasts of a cool red tie on the asset side and my cash situation is now down by Rs 499 on the liabilities side. Thankfully I did not yield to temptation at Cookie Man (still watching my weight, u see) and Landmarks (so many books so little time). Shopping with L&M can always be a very exhaustive affair for she's never sure about what she wants to buy and this time was no different but it was still a great couple of hours spent together. A real pity we could not do the movie thingy also.

Dinner happened at the Saravana Bhavan on Pondy Bazaar. The less the better. I have never been a huge fan of this chain and this particular franchisee (and the one on Peters road) definitely needs to be nominated under the category of most inefficiently managed restaurant. Being a group of 6, we had to wait for a good 30 minutes to even get a table whilst 2 old ladies, presumably gossiping about Metti Oli over soda lime, made me grow madder than I have ever been in the last 3 months. Why on earth did the patron let 2 people occupy a table of 6 beats me and why on earth do people pay such ridiculous prices for obviously pretentious food continues to evade logic....Chuck de...After dinner it was movie time and unfortunately for me, another good friend of mine BK (who I hope will one day graduate to better tastes if he wants to become an assistant in my first directorial venture) had decided that we had to see Kingdom of Heaven. I have never been a huge fan of epics, more so after my bitter experiences with Alexander and Troy, and watching gory hand-to-hand combats filmed in true Ridley Scott style (yeah, the guy who made that Gladiator) wasn't exactly a great tradeoff for hitting the sack early. Neways, we still saw it and while the movie worked much better on an emotional plane, the grand battle scenes weren't so novel and the heroine wasn't a hotty ;-) Or maybe I was just too weary after a long day to notice her sex appeal...wotevah !!

Saturday. Woke up late, had a cool brekka with makkal at Balaji Bhavan.. the place just hasn't changed.. absolutey great food at value-for-money prices...The rest of the morning was spent arguing with pirated CD vendors at Parrys corner over DVD bargains. Finally got a great deal (??) and bought an Indiana Jones collection (all 3 movies for Rs 75...DVD 9.0 mind it), a Tom Hanks collection (Ladykillers, Green Mile, Forrest Gump and Philadelphia all for Rs 75) and The Usual Suspects single (Rs 70). Came back home and checked out the print quality and have to admit that I can't believe its not a original. Long live video piracy. Next in line: The entire Yes Minister series, the F.R.I.E.N.D.S collection, The Sopranos collection and Sex and City series for FF. Happy days are back again :-)

Just in case I haven't emphasised how hot Chennai is, would you get the point if I told you that we decided to see yet another movie just to beat the Saturday afternoon heat..Yeah, this time it was that much touted Srikanth starrer Kana Kandein. Decent effort but to sum up the movie for you, here's what you can expect or rather you shudn't expect....

# Do NOT be misled by interviews and articles in Tamil film magazines that Gopika has acted 'boldly' and shared some steamy moments with Srikanth. There is absolutely NOTHING in the movie.

# Successful cameramen just do not make good mainstream storytellers - they simply flatter to deceive. Kindly add KV Anand to that illustrious list of predecessors like Santosh Sivan (Asoka), Rajeev Menon (Minsara Kanavu was p-a-t-h-e-t-i-c and Kandukondein ^ 2 was passable at best), Thankar Bachan (Azhagi was good but Sollamarandha Kadhai was awful) and PC Sriram (Meera and Vaanam Vasapadum)

# Srikanth is good but not as good as this Mallu guy Prithviraj who plays the cool villain. Have to watch out for this dude.

Movie done, all of us returned home and played carrom till it was time to for me leave back for Bangalore. Another awesome trip to Chennai ended much before my liking. Thunder Mint at Gangotree, Airavath Bus journey, listening to Paheli on BKs car stereo....so many more memories but then this is getting too nostalgic now so I better call it quits. Can't wait to go back again for Appu's wedding. That should be fun and that time I think I should be able to meet up Rads, Zee, Sud and also do Kwiky's, Ispahani and probably an S.Ve Sekar play.

Wooohoooooo.

Currently listening: Chennai Senthamizh (MKSOM)

PS: Can neone tell me which Carnatic raga this song is based on and other popular filmi numbers that derive their source from the same raga..Treat assured.

Malaysia Saloon

2005-05-11T11:11:00.000+06:00

9-5-2005, 11:18
Hey Jupaa, whats with the new Thiruchelvan look ?

9-5-2005, 12:20
Ada naaye...Haircut panni thola...Enna asingum da idhu...(Bugger...get a haircut done...u look fugly)

10-5-2005, 10:44
Sweety, are you short of money ? Need some for a haircut and shave ?

A million memories....Flashback time...

During my very early childhood (when I was a real bachcha) I remember having some local barber coming over to our 'thinnai' (verandah) and doing his duties while Paatti would stand guard near the front door ensuring that the man did not invest anything but 150% concentration on the job at hand After a good 20 mts (used to be the era when quality of work was directly proportional to the time you took to do it) when everyone at home was unanimous in their opinion that a reasonably good job had been done, the barber would be paid his dues and dismissed. Of course, I could not come inside the house till I had had my 'kuliyal' (bath) near the 'kenaru' (well) at our 'kollapakkam' (backyard) which was probably the best part of the whole ritual.

I must have been 5 or probably 6 when I first went, with my father in tow, to have my haircut done in a proper saloon. I vaguely remember the awe with which I stared at the posters of heros like Rajini, Kamal and a handsome hunk unknown to me (which I later found was Jeetendra) that adorned the entrance, the mirrors on all walls inside, the huge swiveling chairs where the 'grown ups' sat whilst they were dealt with and the radio blaring out songs from Akashvani... When it was finally my turn, I remember being seated on a 'palagai' (wooden bench) above the chair since I was too short and the head barber brandishing a gleaming scissors and a green comb. My parents tell me that when I came back home, I cried a lot for no reason whatsoever (to my credit, dad tells me I never flinched inside the room) but that is one part I dont remember much. What I do remember is that the head barber, who was also the owner of the shop, had been very friendly and put me totally at ease which meant that I had just become a lifetime customer for him. As time flew and I grew up, Dad would no longer accompany me since he was now reasonably confident that the barber knew exactly what I liked and what I disliked. For one, I hated that initial water spray so for me it had to be a little lesser amount of water (just enough to make the hair wet and easy to chop off) than the regular. Unlike his other customers, I always insisted that he use a new blade when he started with me and this is a practice that happens till today. (just that for economies, he halves every blade and uses a fresh half for me) During those early days, the shop had just 3 seats so there used to be very little trouble on who decided what should play on the radio. When I was there, I always had my way (paavum kozhandai was how he would get the others to agree) and it was film music and not some stupid news (Neone remembers Saroj Narayanswamy ?) or farming programme.

Saloons in most places are closed on Tuesdays. During my school days, I had no option but to get my haircut done only on weekends and Saturday used to be my wake-up-late day which left Sunday as the only alternative. However unlike a lot of people, I enjoyed going to the saloon on Sunday coz it used to be crowded which meant that there would be atleast 3 newspapers and a couple of magazines lying around which I could lay my hands on. The usual practice was to leave at around 7:45 am and after a wait that ranged from 20 to 40 mts, I would finally get my turn and be back by 8:45 am which meant I could still have my bath and sit in front of telly from 9 am....Those were the days when cable TV wasn't as prevalent and more people saw He-man and the Masters of the Universe, Guiness Book of World records, Ramayan and the lot...Neway coming back to the saloon itself, it was here that I first learnt to read Thamizh. The Sunday newspapers usually had a 4 page supplement devoted solely to TV and cinema with hot, nubile women adorning the front page and the incentive to learn the language was the fact that I could then be privy to all the secrets / gossip of Kollywood.

More years went by and it was around Std: 6 or 7 when I became aware that a lot of my friends devoted a good 20 mts before the mirror everyday styling their hair in all sorta fashions. If it wasn't disco cut, then it was step cut...Or what was it... rambo cut...but good ol' me was always a 'summer cut' (means: go the whole hog) boy...The family believed that when u spent good money, you needed to get good value for it :-) It was probably around the same time that the owner moved to a bigger shop in the same building which could now seat 5 people and had a large waiting lounge. The interiors were redecorated, prices hiked and it was rechristened Malaysia Saloon. Curious me always was full of questions so I remember asking him why he had called it so for which the reason given was that the owner's son had gone to work in Malaysia (as a fitter or plumber or the usual) and having to endure very tough work conditions had run back home to his family occupation which made him a foreign trained specialist. LOL.

As I reached senior school and fancier saloons sprung everywhere in the neighbourhood, I continued to vest my loyalty with Malaysia though prices had now risen to unheard of astronomical highs (Rs 35 for a summer cut and Rs 50 for a shave and haircut was obscene in a small town like Trichy) Then college happened and though I was part hosteler and part dayscholar, I always came home for the monthly ritual. It was probably during this time that the owner also started treating me like a mature adult (instead of pampering me) and confided all his financial problems and personal family issues to me asking for advice. I think it was sometime in my last year of college when I first entertained thoughts of trying out a new hairstyle, esp since I had already got a job and wanted to live the life of a rebel in those last few months. After carefully rehearsing the lines that I would use to convince the man why I did not need a regular 'summer cut', when I finally tried to attempt it, I was in for a rude jolt. Here's what happened

"Vaanga thambi... Eppdi irukeenga ?" (Come in lad, how are you?)
"Nalla irukken annen.. neenga eppdi irukeenga ? Unga payyan Arumugham sowkiyama ?" (I am fine.. How about you ? Hows your son Arumugham doing ?)
"Adhu periya kadhai thambi... vaanga vetti kittey solraen" (Thats a long story.. let me tell you as I do your haircut)
"Yaen.. nalla dhaane irukkaaru ?" (I hope its nothing serious)

*addressing another customer*
"Indha thambiya enakku 5 vayasilerndhu theriyumm.. kaalam pora pokkula kettu pogaadhu orey pulla idhu.. eppovume summer cut dhaan..indha kanna pinna style ellam kidiayaadhu"
(I have known this kid since he was 5..He is the only boy to have been not spoilt by the passage of time...always does his 'summer cut' and not these rubbish fashions?

...and thus ended my briefest flirtation with fashion. The rest as they say is history. I worked in Pune and Chennai and trusted my cool hair to a lot of new faces but never was I treated as royally as I was at Malaysia. At SP in Mumbai, it was different for it was the first time that I went to a proper stylist's saloon where employees opened doors for customers, the AC was awesome, there were fancy aprons, foreign colognes and the works... But it was all machine operated and the whole experience lasted a maximum of 8 minutes and the Rs 50 charge almost left me feeling cheated. Damn. I could barely read the Filmfare and Stardust in that time.

So many more childhood stories... But all those for another rainy day...Yeah, its raining here in Bangalore... Yippeee...

Hazaaron Khwaishein Aisi (HKA) *****

2005-05-09T17:37:00.000+06:00

While for most of us, the 70s remains a decade that is clearly associated with Sex N Drums, Rock N Roll and everything Yankee, it was also the decade that marked the awakening of the collective conscience of the average Indian to the socio-economic change happening around him/her.

Sudhir Mishra's HKA starts off in 1969 and follows the lives of its three main protagonists through the traumatic 70s. It would be extremely difficult to classify the film into one specific genre simply because the movie works at a much deeper level than your average Bollywood venture. On one hand, we could call it a simple love story set in turbulent times where idealogy and circumstances cruelly contrive to alter the dreams, aspirations and destinies of the lead players. On a totally different track, we could call it a sharp commentary on the politics of the time (sans biased political overtones) with the director mincing no words in exposing the failures of the Nehruvian ideal. All said and done, HKA is without a shadow of doubt, one of the most hard hitting movies made about the political landscape of India. I can think of just a couple of honorable mentions like Hu Tu Tu or even Dev (for its honest intentions) which tried something along the same lines but where HKA scores is the fact that Mishra manages to convey the anger and frustration of the individuals without being didactic or overly dramatic. While good movies speak to your heart, HKA goes for your gut.

HKA derives as much strength from its finely nuanced characters and the inherent complexities of their behavior (not surprising considering Mishra is a M. Phil in Psychology from DU) as it does from its tempestuous setting of Emergency. A major part of the story is told in the form of letters written to Geeta, a foreign returned suave urbanite, by two people who are fighting for her affection - Sidharth, the affluent son of a retired judge, who is driven by the idealogy of the reds and who believes in social revolution and Vikram, who aspires to rise from the mediocrity of a middle class living to the high corridors of power and influence. The three first meet in St.Stephens and chart their futures in those politically active corridors of college. Sidharth leads a group of rabble rousing revolutionaries who plan to give up everything and dedicate themselves to the cause of the persecuted in Bihar. Vikram who will have nothing to do with fighting for the underdog slowly ingratiates himself into the system and develops political contacts that will help him in his climb to the higher rungs of society. Geeta, caught between the two men in her life, finds herself unwittingly drawn to Sidharth's magnetic personality but cannot find the courage to join him in his crusade. Fate intervenes and Sidharth goes to Bhojpur in Bihar only to find that things are worse than his worst dreams and that it will take more than time and blood to bring about change. Time and distance separate the two love birds and Geeta is sucked into a loveless marriage with an IAS fast-tracker Arun. Vikram's native intelligence and cunning sees him steadily make his mark in the durbars of the corrupt while continuing to remain in the fringes of Geeta's life. What follows is a reverberant journey dealing with the trials and tribulations of 3 people trying desperately to come to grips with life which seems to be moving much faster than what they can cope with, a journey which delves into the heart and soul of a nation suffering from a debilitating period of oppression and lawlessness.

With HKA, Sudhir Mishra clearly shows that Calcutta Mail and Chameli were mere aberrations and that he has still not lost the ability to churn out offbeat classics like Is Raat ki Subaah Nahin and Dharavi. (I have not seen Yeh Woh Manzil To Nahin) Watching a sensitive movie like this is neither a comforting nor a pretty exercise and Mishra ensures that the grimness of the past stays long after the movie experience is over. The movie is a timely reminder to global audiences that there is more to the 21st century Indian film industry than just Aishwarya Rai, Karan Johar or Yash Chopra. Judging from the credits, the movie seems to be a collaborative effort between Mishra and some French team and it clearly shows in the quality of the technical crew, be it the cinematography or editing department. Whatever I write about Shantanu Moitra's riveting score (and his brilliant usage of sheer silence) will still not be adequate to his immense contribution to the movie. Particular mention must be made of Shubha Mudgal's soulful rendition of the title track (a poem by that wonderful Mirza Ghalib)

*spoilers ahead*

The dialogues in the movie are the best I have ever heard - laced with irony and sardonic observations. Sample these

There is a letter in which Sidharth writes to Geeta and says "Bhojpur might be 1,000 kilometres away from Delhi, but is 5,000 years away otherwise."

And then there is another letter where Vikram tells Geeta "Meerut just had another riot yesterday. Only this tme it was better, just 70 died. Not that the people are overly concerned. There is more excitement here because an ironsmith's daughter ran away with a low caste guy. Of course, they caught the guy and trapped in a drum and boilt him. Just kidding...they just castrated him."

There is bound to be a lot of furious debate on the moral fibre of the protagonists but what is most endearing is that Mishra does not chose to adopt easy fix-its by offering cinematic explanations to justify the actions of the players. Geeta, for example, is shown as remorseless for the unflinching and often mindless devotion she has for Sidharth so much so that even after marriage, she does not think twice about sleeping with him and having his baby. Vikram, for all his chameleon-like ways, is steadfastly besotted with Geeta to the point of being self-destructive. Why you may ask ? But then this is love we are talking about and love can have no logic or reason.

Lets move on. As far as performances go Chitrangda Singh(Geeta), Roshan 'Shiney' Ahuja (Vikram) and Kay Kay Menon (Sidharth) are mindblowing and clearly underline the fact that given a strong storyline, you don't need A- stars to work magic on screen. Adding further depth to the plot are some interestingly etched cameos like the old-Congress-mould father of Vikram, the shifty local politican played by Yashpal Sharma and the ruthless Bihari hawaldar.

For someone who sees 2 movies per week in halls / pirated CDs (adding upto to 100 movies a year discounting ones seen on cable / TV) it would not be an exaggeration to say that HKA is one of the top 5 movies I have seen in the last 3 years. I realise its only May and there are still 7 months to go but I would be very suprised if the movie does not win National awards for Sudhir Mishra and Chitrangda Singh. For genuine lovers of the medium of cinema and for people who believe that movie-making serves nobler purposes than sheer entertainment, HKA is a must-watch. Go see it in a hall today.

ps: A loose translation of this extremely poetic title would come across as "A thousand dreams like these" but just like the movie, there is much more to the title than what can be seen from the surface. It would be more apt to call it "A tryst with destiny"

Quik Quik Post

2005-05-08T14:57:00.000+06:00

3 posts in 3 days and I have a long movie review also lined up for tomorrow.....Wowww, looks like I am really building up momentum towards the last few kms of my marathon...Neway, before I forget

Congratulations to Amma, my 'first friend' at SP, for getting married on Wednesday...Wishing her a long and happy married life :-)

Best wishes also to SM on getting engaged to Kruthika manni on Wednesday...Yet another one bites the dust amongst the gojas. *sigh*

Belated Birthday wishes to KS. Hope you had a rollicking day at one of those numerous you-know-wot in Sydney ;-)

Best of luck to 'the parachute' for her trips in and around Mumbai. Who cares if the scope of your project & even your guide has changed - just forget ur summers and freak out...Fun a lot, fikar not ;-)And yes, when you go to Pune get me Shrewsbury biscuits :-)

....and now its time for me to tie some loose ends up....

In case you peepul did not notice, Sidin is writing again and I found yet another cool blog belonging to, of course it had to be, an intelligent Mellu (thanks to Venks who led me to Anu who led me there)

There's nothing as maddening as....

2005-05-06T14:41:00.000+06:00

- finishing an awesome lunj and then having the stupid saunf stuck between ur teeth which means its another 20 minutes wasted trying to pry it out with a toothpick / ball pen (yeah) / fingers :-p

- having a cubicle mate who will just not stop talking gibberish about his Sai Baba service society and more such crap on a Friday afternoon

- getting sandwiched in between two obese women in a 3 seater in my 8:30 pm shuttle with one fatso chattering away loudly on her cell phone and the other chomping Kurkure continuosly (the smell drives me crazy and hungry, besides she does not even share it)

- paying Rs 250 as registration fees for a crossword event, finishing it in half the time allotted and then finding out that you've made a couple of silly errors and missed the prize by, you guessed it, one point.

- walking down four floors to meet the boss and hearing nothing but Mellu everywhere - from the corridors to the cubicles to finally his office. (aside: if there are so many of them here in my workplace, what about the Gelf ?)

- sending a 28 page SoW through fax thrice - the first time without the crucial initials on each page of the doc, the second time to the wrong number and finally to the right number (35 wasted minutes)

- getting into a lift with 6 people and having to endure two morons who just can't wait to show the rest of us how great their spoken English is (I hate private conversations in lifts...makes me wonder if momma taught these numbskulls manners)

- Jobe having an awesome front 9 where you are 9 under par and then screwing it all up in the 17th hole

(To be continued)

Ever felt like...

2005-05-06T13:24:00.000+06:00

....it is one of those days when nothing around you seems to be wrong and everybody is minding his/her own business and the world actually seems to not care that you exist and this is exactly how you want it to be, so that you can thrive in the solitude but yet....there is something missing... you feel a void... there is this vague feeling that something is lacking that prevents it from being perfect.... and then you realise that maybe this is not how things should be and then comes the sinking feeling that you are not in total control, for if you were, then you would change it to suit your whims....and all this while, you so dearly want to pen all these ramdom thoughts down somewhere but fear the consequences... what if people think you are 'mad'.....what if you are alone in this crazy game..

No ? Never felt this way ? Damn.. I guess you are just lucky...Thankfully I've jes come across another equally, if not more, quirky person in maami who offers me hope and consolation that being non-conformist might not be that bad after all. Thanks maami and a big wooohooo to this online world :-)

Maami,
You might shut your journal some day so I am reproducing here, without your consent, words that just reinforced my faith in the fraility of humanity

Selfish.

Sell Fish. Buy Crab. Eat neither.

When I die, I tell
him. Please forget me.

:-)

Currently listening: Zombie - Cranberries

Wanted: A logical title for this post

2005-05-04T10:18:00.000+06:00

Those who can't, teach
Before I get on with the rest of this post, let me first get done with the part I hate most...Finding fault with a rom-com...OK, as Ebert rightly points out, the movie is not a cinematic breakthrough, moves along in a very predictable fashion, offers very little in terms of novelty and is a good 15 mts longer than it should have been....And this is precisely where the wise critics and I will go our ways...

Technically speaking, a rom-com succeeds only when the director invests the audience in the plight of the lead characters and has us rooting for them to get together (which we definitely know they will) which in the case of Hitch definitely works. I am in no way denying that the plot and the sub plot are both derivatives of the beaten to death boy-meets-girl/boy-loses-girl/boy-gets-girl-back storyline but where the movie scores is in the subtleties of its characterisations. In Alex Hitchens (Will Smith) and Sara Melas (Eva Mendes), we have two people who are definitely flawed but in a very likeable sorta way, who seem so made-for-each-other that our heart goes out to them and we really wish for things to work out. On the other hand, in Albert Brennaman (Kevin James) and Allegra (Amber Valetta) we have the most unlikely combination for a couple who despite being in different leagues seem to have that magical something in common. So what happens in Hitch is a sometimes-comic, sometimes-romantic interplay amongst these 4 players leading to a lot of funny situations and the odd saccharine sweet tender moment.

Hitch offers a lot of smart dialogue for people who are careful not to miss the sudden shooter or the quick retort. The opening sequences of the movie and the first time Alex meets Sara in the bar are simply delightful for the sheer inventiveness of word play and wit in the scenes though some of the smart lines used might not work in real-life. My personal favorite is the scene when Hitch tries to teach Albert how to get close with Allegra on their first date

"Lean in, place your hand on the small of her back, say it in her ear like a secret. But watch your hand placement, too high says, “I just wanna be friends”, too low says, “I just wanna grab some ass”.

And as a particular dialogue in the movie itself goes

"Ninety percent of what you're saying isn't coming out of your mouth."

Ditto that for Will Smith's comic timing. He is awesome as Alex be it in the I'm-cool attitude he sports, the verbal sparring with Sara or in his patient attempts to teach Albert the tricks of the trade. Despite the fact that a lot of reviews mentioned that the best sequences in the movie involve Smith and James, I personally felt Eva Mendes was hot and there was tremendous screen chemistry between her and Will Smith. Though the movie released in the US during the Valentine weekend with a clear eye on cashing in on the lucrative chic-flick sentiments, let me assure you that Hitch is much more than that. I saw it twice, on consecutive days over the weekend, and I enjoyed it as much with the guys as I did with my buddy girls.

*start of snobbish attitude* And for a change, esp after my bitter experience with Bangalore audiences in Be Cool, the audience seemed to love the movie too and got almost all the funny lines. *end of snobbish attitude*

Besides not a lot of movies run houseful for a second week at Rex so that should settle it for the doubting Thomases. In case you still didn't get it, go for Hitch (4/5)

Continuing with matters of the heart, I've never claimed to be extremely well read but to feel as ignorant and ill-informed as I did yesterday when I heard about this Gretna Green is not funny. Has neone ever heard of this story before ? Please say NO.. Please...

OK...Lemme get it off my chest....What the hell is the matter with my darn mobile phone ? Never knew the alarm facility operated on a 00:00 to 24:00 basis..So when I set the alarm for 12:08 yesterday night and went to bed early I thought I'd wake up on time for Chelsea vs Liverpool..... &%$#@.... finally woke up at 3:45 am to realise that I should have set it as 00:08....I hate technology...and needless to say, Chelsea lost...Did neone see the match ? Was it a goal or not ? Neway post mortem on the season will happen in another post (Btw, apologies to someone I promised to call kal..mebbe we will jes meet up at Chennai.. easier that way...)

Currently reading: Godan - Premchand
Currently listening: Meatloaf - I'd do anything for love

Roman's Army

2005-05-02T14:44:00.000+06:00

Chilling out on a Saturday afternoon.....

2005-04-30T15:16:00.000+06:00

The best thing about being a very accomodating employee who seldom complains (to the boss atleast) is that when you finally crib, people really listen to you. I've had more than my fair share of trouble with my old ThinkPad starting from a HDD that crashed twice a quarter, a worn away external PCMCIA card and a battery whose charge never lasted more than 30 mts and so when I finally wrote my most diplomatic mail to the boss, he read between the lines and immedietly agreed to get me a new laptop. The only rider was that it had to be of 'reasonable cost suiting requirements'. Our online e-procurement tool gave me 6 options of which one was way too costly, two of which were too cheap to suit my tastes and one which didn't have wireless lan. So finally boiled down to yet another ThinkPad T42 and a Dell D610. Now some of my peers have a ThinkPad simply because it is sound and sturdy and has awesome battery life but most of the big bosses have a Dell D600 which looks so bloody sleek and is lightweight that when I checked out the features and specs of the D610, I knew this was exactly what I wanted. Can't wait to get my fingers on the baby...

On the business front, there has been a lot of news in the last couple of months that has caught my eye be it the recent flurry of investment activity in Sasken, the Adobe Macromedia deal or the rumor thats been floating since January that Siemen's mobile unit may be up for sale but the most interesting article I read recently was one on my favorite company Google.

SEARCH AND DESTROY
Bill Gates is on a mission to build a Google killer. What got him so riled? The darling of search is moving into software--and that's Microsoft's turf.

by FRED VOGELSTEIN

Microsoft was already months into A massive project aimed at taking down Google when the truth began to dawn on Bill Gates. It was December 2003. He was poking around on the Google company website and came across a help-wanted page with descriptions of all the open jobs at Google. Why, he wondered, were the qualifications for so many of them identical to Microsoft job specs? Google was a web search business, yet here on the screen were postings for engineers with backgrounds that had nothing to do with search and everything to do with Microsoft's core business—people trained in things like operating-system design, compiler optimization, and distributed-systems architecture. Gates wondered whether Microsoft might be facing much more than a war in search. An e-mail he sent to a handful of execs that day said, in effect, "We have to watch these guys. It looks like they are building something to compete with us."

To read more, check here

Okie, that's enough serious stuff for one post. Wanna take some time off to make a wish list ? You never know when God is listening, right ? So here is a site that lets you make a list of the 43 things that you want to do in/with your life. Go ahead and have a ball and yeah, here is my list ;-)

....and here are some movie recommendations that have been long overdue

Mumbai Express (Tamil) - 2.5/5
Chandramukhi - 5/5
Sin City - 3/5
The Upside of Anger - 3/5
Miss Congeniality 2 - 1.5/5
My brother Nikhil - 4/5

Coming soon:
Hazaaron Khwaishein Aisi
Hitch
Sachein
Kaal

sigh You can never win

2005-04-29T11:08:00.000+06:00

Relationships and advice
I've just learnt that I don't need to do much to get into misunderstandings. It just comes naturally to me. The other day a very close friend of mine asked me for advice. I refused because it involved putting myself in his shoes and thinking, which I was simply incapable of given the circumstances. Needless to say, he was terribly pissed. Then yesterday, another very good friend of mine had a serious problem where she needed a second opinion. Not wanting a
repeat of the earlier fracas, this time I gave her what I felt was simple and sensible advice. Guess what happened. Of course, she didn't like it and we fought. You can never win. Can I just say one thing to people out there ? The next time anyone wants advice from me, pls also tell me what exactly you want me to tell you back :-(

A canine story
I am scared of most pets be it cats, rabbits (yeah) or even 'supposedly friendly' parrots. Maybe fish are the only creatures that find me likeable and vice versa. Yeah, in case you were wondering, I deliberately omitted dogs from that list because I am SHIT SCARED of 'em.

*start of flasback*

Going back in the past, maybe it all stems from my initial experiences with 'the dog' in our street in Trichy. There was this old lady Dr. SS living a couple of houses away from mine who'd, having lost her husband and having no kids, raised a ferociious mongrel (c'mon, pls don't expect me to know what mix of species it was..It wasn't a pomeranian or a dalmatian, for sure) whom she affectionately called Selva. We, the kids, who used to play cricket near her place would often hit the ball into her house and then quarrel amongst ourselves as to who would retrieve the ball. On one of those occasions when I was the chosen one, I remember jumping over the gate and walking towards the shed where 'the dog' was tied in search of the ball. And lo, suddenly there he was with the ball in his mouth charging towards me. As I ran towards the gate hollering "Naai Naai", this is what happened

SS: (peeping out from her home cum clinic) Don't call it naai.. call it selva.. he has a name
Me: But aunty, it is still a dog....
SS: If you call it dog one more time, i will ask him to bite you...and then u'll need 25 oosis around ur thoppul....
Me: Ayyoo... plssssss.....plsssss.... ask selva to move away

Having licked every part of my foot, Selva was now sniffing near my cr*$ch and I was perspiring like crazy.

SS: Will you behave yourself and be nice to Selva ?
Me: Sure Sure
SS: Shake hands with him
Me: Nooooooo

By now, my other friends were howling with laughter and 'the dog' still seemed to be fascinated with u-know-wot

SS: C'mon, he is a clean boy, my Selva...Shake hands Selva
Me: Ugggh...Hi Selva
SS: Give b***u the ball, Selva
Me: Thanks Aunty... thank you doggie.. ooops.. thanks selva...

*end of flashback*

So much more to say about dogs, especially that horrible night during my autumns where I ran from K2 to our flat (1.1 kms in 3 mts flat) chased by a hungry pack of sex-starved dogs/bitches *shudders*...but why all this now you may ask ? Hear me out sweeties...Last week I had to drop something at a friend's place and knowing that his extended family included 4 huge dogs, I pleaded with him to meet elsewhere - in vain. Warning him to keep his brothers/sisters
in leash and armed with an expensive packet of doggie biskis (just in case) I dared to set foot in hostile territory. And the rest as they say, is history.

My welcome party:
Wow wow wow wowwwww
WOWWWW WOWWWWW WOOWWWWW
woww wowww
WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW

Note: Caps denotes intensity

My next 10 minutes:
SNIFFFF SNIFFFFFF SNIFFFFF SNIFFFFFFFFFFFFFF
sniff sniff
sniff sniff sniff sniff
SNIFFFF SNIFFFFFFFFFF SNIFFFFFFFFFFFFF SNIFFFFFFFFF

I don't think I need to remind you that I did not grow up all these 27 years to lose everything there to 4 dogs hence beat a hasty retreat. What is it with me and tall & sniffy dogs ? You can never win.

FAQs about the blog and my 0.02$ on the same:
Why does your blog have such a dullish grey-green for a background ?
Someone once told me "Hey buddy, your color scheme is classy. You rock !". I'll leave it to you two to come to a mutually acceptable decision.

I remember seeing links to other blogs you read on the right hand pane. Why have you taken them off ?
Maybe it has something to do with this offline message I got "You are such a loser. I see only women being linked up in your blog." Or maybe it has to do with something like this.....In my early days, I used to provide links to other blogs that I found interesting till I discovered newer and newer blogs which actually made the goddamn right pane a little too cluttered for my liking.....And then I found that many ppl were using this linking thingy as a you-scratch-my-back-I'll-scratch-urs kinda tool which was just so sickening that I decided to bury this controversy once and for all by yanking off all the links. Today, as and when I find something interesting, I do provide links within posts which I guess is working fine for me.

Why don't you keep a shout box ?
Too lazy to do it. If someone can send me the html code, I'm game.

Why do you need a sitemeter ?
One reason is that I'm running a couple of experiments on key word promotion and optimisation and I hope to use my findings from this page to build more traffic to my corporate page. Okie, so you didn't buy that story. The fact is I wanna know who visits my site...Yeah, I can track visitors by IP. So beware, God (me) is watching you !!!

Despite all my weird fundae and crazy justifications, there will still be people who aren't satisfied and who will continue to crib.

PS: God save me....I 'discovered' 4 more blogs yesterday night and a couple of them belong to my SP seniors, people who weren't exactly known for their academic orientation but guys who knew exactly what their priorities were.. Real rockers....Shit, so much to read, so little time. You can never win.

Oozing positive energy...

2005-04-27T09:47:00.000+06:00

Its been so freggin' hot in Bangalore for the last one week that I've seriously been wondering if Tanner Kinglsey really died or not...Neway yesterday's rains offered a huge respite from the sweltering heat and its been so pleasant since morning that I am so tempted to say

"Gar firdaus, ruhe zamin ast, hamin asto, hamin asto, hamin asto"

After managing to stay in bed for as long as I could (which I've found after careful trial and error as 7:06) and then quickly rushing through the daily routine, I was just in time to catch the last bus to work. And believe it or not, as if to reinforce that this day is going to be special, Saggy (who IMHO is much better to listen to than Vasanti early in the day) played some really awesome tracks...the rollicking O Saaki Saaki from Musafir (which is absolutely what you'd love to wake you up from the bus nap..and I so love Sanju baba dancing and doing his knife routine in this song), the slow and sensuous Tera Mera Pyar (Bombay Vikings and Falguni Pathak) and finally capping it with that brilliant Suno Na from Jhankar Beats which kinda summed up exactly how I felt.

Dil Ne Tum Ko Chun Liya Hai
Tum Bhi Usko Chuno Na
Khwaab Koi Dekhta Hai
Tum Bhi Sapne Buno Na
Dil Yeh Mera Tumse Kuch Keh Raha Hai
Suno Na

Dur Ho Kar Bhi Dur Tum Nahin Ho
Paas Ho Lekin Paas Kyon Nahin Ho
Tanha Tanha Sama Mehki Mehki Hawa
Keh Raha Hai Jahan Jo Suno Na

Dekhlo Mausam Kitna Suhana Hai
Pyaar Karne Ka Yeh To Ek Bahana Hai
Muskurati Fiza Gungunati Hawa
Keh raha Hai Jahan Jo Suno Na

Brekka then happened with JB (*smile*) and when I finally got to my seat, was pleased to see that there was no fire-fighting to do which means I can focus on getting things right for the two biggest days since I joined here, tomorrow and day after. Fingers crossed.

PS: These days work is becoming really interesting..I am having more than my fair share of 'celebrity' interections ...The CEO of a billion dollar US company who was tipped to succeed Carly Fiorina before he ruled himself out, a hot shot reporter from CNBC, the Governor of Virginia and a possible meeting couple of months down the line with Tony Blair (if he wins his reelection which I am confident he will considering the TINA factor)..What more could I hope for ?

Hrrrumpppp...

2005-04-24T13:45:00.000+06:00

It sickens me. It maddens me. It pains me.
The way people can be so judgemental. A couple of days back I had the fortune (??) of meeting up almost half a dozen of my old friends. Now I use the term 'old' and 'friends' very loosely here (for lack of an appropriate alternative) simply because I knew them for a very short time span in the distant past and none of them can even claim to have genuinely known me. As it usually happens with such gatherings where no one knows exactly why we've assembled together in first place, conversation tends to be more of the perfectly polite "I-am-working-here-now-but-why-are-you-still-working-there" kinds or the extremely impersonal "I-got-married-so-why-are-you-not-married-yet?". Knowing well that I was bound to lose my patience and cool somewhere along the line, I steered clear of joining these discussions preferring to sit in a corner and observe, only to realise soon that this was the worst possible thing I could have done. For even if I'd joined in the conversation, there was a good chance that people might have 'heard' me but not 'listened' to what I was saying, but since I was aloof, it was almost like I had something to hide so pretty soon I had two people for company. Now, one of them happens to have come across my blog and seems to have been a silent reader for long (I hope he IS reading this stuff now..I would have told him all this that day itself IF only he'd taken my hint of wanting to talk to him alone...nothing personal) Now, this particular friend of mine had just moved from Noida to Bangalore and soon we were disucssing about different cities, cultures and living conditions. Somewhere in the conversation, things got a little heated because he was going on and on about how lousy Bombay was and why it will never become a Shanghai. There was probably merit in his arguments too but then the problem was that he refused to see any positives despite me trying to drill some sense into him (considering I had lived there for 2 yrs and his only Mumbai experiences were limited to jetting in and out of the airport) Beyond a certain point, I got the feeling that his opinions weren't his own and mentioned that he'd probably been a little over influenced by Pinki Virani. And that was when all our problems started...Or rather the particular problem which has made this post a necessity...

"Hey, I didn't know you read Pinki Virani"
"Why shouldn't I ? "
"Cmon, that is serious faction and I did not quite think you liked those kind of reads"
"I read good books irrespective of which genre they belong to.. in fact, I've read Aruna's story too ?"
"Really...c'mon, not an MCP like you.."
"Jesus Christ, what makes u think I am an MCP... and even if its so, whats that got to do with my book choices"
"Naaah.. it doesn't quite fit the image I have of you from the blog"
"....and what is this stupid image you've formed, if i may ask so ?"
"hey, cool da..."
"Illa maams...sollu..."
"You see, I have never seen any intellectual debates, any thought provoking posts...you know what i am talking about right ?"

...and so the conversation went on...

Let me clarify this once and for all. I'm sure we are all in agreement that there are multiple sides to one's personality and a blog may or may not reflect any of them, leave alone all. I hope there are readers intelligent enough out there to perceive that online personalities could be different from real personalities and that bloggers choose to reveal / project whatever they wish to which means that there is obviously more to it than what meets the eye. However this does not necessarily mean that they do not believe in whatever they write and that most of them are phonies. I know this has not come out as forcefully as I wanted to but I won't insult the intelligence of the average reader by trying to explain in more detail for I am sure that even the LCDs understand exactly what I am driving home here. So for Christ's sake, stop judging people based on what they write (or rather, what they do not write) and go get a life.

If you still insist on knowing why I think this whole 'Prince Charles and his good friends, the famous dabbawallahs of Mumbai' story is nothing more than interesting copy....if you want to discuss why I think Paul Wolfowitz is probably not the best choice to head the WB.... if you want to know why I think Narain Karthikeyan is a pathetic driver who has more fans amongst pseudo-patriots than genuine racing enthusiasts... if you are keen to know what my suggestions would be to improve infrastructure in Bangalore...then my blog is not the place where you'll get your answers...Mail me....

Needless to say, the blog posts will continue to recommend Salman movies, discuss F.R.I.E.N.D.S, rave about Chelsea (just 1 more match) and have mushy love stories :-p

Dear God,

This ain't much of a prayer...Just need a quick answer to a short Q....Ain't I the best ?

Love,
Me

A prospective son-in-law is born....

2005-04-24T11:15:00.000+06:00

..and though his silly parents refused to take my suggestion for a name, I think I'll still call him Ishayu...or simply Ish :-) The little imp could not have chosen a worse time to announce his arrival in this world simply because I am working again this weekend and that means I won't be able to make the really long trip to check out if he is handsome enough to enter my family...Looks like my daughter is really spoilt for choice - Jaden Gil, Shashank (thats what his parents have named him....how on earth will they shorten this name ?) or the soon-to-be-born Bhavya (FF, start preparing for the dowry)...The gene pool is very important, you see...I can already envisage the swayamvar....

Quote Unquote:

Women are such big ?s - they seem nice enough when you first get to meet them, become a little imcomprehensible when you are friends, then morph into impossible-to-handle girlfriends, transgressing into annoying wives and finally to crazy mothers.

The provocation:

The first-time mother refused to let her husband take snaps on his camera mobile coz the radiations would affect her son... LOLLLLLLLLLL....And even after a digicam was hurriedly arranged, the snaps taken have been marked as "Not for Public Consumption" ...Kannu patrum, she says...She's completely lost her marbles !!

My day is made :-))))))))))))))))))

Atchoooooooooo !!!

2005-04-22T14:06:00.000+06:00

I seem to have this absolutely uncanny knack of falling sick just when I shouldn't. Tis all so frustrating. There is so much to do @ work but everyone else seems to have switched off today and gone into weekend mode. Of course we are having our annual Plancomm in the evening but why does the whole world have to come to a standstill for this. Here I am stuck with a splitting headache, a nasty cold and a cubicle mate who I'm beginning to realise might be related to thisuck's best friend and to make matters even worse, FF is on leave (read: no MSN), JB is on training (read: no 'moments shared' over coffee) and Strand seems to be closed. (read: replan 30 mts of Friday schedule) Clearly one of those days when nothing, absolutely nothing, seems to be going right. I just hope this bad run does not continue to the weekend esp since I have made so many plans - the movie festival @ Collective Chaos, rugby, Hitch, that one act play scripting...

Baaaaah....Life is a bitch !!

Currently reading: Sidney Sheldon - Are you afraid of the dark ?
Currently listening: Yeh lamhe - Zeher

Due Diligence

2005-04-21T16:46:00.000+06:00

A phrase that sends the shivers up my spine... A phrase that reminds me of a million future scenarios, none too rosy...Simply put, a phrase that is giving me sleepless nights and quite a few harrowing days too...

The other day one of my peers sent me a very cryptic mail which went like this

Dear xxxx,

Not to worry. This is not an official mail :) Need a favor from you. No urgency but call me asap.

Regards,
Whoever

Now, leaving aside the fact that he worked with our biggest competition for half a decade before moving over here which kinda explained the awesome communication skills he possessed, I was terribly intrigued by what personal favor I could do him. So when I finally got down to calling him 'asap' (a good 36 hrs after he had sent the mail..phones calls and me, you know the story) he explained that there was an alliance proposal for his wife's colleague's sister's sister-in-law (I might have missed one more link but w-t-h) with a Wipro guy who happened to be working in my BU and whether I could run a simple due diligence for him. Under normal circumstances, I would have politely declined to do it faking some excuse but this was one guy I had been rude to for almost the last 6 months so sensing a chance to make amends, in a moment of weakness, I accepted to help.

Usually I find it extremely difficult/embarassing to do even simple checks which involve finding answers to questions like

Can you pls check if the guy smokes ?
Can you pls verify if he is just a social drinker ? (read as: Drinking freq: daily/weekly/fortnightly)
Is he sincere at work ? (read as: will be get promoted soon)
Is he cultured and well mannered ?
Does he come from a good upbringing ? (read as: is he rich)

and in the rarest of cases (read: Telegu) , even not-so-subtle questions like
Does he have a valid US visa ? (read as: atleast potential to be rich)

Now all this is OK..Using one's ingenuity and judgement one can come to a fair conclusion about the person under the microscope but the real problem this time around was the presence of ONE damning question

Does he hang around with a lot of women in office ?

Now you know what my problem is, right ? Ever since, I have totally forgotten about this guy and all my energies have been redirected towards imagining what could happen a few months / years down the line...If this thing ever happens to me (God Forbid...is someone listening ?) I can already sense what the feedback will be..If they are unfortunate enough to get someone who doesn't know me well enough to give them the info they seek, then the worst that can happen is that I will be branded as aloof and snobbish. If they are fortunate enough to know one of my pals and then seek info from him, then I am sure to be scandalised simply because most of these guys resent the fact that I am friendly with a couple of smart ladies at work. In fact, I am fairly confident that given a chance, they would happily paint me as an obsessive womaniser :-( Given the problem, I am now worried how to set right this mis-impression. Should I swear off women ? (which firstly would be very tough..and then, in any case they would probably then brand me gay) Should I start cosying up with everyone who could be a prospective informant ? (Highly impractical) Or should I simply not care ?

Why can't we simply have a 'The Recruit' kinda scenerio (esp if the gal is a real hottie a la Bridget Moynahan) where the guy and the gal sit across each other and ask questions which are answered with a lie detector lurking behind ?

Hmmmmm....

Goodbye to old memories...

2005-04-20T13:00:00.000+06:00

Its a new day, its a new start and hopefully this time we'll make it work. Yes.

We patched up. Yet again :-)))))))))))))))))))))))

Kela no: 1

2005-04-19T15:25:00.000+06:00

04:42:21

Mahesh, the muhurth is at 6 am and we need to leave atleast by 5:30.. Wake up..Amma and I have taken our bath, Appa is in and you are next...
Viddu, do I really need to come ? I mean, I did not wake up before 6 even on Diwali and here we are talking about the Upanayanam of some second cousin...whats his name...Nishant... I've never met in my whole life and I'm expected to change my holiday habits......
But the entire family is congregating da. Murali mama is coming all the way from Singapore and you can't move your fat ass from BTM to Hebbal....
Its a bloody Sunday dammit..besides you guys need me only as a chauffeur...Why don't you take the car ? I'll manage with Pri's Zen...
The pottery class again ?
Yeah...Don't feign as if you don't know...
Hmmm...so what time will you come to the mandap then ?
Class is from 9 to 12.. I will come for lunch but remember, I am not staying beyond 2...
Movie ?
Yeah... and I have something else lined up too...
Is today the day ?
Maybe.. Haven't decided... will go with the flow..
All the best da...
Vidya, avana udu...He won't come somberi...Vandila petrol irukaada ?
Full tank ma...

08:33:19

Good morning Mahesh...
Hi Pri...
You sound very groggy...slept well ?
Illadi.....got woken up at 4:45 again... and as usual had to fight to stay off the function......
But you should be attending such get-togethers....
Not another lecture pls...OK...
Do you realise you promised to come and pick me at 9...which is like 26 minutes away...
Listen, can you go by auto today ? Something else has suddenly turned up and I need to borrow your car....Of course, I will pick u back from class...
No problem..Come home and take the keys from Mom..so eppo varuva ?
Quarter to 12... the usual ? fine ?
Yes buddy...
Chill....

12:02:54

Been waiting long ?
Nopes...Just came a couple of minutes back...How did the class go ?
...and what should my answer be ?
Hahaha... You are right.. Whatever you say, I don't get it... so why ask... you are right...
Finally you're seeing some reason...So what plans for today ?
Can we just drop in at that function ? Periamma called and blasted me...Thalai kaamichittu vandhudlaam......
Appa....Thank God you finally relented...But I am not appropriately dressed and this is a family affair where I won't fit in so why don't you go ahead and we'll meet later when you're free...
Are you mad ? If you come I'll atleast be able to wriggle out earlier.. Please don't refuse deee...
Uffff.....fine... let's go....

12:25:28

Amma, Mahesh anna has come...Hello anna, you've become taller...
Hahaha...and so have you Ajit....
Akka kaettiya... anna also thinks I am taller...
He knows anything else will upset you...Stop making a fuss about it Ajit...You'll grow, don't worry...Hello Mahesh...
Hey Shwets, how did the sem exams go ?
Good. Thank you.
Harini enga ? Aala kaanum ?
Anna, she is in the Store room with Brinda manni arranging the thamboolam packets...
Dei Ajit, how is your tennis coming along ? I told you to come home and borrow my Wilson and you haven't come yet...
Vendaam Mahesh... As it is, he wastes so much time with sports..Next year he has his board exams and he has to start now....
There you go, playing typical elder sis....Give him space Shwets.. He'll do fine...
Yeah.. Btw, Mahesh, aren't you gonna introduce your friend to us ?
Ohho... sorry.....Ajit and Shweta, meet Priyadharshini my friend...Pri, Ajit and Shweta are my second cousins...My mom's eldest cousin's kids....
I am no kid...
Hahahaha.. I know you're doing your post grad but you'll always be my kid sis, Shwets...Ah, there comes Harini...
Ayyyoooooooo..Mahesh, eppo vandha ? You've become fatter...chaaaaa... no exercise-a ? And lips are black...dhum uttutannu sonna ?
Cheee podeee...Harini, meet my friend Priyadharshini...I can see Saambu Periappa coming... Let me go meet him before he sees me... why don't you folks chat up till then...and Harini, no kusumbu ok ?
Seri seri.. Nee poda illena Periappa vandhu kadiya poduvaar inga...
Akka, can we call you Priya ?
Of course Ajit...So you play tennis huh ?
Aamaam akka...Was more regular when we were in Calcutta but ever since we moved last year haven't quite settled down.
No problem.. Mahesh has friends in the Koramangla Club so maybe you can take his help...
He already has...Neway don't let Ajit bore you with his stories.. Why don't you tell us about yourself ? What do you do Priya ?
I work as a fashion designer...I help my brother who runs a garment store....
Wowww.. Very interesting...You're a Bangalorean ?
Yes. Was born here, studied a couple of years in Chennai but everything else has been in Bangalore. I stay in Malleshwaram.
Oh ho..and how do you know Mahesh ?
Common friends.

Hey Priya, nee eppo vandha ? Thanks ma.. Mahesh naan sonna ketka maattan.. Thanks for bringing him here...
No Aunty..I tried to convince him but finally I think he made his own decision... You know how obstinate he can be !!
Ha Ha Ha...Still thanks ma..Its such a relief that he hangs out more with sensible people like you....andha Venky veetukku varumbodhellam bayamma irukku...I need to go now but u shud definitely stay back and join us for lunch... Harini, Priya kootindu introduce her to all our family...
Seri Chithi...
Bye...

12:29:26

You don't worry... I shan't do anything like that if you are uncomfortable..
Thanks a million Harini.. you know how embarassing it can be...
So Aunty knows you huh ?
Ya.. I've been home a couple of times...
Mahesh took you home ?
Ya... why do you ask ?
Illa... aise hi...and is your brother married ?Do you have any other sisters ?
Forget Shweta... You tell us where and when did you meet Mahesh first ?
Yeah akka.. Tell us no...
I hope you don't think we are intruding...
No No.. though I am just a little curious about why I am suddenly being questioned...
Nothing to be afraid of.. We are just two curious cats...
Mahesh and I... we met sometime in October just before I went abroad..I used to work in a software firm at that time......I think it was at PVR that we first met..You know that place right ? At The Forum on Hosur Road..
Yeah.. I know....and then how did you become friends ?
He was there with Divya and my best buddy Shiv.. You might be knowing them.. Divya is Mahesh's really close friend...
Shiv...Oh he was Harini Akka's friend too in college..
Really ? I did not know that...
We studied in Chennai together and even dated for sometime.. but adhu kidakudhu... you tell us about you and Mahesh...
Nothing...there is no story.. so we got introduced there...and we've been friends since then...
C'mon, there is more to this... We are all part of the same family now..You can tell us...We'll keep your secrets...
Harini, plssssssssss...
Nee summa irudi Shweta...
There are no secrets at all. Neway can I ask some qustions now ?
Of course...but just two questions and we will tell you...
This Mahesh... Was he always a woman's man ? See, he's just been here for 15 mts and he is already flirting with that girl.. Yaar aval ?
Oh adhuva.. She is Mythili...Brinda manni's neighbour's daughter...Avalukku eppovume oru kannu Mahesh mela...
Mythili akka is a University basketball player...See how tall she is.. Mahesh anna and she talk a lot about sports...
Is that all you had to ask ?
You haven't answered my question..
See Priya..Mahesh has a lot of women friends but none of them are close.. I mean, its all platonic relationships...Wait....Are you talking of Manjusha and Bhargavi ?
Yes. So you know everyone in Mahesh's life huh ?
You can say that...
Then how come you didn't know about me ?
Appdinnu oru act kudutha nambittela ?
No undue respect pls...
I don't think you have any competition...Mahesh has never taken any of those women home...
Who was talking about competition ?
I just thought you sounded a trifle insecure.
You are too much Harini. OK..One more question ? I assume you won't discuss any of this with Mahesh...
Of course not... Our lips are sealed
Why does your brother always watch movies from 2 to 6 ? Why this fetish for matinees ? Why does he hate staying out after 6 pm ?
Mahesh hates crowds
....so ?
Illa Priya.. what Shwets means is that Mahesh is not the kinda guy who will go out on a date when the streets are crowded so that he can flaunt his gal or something..He likes his space.. he values his privacy...Besides his point is that since we have come out anyway to watch the movie, how should show timings matter ?...I know thats crazy but thats him..
...but i like my afternoon siesta...
all the more reason why he prefers matinees coz he feels people waste too much time over the weekends doing nothing...
And what does he do later in the evening ?
Akka, idhu kooda theriyaadha.. Sunday evenings are for football in the TV or snooker at Raju mama's house and Saturday mornings are for cricket..Anna is the fiercely sporty kind...
I know...so idhu dhaan kadhaya ?
You speak good Tamil for a Kannadiga..
No No.. We are Thamizh and we speak thamizh at home... basically from Kumbakonam...
OK
So how long have you been going steady ?
No No.. I am not his girlfriend.. We are just good pals...
Ha Ha Ha
Nejama pa...
Ha Ha Ha
Harini, sirikaadha...Mahesh is coming..
Hey guys. sorry Pri but I got held up... and there's more bad news.. Periappa says no leaving without lunch..Why are giggling, Ajit ?
Onnum illa anna..
hey Harini, I can see that mischiveous gleam in your face.. Been upto your usual tricks ?Sathyama illapa.. You ask your girlfriend, naan onnume pannala...
Lets have lunch... we need to leave...

13:17:13

Why are you so silent ?
Nothing
C'mon, you can tell me. Did my cousins say something wrong ?
Not at all. On the contrary, they were great fun...
Yeah.. though I would not trust that Harini one bit....she is a real devil...
Hmmm
Did you get to meet any of my relatives ?
No
Amma told me she saw you...I am sorry..
Its OK
Aren't we having a very monotonous conversation ?
Yes
Did not know it was the day of monosyllables today..
Sorry...All your cousins think I am your girlfirend...
Is it ?
Thats not much of a reply...
So what do you think ?
I don't think I was ever asked...
Yeh sub poochna padtha hai kya ?
Of course.. why do you have to take everything for granted ?
OK OK.. I adore you...
Is that supposed to be comprehended as "You are my girlfriend"
You should have been a lawyer...
Hmmm..

13:22:55

The food was great, wasn't it ?
Awesome it was... the vada though could have had some more uppu...
Don't worry... we won't let it happen at our wedding....
Mahesh, you are impossible..
Why ? What is it now ?
Why do you keep doing it all the time ?
Now what deee....ayyoooo...
Wait...let me put it this way...did you just ask me to marry you ?
If you want to put it that way... but I thought you already knew...
I didn't.. In fact, look at it this way... I just heard that you were serious about our realtionship a minute back...
The girlfriend thing ?
Aur kya.. and now you talk about marriage....
I didn't know you were so slow in taking hints..I thought we had passed that stage a long time back...
Women don't know.. they need to be told Mahesh....
Fine
.......and are there any other suprises in store for me today ?
Now that you mention, I do have a ring in my jeans which I proposed to use later in the evening...
omigawddd.....
...but since we are already there, maybe I should do it now...
No No No.. DON'T....
No what ?
Don't propose..
But why ? You don't like me...
I know you are not going to like this... but hear me out.. I think we are rushing too quickly here.. Waittt.. Its not me.. I know I love you and I haven't wanted anything more than this... But I think I don't deserve you...You are way too nice...There are sides to me you haven't seen....I want you to think this through a little more carefully....
Can I make a point here ? Will you give me a little more credit ? Will you please let me decide what I want ?
Don't get angry Mahesh...Can you pls do this for both of us... Can you wait for some more time ? I want you to be crystal clear before you take this huge step..
I am clear even now..
Please....
Fine...
You ok ?
Hmmm
Look at me baba...
Am driving...
Don't sulk baba..
I am not..
If you're not feeling like it, we can ditch the movie..
No...
Neway which movie are we seeing ?
%$#@
Why are you swearing ?
Nothing..
Which movie are we going ?
Lucky: No Time for Love

Phillum kaattatta ??

2005-04-18T16:10:00.000+06:00

Saw Nayakan for the umpteenth time again on Saturday in Podhigai and could not but marvel at this masterpiece. Clearly one of Mani's timeless classics. Every scene is the movie is so carefully sculpted that it would be impossible to single out the best. Purely from a screenplay standpoint, here are some of the scenes that will always stand out in my memory

* when the Police Commisioner begs Kamal to avenge the injustice done to his daughter and Kamal's reaction & body language in the whole scene (It is believed that Varadaraja Mudaliar used to actually sit on the floor instead of the sofa and talk to his people, exactly the same way as Kamal does in the movie.. Now that's homework for you) Watch out again when the Police Commisioner returns to thank Kamal and also warn him. He departs saying his daughter is now truly happy - check out Kamal's reaction to that.

* when Kamal's daughter confronts Kamal in the courtyard after seeing Janakaraj and Co: indulge in violence near Jehangir Art Gallery. The dialogue in this scene is simply brilliant, showing how 'right' and 'wrong' is all a matter of perspective.

* when the ailing Kamal listens to Nizhalgal Ravi explain how he will eliminate the approver and then Kamal symbolically hands over reins to his son by calling him Naicker and offering him paan. Just watch how Ravi eats that paan. Waaaaaaaaaaaaaah !

* the entire chain of sequences when Nasser and the cops raid the slum in search of Kamal starting with Delhi Ganesh's arrest culminating in Anjamma setting herself on fire.

Of course I have deliberately omitted the two scenes that have become almost synonomous with the film namely the climactic "Neenga Nallavara Kettavara" scene and the death of Nizhalgal Ravi but then, IMHO, they are a tad over-rated.

Btw, Sunday night and Yuva was on in Zee Cinema. Though my views on this movie are well documented here, one small point that caught my attention this time around was that the color schemes that have been used for each of the three sections (red for AB, green for Ajay and blue for Vivek) of the first half are a lot more subtler than I had first imagined. For instance, when Michael goes to the villages exhorting the people to stand up for themselves, observe carefully that the doors for most of the houses are in green. Ditto for the walls of Michael's own home. In Lallan's case, many of the houses in the barracks where he stays have rusted doors / roofs which are mostly reddish brown in color.

It isn't often that Tamil audiences are blessed with The Super Star's movie release but then after the colossal failure of Baba, expectations were sky high of Chandramukhi. Slated to open on Tamil New Year's Day, the buzz in cine circles was not whether it would be a hit or not but whether it would do enough business to make up for even Baba. Even though The Super Star had promised to release lesser number of prints and price tickets affordably hoping to return to the old MGR formula of using House Full boards and word-of-mouth to ensure the success of the movie, ground reality was exactly the opposite. No suprises then when I heard that Rohini in Koyambedu was selling balcony tickets for Rs 225 over the counter and there were atleast 8 halls releasing the movie on the same day even in Bangalore. Advance booking for these movies is a farce so resolving to watch the movie in black, I set out on Thursday to my aasthana SriBalaji theatre.

"All shows Houseful saar. Inikku 5 shows, Rendu balcony tickets for matinee venuma...velay jaasthi..500 roobaah aagum...Evening show ticket irukkku...Rs 150 for one ticket...show 8 manikku" said my friendly watchman Veeresh.

I am a huge RAJINI fan (which Tamilian isn't...if not he ain't Tam) but for a minute I hesitated to shell out this steep rate simply because my friends who had seen Apthamitra had not had very nice things to say aout the movie and reluctant to waste such hard earned money on a prospective dud, I chickened out. A holiday still cannot be wasted so I went and watched Mumbai Express FDFS promising to myself that I would watch SUPER STARs movie over the weekend. Come Sunday and it was 1 in the afternoon when my weekend-movie-partner and I met for our usual rendezvous. The touts at Urvasi were asking for Rs 250 for a balcony ticket and Rs 150 for a rear stall ticket but there was still an hour to go for the movie. One of the biggest skill sets I have acquired over the last 3-4 years of movie watching is this ability to negotiate tough with touts at movie halls. The first rule to follow is that you must never reveal to the seller that you are depserate to watch the movie and that going back home is not an option. The second rule is that when there are more than one sellers you should shop around and pit one against another. After those inital minutes of carefully gauging the situation, you must put on a brave face and wait till the opponent blinks first. For example, I finally bought two C row rear stall tickets for Rs 100 each at around 1:50 pm when the seller was getting jittery that he might end up not selling some of the tickets (he had around 15 more) Of course in another 10 minutes with the movie slated to start at 2, he might have become even more desperate and sold it cheaper but then you might end up buying tickets for seats which are not together, seats which are too near the screen or as it happened in one case yesterday, the seller got so sick of his buyer's bargaining that he decided to see the movei himself again for the second time. Anyway, I got sidetracked. Coming back to the movie itself. CHANDRAMUKHI rocks... So what if its totally unlike any of the other Rajini movies where he simply hogs all the limelight, so what if there are no punchlines, so what if the fights are too few and far between, so what if there is no villain to hate, so what if the songs are very average, so what if the plot resembles that of an Amar Chitra Katha, so what if Jothinka thinks popping her (already) huge eyes out will win her a National award, so what if Saurav Ganguly keeps putting in guest appearances in every single reel, so what if the original Malayalam director is ranting at this murder of his super duper effort...CHANDRAMUKHI rocks.... simply because it is Thalaivar's movie and the only ratings that are possible are AWESOME and ABSOLUTELY AWESOME. Did I forget to mention that I almost died when I opened my big mouth and asked the guys sitting in front of me to sit down and watch the movie ? I cannot believe I was such a damn fool to ask genuine 'rasigars' to not enjoy/celebrate lyrics like

Annonda paatu attam poduda
Akkaraiya ketta artham nooruda (reallyy ???)

Sakkadaikkul pogi, southam seiyum pearu
naalu naal leevu potta, naari pokum ouru
Hey deavuda deavuda
Ezhu malai deavuda
Chududa chududa
Enga pakkam chududa
Enkalu ullamkal ellamea vairankal
Nee konjam patta thidda
Reapeat-eu

Dear God,

Get into thalivar's confused brain and make him sign one last 'masala' movie...Plsssssssss.....

Love,
Me

Wokay... Peace Peace....

2005-04-15T18:02:00.000+06:00

Bloggy boy is behaving properly now so before I forget...I was off yesterday and hence could not wish all of you so here I go... Iniya Parthiba Varusha Vaazhthukkal...and to all my Mellu friends.. Happy Vishu...

...and of course, today is April 15th.. very special day....A couple of Birthdays...

Anjali,
Many Many more happy returns of the day.. Hope you get to go on that long bike ride tonite with Vinay by the fields of Ghatkopar :-)

*a big bear hug* Hooy MN,
Heppy Heppy Birthday deeee....Will call ya tonite where we can have looong talk about how you spent EVERY single moment of your day ;-)

Dear God,

Grant them both whatever they want today...Kootti kazhichu paarunga, kanakku seriyaa varum...

Love,
Me

!*&^%$ #@#%&^&

2005-04-15T15:55:00.000+06:00

Hey, the following post will contain profanity so KIDS / GOOD GIRLS / GOOD BOYS stricktly not allowed beyond this line.

I tried countin' till 100...I tried to smile and try one more time... I tried not to cusss.. I tried to look at my GFs foto and regain control.. I tried to recite "Asotoma Satyamaya...(screw u Saran) I tried every damn fucking thing in this planet....It still didn't work.. Finally called for help....

I am soooooooooooooo blooody pissed nowwwww...so much so that I feel totally fucked up... Not F&^%ed up but FUCKED up... wasted 1.5 fuckin' hours trying to get my post in shape... simply because I don't like shoddy work... whoever the fuck invented HTML can go shove it up his / her ass... IT FUCKIN SUCKSSSSSSSSSSSSS....why can't somebody invent a language which is easy enougH for even doofus' like me to grasp...FUCK HTML....FUCK THIS BLOG...N YEAH, A BIG MIDDLE FINGER FOR ALL THOSE STUPID QUIZZES....I QUIT !!

Testing times...

2005-04-15T12:21:00.000+06:00

...are here again....Bosses are on business travel...There is so much work and it doesn't help when Murphy has decided that its the perfect time to pay you that quarterly visit...An irate customer, a comp that crashes whenever I open a doc > 4MB, a VoIP fone whose ringtone and volume gets mysteriously reset every night, a coffee vending machine that's totally conked off...Life is back to normalcy. Neway no more cribbing...In the absence of anything interesting to write (I do NOT lie remember) here are a few tests that have been giving me sleepless nights and a million rounds of honest soul searching... Ensoii !!

Finally tests which speaks the truth - the whole and the absolute truth :-)))

Number One

Which Mix of the Hogwarts Houses are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

You're a Slytherpuff!: This is a rare combination but those that are true Slytherpuffs are not people you want to make your enemy. You take loyalty very seriously and if someone gives you their word you expect them to keep it. You either project a cold exterior and have a heart of gold inside or you seem all cuddly and nice on the outside and you are ruthless on the inside. People frequently underestimate you but this usually suits your purpose. Whoever has your loyalty is a very lucky person because you will fight tooth and nail to protect them. You have a protective streak and you like to champion the underdog. In life, experience has taught you that it's better not to be too idealistic or expect to much of other people. Still, deep inside you, you still have hope that everything will always turn out for the best. Your weakness is that sometimes you trust blindly, follow without question and this can lead you into trouble. With the loyalty of a Hufflepuff and the ruthlessness of a Slytherin you are a formidable person!

Number Two
Movie Recommendation.
created with QuizFarm.com

You scored as Romantic Comedy. What the fuck? You scored Romantic Comedy. You love sappy shit. You're oblivious to what's happening as long as you have some guy for eye candy and a happy ending you wish you could happen in your own life. Time to rent some new movies.

Romantic Comedy 75%
Mindfuck 70%
Sadistic Humour 65%
Artistic 60%
Drama/Suspense 50%
Mindless Action Flick 40%
Sci-Fi/Fantasy 15%

Number Three

What sign of the Zodiac are you meant for?
created with QuizFarm.com

For Pisceans
You scored as Pisces. You get along best with the sign of Pisces. Although Pisceans can be very withdrawn, or hard to understand, they are extremely conscious individuals, and are very deep as well. Pisceans often have a very dry sense of humor. They are very mature (after all, they are the 'ELDERS of the Zodiac'), and are freakishly good at percieving the world around them, practically to the point of being 'psychic.' Few can understand the depths of these people, but the few who can remain close friends with Pisceans for a long time.

Gemini 85%
Pisces 85%
Sagittarius 80%
Aquarius 70%
Scorpio 70%
Cancer 65%
Capricorn 50%
Aries 50%
Libra 45%
Leo 45%
Taurus 40%
Virgo 30%

Zee, are you listening ? ;-)

Number Four

How much do you match your zodiac sign?

You are 67 % Pisces

Number Five
What Is Your Seduction Style?

Your Seduction Style: The Coquette

You are a pro at playing the age old game of hard to get.Your flirting style runs hot and cold, giving just enough to keep them chasing you. Independent and self-sufficient, you don't need any one person to make you compelte. And that independence is exactly what makes people pursue you.

Creativity and SP - Part 2

2005-04-13T14:02:00.000+06:00

An evening in Barista
One of the greatest things about the Marketing course at SP was the fact that we got to do most of our assignments on the field. Needless to say, the pedagogy tended to place a lot of emphasis on 'Group work' but ground realities often offered a stark contrast to the Utopian principles under which the course was framed the way it was. Luckily for me, I was fortunate to be part of one of the best groups amongst our batch. To say that we were diverse would be an understatement since we had a fresher from IIT (Varun), a commerce grad (Koki), two experienced software engineers(Rags and I) and a masters in Business Economics (Shivam). Unlike a lot of the other groups, we were extremely clear from the very beginning that we would not waste our energies trying to pitch in for every assignment and would identify two owners, either by choice or by draw of lots, to take up responsibility for each subject.

Every wannabe marketeer knows that the key to success in the market is to understand Consumer Behavior and so when the first big assignment was a trip to Barista to observe a couple and report the findings, Rags and I jumped at the chance despite the fact that we had not chosen to own this particular subject. The initial enthusiasm was soon replaced by laziness and it wasn't till the day before the assignement was due that we realised we had a job at hand. Unfortunately most of the other groups had also not started on the assignment and so what happened was that the entire batch ended up flocking to the 2 Baristas in Juhu and Lokhandwala at almost the same time leaving little room for 'actual customers' to come in and be observed under the lens. By now, Rags and I had lost all interest and would have dearly handed it back to Koki and Varun if not for the verbal lashing we got from her. Bless her sweet soul :-) So dinner done, the three of us left for Juhu (she refused to trust us to do the outing by ourselves...In fact, she was right.. we had actually planned to cook it up..) at around half past nine leaving us with a little under two hours before curfew.

Once we reached Juhu, we weren't surprised to see two other groups already sitting there with the guys ogling at the half naked women and the gal-in-the-group desperately trying to get them to focus on the academic assignment. We ordered a couple of drinks, observed two sets of couples for an hour, got bored and returned to the hostel promising to send the final presentation to Koki by 7 am the next day so that she could review it before we presented it at 9 am. Once we were back in the hostel, Rags and I returned to our favorite pastimes - him watching TV and me chatting on IP. Koki employed a few spies from BH to report to her on the progress of our work but thankfully we identified the etappans and passed on doctored info across the great divide. Finally at around 1 in the morning, when Rags and I finally got down to work with piping hot chai and maggi to give us company, we knew we had to race against time. The first decision we took was to avoid the usual, boring form of presentations. Knowing that we had to strike a fine balance between being different and still fulfilling the requirements of the assignment, we were pondering over the possibility of presenting it as a story when Rags came up with this brainwave of using poetry to spin a story around our evening's observations (...and if ever there was an Archimedes Eureka moment in my life, it was this) The easier part of ideation done, we knew the real challenge was in the implementation phase. We decided to have 7 slides of 2 paras each with every para having 4 lines. As I rattled off on what needed to be covered, Rags spun his magic web of words. There were moments when we were totally stuck forcing us to take a 10 mt break to the TV room and then one of us would have a wild thought and we would rush back to see if we could fit it into the flow. Of course, there were numerous arguments and I played critic to the hilt knowing that Rags loved challenges and would deliver if only he was pushed properly. Whenever Americanisms filtered in, I mercilessly edited it forcing Rags to alter his style.

I have always been of the opinion that when you aren't entirely convinced about a particular idea and still have to take it up, the end product invariably turns out to be very shoddy. At the same, when you believe in whatever you are doing and set your heart and soul to it, the results speak for themselves. After 3 hours of blood and toil when we saw the final product we were thrilled with the output. But there was still something that seemed to be missing. The verses were wonderful but we knew we did not want to speak those lines. It was then that I casually suggested that maybe we should just put it in Auto Mode and do no talking. This suggestion sparked off a new train of thought and we finally settled on playing some music in the background and letting people follow the story through the slides. Of course, we chose Kenny G (don't remember which song now) for there is nothing more soothing that a sax playing in the background.

When we showed our presentation to Koki the next day, she broke into a huge smiling acknowledging that we had a sure winner on our hands but the dark circles around her eyes clearly told its own story - she hadn't slept much the previous night ;-) I would not be far off from the truth if I said that the class was stunned by our presentation and the Prof went delirious with joy. Rags was given a long round of applause (which was totally due) and specifically commended for his classy British sense of writing (for which I knew I deserved equal credit if not more). There is nothing more toxic than the praise that one gets from peers and I would have definitely understood if Rags had forgetten to acknowledge my contribution (however small) except that he did not. (In his own crazy way, he silently hugged me in private later than day :-p) As I keep saying, the Calcutta Test made a super star of Laxman but I am sure he would have been the first to appreciate the value of Dravid's knock. Sometimes we need to be a little less skeptic about team work coz, trust me, it works.

Dear God,

This song's been buzzing in my ears since morning and I know everyone runs when I sing but then, you don't have a choice....so here I go..

Some find it sharing every morning
Some in their solitary lives
You’ll find it in the world of others
A simple line can make you laugh or cry

You’ll find it in the deepest friendship
The kind u cherish all ur life
And when u know how much that means
You’ve found that special thing
Ur flying........

Missing her like crazyyyyyyyyyyyyy :-((((((((((

Love,
Me

Creativity and SP - Part 1

2005-04-12T19:29:00.000+06:00

A couple of weeks back, I'd had the fortune of meeting one of my colleague's brother who worked for one of the Big Five. The problem with me is that when I disregard something/someone, I can barely manage to hide my contempt...Ditto with consultancy careers and IIMA grads who work in these outfits doing nothing but producing global gas...This particular meeting, which I hadn't exactly been looking forward to, thankfully set right a few of my biases and prejudices regarding the 'morons who worked there'. For half an hour Vignesh regaled me with stories of life at B school, the first job from campus, the accidental switch to consultancy, the goof-ups and gaffes of the first 6 months and how he had settled down slowly putting me at ease and actually convincing me that these guys weren't all nerds or jerks ;-)

After some more bonding, he casually mentioned that he had flown down to meet up with one of the summer trainees assigned to him and brief her about the forthcoming summer project. One thing led to another and we were soon discussing profiles, brochures and selection procedures when I started probing Vig into giving details about how exactly did companies decide on shortlisting people based on whatever little info was given out in the brochure. Surprisingly, he remarked that on most occasions while past pedigree certainly carried weight (read: studied in IIT / Stephens and worked abroad) what was more important was to present something that reflected your personality best, anything that made you stand out from the crowd, so that it would atleast give you a chance to make an impression in the next round. While this clearly appeared common sensical, I was in for a rude shock when I saw some of the write ups he showed me. While most of them mentioned something or the other about their academic achievements (ranging from NTSE in std 10 to best outgoing student to College Merit scholarships) very few seemed to think of it as an opportunity to sell themselves creatively.

It was then that curiosity took the better of me and I mentioned that at SP, the way we had done it was to have a common template for academic and work experience history and use the actual write up to present an insight into one's personality. He appeared to concur with me that it made more sense that way and asked if he could see our batch's brochure (of course, in between I had boasted a lot about how our batch was different and whacky and rocked and blah blah...) Today I received a reply where he has identified the 5 write ups which definitely intrigued him with a remark that he was very impressed in general with the quality of our Marketing batch...

Note: I know some of my batch mates might also be reading this and I don't want this post to take political overtones so I'll let it be known beforehand that I masked the names of the people before sending it to him ;-)

Here are the 'chosen ones' with Vig's comments laced in between, in the same order in which I received it:

"The impossible is often the untried" says India's representative at the ISC Symposium, Switzerland. Optimism & Confidence strengthen him. English literature, Poetry, Formula1 capture his imagination.

Classy write up. The best of the lot. I can almost imagine his personality - strong, decisive, ambitious. There is something about this guy that makes the reader of his profile sit up and notice. The only negative thing I can say is that he tries too hard to sell himself. He's used the 25 word limit and more too. Notice the & instead of 'and' so that he can bring that Switzerland angle ;)

Aspiring CEO and novelist. Sports, quizzing and literary enthusiast.

Brevity is the essence of life. Though the word limit was 25, this guy knew what he wanted to project about himself. His interests are, to put very mildly, extremely diverse.

With a desire to change the world, question conventions and redefine traditions, Amit is a go-getter looking forward to new challenges.

Might sound like a lot of mother-good statements but clearly shows a flair for the language which will help him in a consultancy career.

Dares to 'Dream Big' and believes that one who dreams most, does most. His interests range from trekking, script-writing, volunteering for NGOs to quizzing.

Very different opening. With B-schools full of ruthless go-getters (I do not need to look beyond the first person in the list) this dreamer comes across as a refreshing option. His interests seem to mirror his personality as well.

An IIT graduate with a natural flair for marketing. Believes that life and market opportunities lie in the villages. His interests include swimming and badminton.

This guy means business. Look at his guts - ready to stick his neck out on opportunities in rural India. Maybe has something to do with his background but I'd definitely have a look at this profile though he would not fit into a consultancy role.

Besides the above 5, I thought this one came pretty close too if it weren't for the fact that I am biased against Bengolis.

From extempore, skits, copywriting to classical music: Aunindo is in love with creative pursuits. Hardworking guy, likes saying "I'm ready todirty my hands!!"

Now, Now...I am sure this made someone's day...Wotsay ;-)

Forget Love, spare some time for this movie

2005-04-11T17:19:00.000+06:00

What happens when our dashing, manly hero - the son of the Indian ambassador in Russia - meets a sweet yet naive schoolgirl who's immediate concern is to pass the impending Geography Exam... Hormones are on fire, sparks fly, parents oppose, chemistry leads to biology, religion and an evil uncle add to the confusion, an elopement happens followed by some rona dhona and the final get-together ? Nopes..All this is typical of the B grade Bollywood stuff churned out by down-on-their-luck producers but when it is a home production of the hero and backed by a prestigious music company, then what you get is
exotic locales, candy floss romance, eye popping visuals, mellifluous music, oh-so-cute scenes and a all-is-well-that-ends-well climax. Story ? Who cares ? ...and if you are still wondering if that is enough to pull audiences in, then just attach a tagline to the movie name and make it sound so mysterious and alluring...Lucky: No time for Love....Hullo ??

So why should you be seeing LUCKY

* Arre yaar, aren't you sick and tired of New Zealand and Switzerland ? Lush green fields, flowers, snow clad peaks.....Trust me, Russia looks fresh...icy blue lakes, falling snow, palaces, few Caucasian chicks...

* For a duo whose earlier claim to fame was directing Not-to-be-seen-with-family remix videos, Radhika Rao and Vinay Sapru do a fine job with their first attempt on celluloid. Though the screenplay could have been tighter in the second half, the duo show a flair for humour and romance not seen offlate in new directors. For me, the scene where Sallu asks Sneha about her boyfriend has to go down as one of the best I've seen in recent times (Yeah, hang me)

* After HDDCS, Sallu is back in top form playing yet another breezy, romantic role...He reminds me so much of that Tamil hero Karthik...Extremely under-rated !! If you loved those monologues Sallu has with his dead father in HDDCS, you'll love his incessant chatter with Peter, the statue in Moscow's cemetery...and those 2 reels starting from the escapade near the checkpost to that first night spent together in the Volkswagen are absolutely delightful..These are scenes when you cannot but marvel at Sallu's non-chalant sense of humor and timing in comedy.

* Sneha Ullal might appear to be a carbon copy of that beautiful mannequin Ms Rai but there is no denying the fact that the lassie can emote. LUCKilY for her, she gets to play a role that is easily as close as it will ever get to being herself. Secondly, realising the pitfalls of delivering an over the top performance (especially when you are portaying a gawky teenager) Sneha displays commendable restraint in more than a few sequences. Mark my words, this gal will go places. And hey, we don't even have to put up with stupid giggling and that absolutely dumb look a la Ms Plastic. Btw, Snehal Ullal is absolutely drooolable...Made me wish I were 21...sigh.....Of course, even a jenny looks like a Goddess @ 18 but...;-)

* The music by Adnaan Sami easily fits into the mood of the movie though the placement of the songs, especially in the second half, leaves a lot to be desired. All the songs are well picturised though my personal favorites are 'Shayad yehi tho pyaar hai' and 'Jaan Meri Jaa'. We paid a princely sum of Rs 150 for 3 balcony tickets and got our money's worth in the first fifteen minutes itself...And needless to say, everyone who was sitting in our hall was up on his feet jiving to....

hai rama rama ho
hai ho rama
dil main macha hai kyon
koi hungama
aayega koi
bahoan main leke
chumega mere
yeh lucky lips

(and that cute hand rotating routine...giggle...)

Absolutely rollicking track !! Zimbly loved it in the movie !!

Of course there are quite a few reasons why the movie is not-so-perfect especially with the script going haywire in the second half and Mithun-da's highly forgettable performance but as Kamal says in Pammal K Sambandam, sometimes you should not 'dissect', you must just sit back and ensoiiii !!!

ps: In Case I forgot to mention, Sallu does NOT take off his tee / shirt in this 16 reel flick...Now isn't that something ?

Dear God,

Can we have a week without Mondays ? Plssss ?

Love,
Me

More Movie Magic

2005-04-08T10:42:00.000+06:00

Everytime I watch a QT movie, the three things that come to my attention as strokes of sheer genius are
a. the immense amount of cross referencing sometimes to his own works
b. the sheer recklessness employed in the story telling
c. mad cap humour

Had an hour to spare yesterday evening and thought I would catch up a little with Kill Bill Vol 1...and here are a few more ovbservations...

# 1
Vernita Green does not like her codename Copperhead, the same way as Mr.Pink in Reservoir Dogs.

# 2
Even though The Bride's name is bleeped out in Vol 1, if you concentrate hard enough, you can actually get her name when she asks for a flight ticket from El Paso to Okinawa..The attendant at the counter passes her a ticket in which her name is written.

#3
Pulp Fiction, for all the criticism that it was gory and violent, had only 7 or 8 deaths. Kill Bill 1 has atleast 75 including a minimum of 50 in the restaurant showdown.

#4
No other film maker but QT would have dared to shoot something like that "Wiggle your big toe" scene and spend a good part of a minute and a half focusing on a not-so-interesting part of The Bride's anatomy...

Bow my head to Thee, My Lord !!

Btw, if Time permits and you are a PF fan, take this quiz here to find out which character you are :-)

I am Marcellus Wallace and my name alone strikes fear into others

*roars aloud*

Other movie recommends:
Socha Na Tha - 3/5
Hotel Rwanda - 6/5 (yeah)
Hostage - 2.5/5
Be Cool - 3/5 *
* revised rating since the print I saw in the theatres had 15 mts of extra footage which my thiruttu VCD didn't have...

Dear God,

A detailed 500 word movie review which is expected to toe the official line of the Sunday reviewer will then be compressed into a 20 word recommendation which will then appear WITHOUT my name in an obscure corner of the paper's supplement ? What sort of a sick joke is that ? Of course I don't write for name/ fame rather for pleasure but there's something called self respect...Besides the 300 bucks on offer would not even cover the DVD costs, dammit...

Pls get these miserly media houses to spend a little more.

Love,
Me

Sollamal Thottu...

2005-04-07T14:08:00.000+06:00

Sollaamal thottu sellum thendral
En kaadhal dhaevadhaiyin kangal
Nenjathil kotti sellum minnal
Kannoaram minnum aval kaadhal
Oru naalaikkullae mella mella
Un mounam ennai kolla kolla
Indha kaadhalinaal kaatril parakkum kaagidham aanaen

Sollaamal thottu...

Oah.....kaadhalin avasthai edhirikkum vaendaam
Naraga sugham allava
Neruppai vizhungi vittaen.... oah...
Amilam arundhivittaen
Noayaay nenjil nee nuzhaindhaay
Marundhai yaenadi thara marandhaay
Vaalibathin soalaiyilae
Ragasiyamaay poo parithaval needhaanae

Sollaamal thottu...

Yeh....pengalin ullam padu kuzhi enbaen
Vizhundhu ezhundhavan yaar? (Hear Hear Hear)
Aazham alandhavan yaar?.......oah
Karaiyai kadandhavan yaar?
Kaadhal irukkum bayathinil dhaan
Kadavul boomikku varuvadhillai
Meeri avan boomi vandhaal
Thaadiyudan dhaan alaivaan veedhiyilae....

Sollaamal thottu...

courtesy : Vaali@Dheena

Dear God,

You send one more very pretty chick to my floor and I'll strangle you, I swear...

Love,
Me

Very quickly....

2005-04-06T11:58:00.000+06:00

A good friend recently told me that he felt sick when people 'judged' him by what he wrote in his blog...At that instant, I remember laughing away his comment but ever since I received a couple of mails / messages which seemed to suggest that I was also under the microscopic lens, I've had mixed feelings abt this whole damn thing.....Rather than adopt the convenient thing that my friend did which was to shut down the blog or the logical thing which was to join issue by replying to those mails / messages, I think I'll be different (Yes Tom, there is my OCD resurfacing again)...I think I will come clean on all my short comings...I think I will show the world how opinionated I am...I shall seek redemption for my shallow tastes...

Here I am...
This is Me...
An MCP...
Who loves Lucky...

:-)

Dear God,

Will someone pls teach me how to score less than 8 under par in this game ? And how to get a birdie on Hole 11 ?

Love,
Me

The Ones (concluding part)

2005-04-05T09:28:00.000+06:00

Saturday, 2-4-2005, 15:49

We are way too early...
Better this way...Now you can atleast station yourself appropriately...
Station ? I am no sentry, ma'am.. Neway at 4, there is hardly going to be a crowd...
Fine Fine.. this is where we go our ways.. I sit here and you sit atleast 5 tables away and don't make yourself very obvious. Read that Mars vs Venus book if you're bored....
Baby, I've read enough Conan Doyle to do this...You chill...
Thanks precious..

Saturday, 2-4-2005, 15:56

Do we really have to run up this escalator ?
I don't want her to get the impression that I can't even come on time for a date....
Hey bhagwaan...
And don't you follow me...Let's split here...
You've gone mad.. this is not a spy thriller...
Where are you gonna be ?
Don't you fret...I know I will be able to identify Mahesh so I think I will go upstairs to PVR and observe from the third floor...
You are such a darling...

Saturday, 2-4-2005, 16:01

'Never talk on an empty stomach' said Confucius...What can I order for you, lady ?
Ahhh...Pardon...
Did I startle you ? Sorry...The name's Gopalan, Shiv Gopalan...like Bond, James Bond..
Puhleeez...You know I hate those stupid action flicks..
...But I do know that you like Paneer Parathas...and my friends tell me that Transit serves wonderful parathas.. May I ?
Yes, you may... and if i may recommend, we can have icecreams too...
Why talk of the end course when there's so much to do before we come to that...
Come on, stop talking like someone's who jumped out of a movie screen...
But I thought you liked mush...
Not as much as I love parathas.. Can you pls stop flirting and go and get us food ? I'll get the icecreams...What would you like ?
You know that...
Just checking...

Saturday, 2-4-2005, 16:07

How on earth did I let myself get conned into this stupid bodyguard exercise ? Shitttt...they are actually having food....I feel so hungry....Divya, you're a dead duck...

Saturday, 2-4-2005, 16:17

Gotcha...So you're sitting a couple of tables away, lurking behind that book and stealing glances, huh...That Tee is really cute...You jes wait, mister..You are gonna be in for a shock...I'm coming down there to your table...

Saturday, 2-4-2005, 16:18

I thought I was the foodie but you've hardly spoken anything ever since you started gobbling up those parathas...
For once, I thought I'd let you do all the talking and I'd listen...
...and why is that so ?
Since I am being judged... and probably watched too..
What do you mean by that ?
Come on, I am pretty sure Mahesh is here though I wouldn't fault you...
Hmmm...Anyway how did the Visa interview go ?
Okie dokie...
Congrats.. so when are you flying ?
You didn't deny what I said...
How long will it be ?
6 weeks...
Btw, is it true ? That Confucius quote...
Of course not, I was joking..
So typical of you...
..and what is that supposed to mean ?
Forget it..
There you go again...You start something and you leave me midstream.. I just hate this Divya..You know how I feel about this whole damn thing..
Okie..I am sorry.. Maybe I have carried this secrecy thing a little too far...The truth is I wasn't sure.....about us....

Saturday, 2-4-2005, 16:20

So you're Mahesh, huh ?
Excuse me...
Why don't you just let those two love birds be..I suggest we take a stroll outside and come back after 15 minutes...
Hullo, do we know each other...
Maybe.. Maybe not.. But I definitely know Shiv and you know Divya and I assume, by now, we both know why we are here..
I can't believe it...Don't tell me..
Then don't bother asking...
So do you have a name ?
The real one or the one you'd know me by...
Do you always speak in riddles ?
But I thought you liked 'em riddles...
I am waiting..
I'm Priyadhashini...My friends call me Pri...
Priyadharshini, I still don't understand how you could know me..
So how's the tennis going these days ?
This is the craziest conversation I've had for years...
...and how many of these were with very pretty women ?
Jesus Christ...
Tell me Mahesh, have you understood why Merseyside derbies are the most passionate encounters in English football ?
..that's coz of history behind the tie..In the late 1890s Everton and Liverpool both shared Anfield and then a rent dispute happened...and Evertonians moved to Goodison...wait.....why are we even discussing this ?
...but I've never seen it get violent..like say the Madrid clash...
So you watch football huh ?
Who do you think will die in HP6 ? You've ordered your copy ?
Nopes... and I sure hope it is that old bore Dumbledore...

Saturday, 2-4-2005, 16:27

So are you're telling me, he is actually sitting somewhere behind waiting to come to your 'rescue' if need be...
He was... till some girl just led him out...
He must be one helluva pal...
Hehehe..you make that sound funny but yes...He's a real darling...You were jealous of him, weren't you...
Naah...btw, did u say a girl just led him out...Omigawd...
Why ? What happened ?
I think I better explain...

Saturday, 2-4-2005, 16:30

We've now had bits and pieces of what can be loosely defined as conversation on 5 different topics...I don't understand this at all...Are you trying to unnerve me ?
Do you feel intimidated ?
By what ?
...by the fact that you might have met your so called "intellectual match" ?
Wait.... why do u use that particular phrase ? Are you someone from my blog ?
..or maybe you are nervous in front of a smart, pretty woman...
Of course not...
I am not pretty ?
I didn't mean that...
So I am not smart ?
I was referring to the nervous part...
So you agree that I am pretty and smart...
I'd be lying if I denied it..
Good..we are making progress..
...towards what ?
Are you single ?
Waitttttttt... how can you ask that ?
That was a simple question... All I needed was a Yes or a No ?
Its not as simple as that....
So is Pete Sampras the greatest tennis player you've seen ?
Yes
See, every question can have a simple answer - a Yes or a No.
Excuse me but I think I have to make a call...

Saturday, 2-4-2005, 16:32

...I am sure Pri would have scared the hell outta him by now...
So you think she'll do it..
Of course.. she's a tigress.. when she wants something, she will get it.. By hook or by crook...
Let's see...
So why hasn't he called by now ?
Patience..and watch the fun unfold

TRING TRING TRING

Yeah Mahesh, we are here at the Transit, second floor. Can you come up here directly...Have you booked tickets for the movie, darling ? Great...Bye... Love you...
Poor guy.. this is not fair Divya...

Saturday, 2-4-2005, 16:32

Sorry..Divya just called.. I need to go..
Btw, how tall do you think I am ?
5'10" ?
5'11" actually...and remember Sharon Stone, Scott Adams, you and I have something in common...
Omigawd... You're the KrankyKrook who comments on my blog ?
Hahaha..Yeah, I'm THE ONE ..You catch on slow...
Damnnnnnnnn you Pri... I just have to go...
Let me also join you...Shiv and I have to pack off too...

Saturday, 2-4-2005, 16:36

Hi Darling...Shiv, meet Mahesh my boyfriend.. Mahesh, this is Shiv...
Hi Mahesh.. I see that you have already met my friend Priyadharshini so I don't need to introduce you two...Divya was just telling me about how today is your first anniversary and how you've planned to celebrate by watching a movie... Congrats dude.. You are a lucky guy....When is the wedding happening ?
Yeah... yeah...Not decided yet but will happen soon....
Mahesh, why are you wriggling away..Feeling very shy, aren't you ? Sorry Shiv but he doesn't talk much with strangers...
So Mahesh, did Pri bore you a lot with her staccato talk ?
Not fair Shiv...
No... she was quite charming...
Hahaha.. How dare you tell that in front of your girlfriend, dodo...
Sorry Divya..I hope Pri didn't mind...
Of course not.. Mahesh was a perfect gentleman...

Saturday, 2-4-2005, 16:48

I think Pri and I need to move.. Don't want to spoil your plans.. Have a nice evening, Divya.. and you too Mahesh..
Bye Shiv and thanks for dropping by..
Bye Pri...
Bye Mahesh...

Saturday, 2-4-2005, 16:51

You still exchanged gifts ?
Let's see what he has gifted me...Goshhhhhhhhh...
Kyuuun.. Kya hua....
Love in the time of cholera....
Good book...
No useless..I got him the same book....
Serendipity...both ways...
Yeah....
Its such a pity that you didn't like him.....and did you really have to be so loud abt the fact that I am supposed to be your boyfriend...
Why ? You have designs on Pri ?
Hmmmm...
Okie... time for surprises....Here is something for you...
98802 92214...What is this ?
Pri's number ?
But she thinks I am your boyfriend...
Hahahahaha... Belated April fool's day precious....Shiv and I got you, didn't we....
You mean..................
Yes............
and does she....
Of course she does... she's probably waiting for the call...
Excuse me....

Saturday, 2-4-2005, 16:54

Hello....
I almost thought you wouldn't call...
Do you have to fly tomorrow pleaseeeeeeeeee?
Yes.. but don't we have the whole of tomorrow, loser....
I love ya...
Me tooo.....

The Ones

2005-04-04T20:36:00.000+06:00

Thursday, 31-3-2005, 21:44

Hello Pri... How are you ?
Don't tell me you called to say you are not coming
Illadi... I AM leaving tomorrow... I just need a favor from you...
Shoot
I have a date on Saturday evening at The Forum...So can we start early and round up your shopping by 4 ?
Divya ?
Yeah...and I need you to come along too...
Why would I want to be kabaab-mein-haddi ?
Coz there is something in it for you tooo..
Is it ?
Don't be nasty dee...Mahesh is coming..
Ohhhh...
I am not joking...She told me she'll be there alone but I kinda suspect she will bring him along...Besides I am still not convinced they are just good...
Stop it kiddo. You just don't understand women. Take it from me, there is nothing happening between them.
How can you be so sure ?
Woman's instinct
Now that is not something I can dispute, can I ?
Neway what do you want me to do ?
I have a gut feeling he will there spying on me so if you can also do the same for me, I'd be grateful...
This is so juvenile...
But you will do it, nuh ?
Ufff...seri...And you better get her something esp: since this is the first time you guys are meeting...I already have...

Friday, 1-4-2005, 19:22

TN011011: So you won't tell me if the latest story in autobiographical...
Kyootgal: I don't know myself
TN011011: C'mon, I wasn't born yesterday
Kyootgal: Have you considered the possibility of giving me the benefit of doubt once in a while...
TN011011: ...it has to be...if its not experential, you can't write the way he does...
Kyootgal: If you know the answer yourself, why ask me ?
TN011011: Coz I like it straight from the horse's mouth
Kyootgal: There we go fighting again :-(
TN011011: OK OK lets chill now...After all, we have all the time on Saturday evening...
Kyootgal: Excuse me...
TN011011: Didn't I tell ya ? shucks...sorry baba... I am coming to Bangalore this weekend...
Kyootgal: Hmm Hmm
TN011011: ...one of my friends, Pri, is going onsite and I am there to see her off...
Kyootgal: Okay...
TN011011: So can we meet ?
Kyootgal: This is such short notice. I will need to check.
TN011011: With Mahesh ? C'mon, haven't we put this off for too long now..
Kyootgal: Hmmm..
TN011011: If you don't want to catch up, I shan't insist. Forget it then.
Kyootgal: No No..not that way... fine....when and where do you propose that we meet up?
TN011011: Pri needs to shop so can we make it 4 pm at the Transit Lounge - that food place - in the second floor at Forum ?
Kyootgal: Fine with me..I hope you won't mind if I am a couple of minutes late...
TN011011: As long as you are alone and don't come with your aunt or someone...
Kyootgal: You mean Mahesh, don't you ?
TN011011: Grrrr...yeah....
Kyootgal: Relaxxxxxxx Shiv
TN011011: ...and how will I recognise ya ?
Kyootgal: You will, if your claim that you know me well is true ;-)
TN011011: I will call you if I don't think I see you around..ta ta
Kyootgal: C U

So what do you think ?
Hmmm...I thought I'd lost all hope about you and men but looks like you've finally met Mr. Perfect...When did all this happen ?
Yesterday....and its nothing like what you are romanticising re...just that this guy is a little different...
Aren't we all ? Got to give him credit though..Atleast his comments on my blog are profound...
Shuddup....Stop teasing him...
So you're going out on a date, huh ? Best of Luck...
Not you but we....
Hellooooooo...
I need your help, Mahesh...See, I know Shiv's nice and cool and genuinely funny et al but sometimes online personalities are so different from the true self..
So you're saying he could be anything from a juvenile prankster to a serial rapist or a philandering married man..
Stop kidding.. I've spoken to him...he's nothing of that sort...Its just that I want to protect myself on all fronts... What if he doesn't turn out to be the way I've imagined him to be.... what if he is a sily geek, a snobbish MBA or worse still a garrulous tennis player...
Heyyyyy....So...where do I fit in ?
Here's what I want you to do...Just tag along but do not come with me to my seat..... Sit far away in the Lounge and keep watch...Give me 30 minutes with the guy and then call up... If I don't take the call, then I'm fine...If I take it, then it means I need you to save me...
Isn't that kinda sneaky ?
Hear me out, please...And when you come in, I want you to act as if you are my boyfriend...Shiv already suspects and that will make it easier for me to get out of the mess anyway...
This ain't fair..I am not doing anything of this sort...
Waitt... lemme open the red IOU book...
Oh nooooo..That's clearly blackmail...
Not at all..Acc to this, its minus 7...Thats seven you owe me...
OK OK... done...but let me place on record that I don't approve of this hare-brained scheme...
You just play along, precious....
If that's the way you want it, Divya....
Mahesh, I was just wondering..What do you think would be an appropriate gift ?
Hehehe..This is tooo much....
I am serious...Any suggestions ?
Okie.. get him something that he can remember you by but don't get him personal stuff....No clothes, no perfume etc...An impersonal item that is a reflection of your personality would be apt...
I think I get it...Nice idea...
See, we'll make a nice couple if we are both single by 40...

(To be continued)

More of 'The Great Indian Novel'

2005-04-04T13:11:00.000+06:00

The background:
Kunti is a little worried that her 5 precocious kids (...well...not all 5 are hers but then lets not get too finicky so early on...) are not learning much since every tutor in the past who had been appointed seemed to have served his purpose within a week and the wilful princes are proving to be more than a handful for the recent ones on trial.

The setting:
The princes, in the absence of anything constructive to do, are playing cricket. Bhim, being the strongest of the lot, hits a ball far away into an unused well. However the well is deep and there appears to be no way of possibly retrieving the ball. Suddenly from nowhere pops a saffron clad sadhu and offers to recover the ball for them in return for a dinner invitation. The wiser ones, Arjun and Yudhistir, are skeptical since they seem to have analysed the situation well and see no possibility of success but when the sadhu delivers on his promise, they are eager to know more about the man. The sadhu explains that he is a guru and can teach the princes a lot of things. At this point, simpleton Nakul wants to know if the sadhu can teach his twin Sahadev to bat properly since he has scored yet another zero today. The sadhu, responding to Nakul, mentions that zero is nothing to be ashamed of and then the below exchange occurs.

The lines:
'The Indian zero is no empty shell. It reflects the perpetual intangibility of the eternal, it embodies the calm centre of the whirling tornado of life, it stands for the point where our verifiable values are transcended by the enigma of the void. Yes, young man, it is empty of numerical value. But it is full of non-empirical possibilities. It is nothing and everything; it is the locus of the universe.' He chuckled at the puzzlement on the twins' faces, even as he took in the sharper look of insight that had appeared in Arjun's and Yudhistir's eyes. 'Now, do you see, my friends, why your zero is really something very special, very Indian ?'

'But can you teach him to bat?' asked Nakul, as his elder brothers burst out laughing.

'Perhaps,' side-stepped the sage. 'But first, what about that dinner?'

Why is it that I keep thinking that Bhim is Sehwag, Arjun and Yudhistir are Dravid and Sachin respectively and Nakul is Laxman and Sahadev is, obviously, Ganguly. Kunti seems too similar to the Selectors and the past gurus our numerous bowling, batting and fielding coaches. Now who is the sadhu (Drona acc to the story) you may ask...Geoffrey Boycott, neone ?

Dear God,

Two of my very close buddies start their summers in London and Mumbai today. I am not gonna make stupid prayers like asking you to grant them a PPO (the way someone screwed my happiness....hehe..) - jes give them what they want...and if they don't know what they want, jes remember to be there for them when they need ya...

Love,
Me

ps: Iacross, I've kept my end of the bargain...Now you keep yours...Go watch Chelsea play and support them on April 16th...

What an adline !!!

2005-04-02T13:20:00.001+06:00

This has to be one of the best adlines I have seen for a looong loong time and just reinforces my belief that the Indian advertising industry has finally come of age.

BRAVO !!

Thanks to Johnny from Chennai for sharing this with me.

Love Actually....acc to Tam Brahms

2005-04-02T12:51:00.000+06:00

Act 1
Me: So Thatha, what do you think about love ?
Mani Thatha: Ennada, yaaravudhu ponnu kinnoda kaadhal aagi pocha ?
Me: No Thatha..Chumma, I am doing a series of articles on Tam Brahms and I thought I would start off with the purest of all samples
Mani Thatha: Ennavo, I don't quite trust you
Me: Please...Now tell me about love
Mani Thatha: What about it ? There's nothing new in this...Its been there throughout the ages and will continue to remain so...
Me: Baaah...no philosophy please...Tell me something nice and groovy...
Mani Thatha: When I got married in 1942....
Me: Ahhh...1942: A love story
Mani Thatha: Seriyaana cinema kaaran da nee...And wasn't Manisha beautiful in that picture ?
Me: Ayyyoo.. we are getting diverted again..
Mani Thatha: Yeah...we were a huge joint family and I was the fourth son...So when my father went to seek an alliance for me to your Paatti's house, I didn't go alongwith them. Appa and my periya Anna went and finalised the whole deal. I met my bride-to-be just 3 days before our wedding
Me: Realllyyy...
Mani Thatha: Venumna Paattiya kelaen
Me: Paatti, nejama ?
Sundari Paatti: Yes da..
Me: ...and was there any love in the whole thing ?
Sundari Paatti: Love'nnu solla mudiyaadhu... but there was something..
Me: Hehehehehe...Now this is interesting...
Sundari Paatti: In their house, everything was run by his father. My maamnaar was a strict disciplinarian but a very caring soul. In my parents' house I remember we used to watch new movies every Friday. When I came into this house, my first concern was whether I could continue with that. When I asked your Thatha about it in the first weekend, he remarked that they had never seen movies in their house but insisted that he would seek the consent of his father...
Me: Waaah Waaah... Thatha, kalakreenga ponga
Mani Thatha: Full story keluda
Me: ok ok.. the suspense is killing me...
Sundari Paatti: The next month when the salary came, your Thatha as usual took it straight to his father...it was a joint family, remember... and then humbly requested that some provision be made in the budget for taking his newly wed wife to the touring talkies...
Me: Oooooooh
Sundari Paatti: You know what was the best thing about it...I later learnt from his elder brother, remember that silent old man you met the last time you had come here, that in all his 22 years till then, your Thatha had never ever asked his father anything....
Me: Omigawddddd
Mani Thatha: Unmai da
Me: Then ?
Sundari Paatti: Of course the request got sanctioned...We went out for a movie and we even had tiffin at Subramaniams on the way back. You can say that it was on that day that I knew he truly loved me
Me: Paattti, soooooooooooper...Btw, were you educated ? English ellam pesrel neengo...
Sundari Paatti: Even that your Thatha only taught me.. but that story when you come to our house next time....
Me: Noooooooooooooooo

Act 2
Me: Uncle, what do you think about love marriages ?
Vishwa uncle: These days Love is extremely over-rated...And all this is because of the hype in the movies...
Me: But still....
Vishwa Uncle: In our days it used to be much simpler
Kala Aunty: Don't ask him... Ask me
Me: You tell me then, Aunty...
Kala Aunty: Love is extremely important for any marriage to work..sometimes you get lucky by falling in love before marriage and tying the knot with that person...soemtimes it happens after marriage...
Me: and if its not too personal, how was it in your case Aunty ?
T: I'll answer that...I have heard this story so many times..
Me: Batao tho sahi
T: It seems to ponnu paarthify, a huge pattalam turned up from Dad's side.. almost 20 odd people...
Me: Hahahaha... the usual... the 70s were like that nuh...
T: and then Mom was asked to serve coffee and snacks to everyone
Me: Okie... the usual again...
T: and it seems she was so nervous that evening coz the bajjis has turned out a little too kaaram...
Me: Hahahahahahhaha
T: Don't interrupt R
Me: Ok ok
T: ...that she hardly had a good look at my Dad at all for she kept fearing that someone would comment on the bajjis...
Kala Aunty: In our family, we don't mind that extra kaaram...But I had forgotten to tone it down since you can never say with visitors..
T: and then it seems Dad's family left promising to get back in a couple of days...
Me: Ohhhhhhhhh.. the usual "have to consult everyone" line
T: Yeah... and it seems Mom's family were not really sure... until....
Me: What happened next ?
T: After everyone had left, Dad came back...It seems he had wantedly left behind his purse on the sofa, or so Mom claims, and...
Vishwa Uncle: I did nothing of the sort
Kala Aunty: Come on, why this ego after all these years...
Me: Uncle, you are so romantic
T:...And he picked up his purse and then commented to Thatha that he loved the bajjis and liked the kaaram too....
Kala Aunty: It was then that we knew it would be a yes to the proposal...
Me: ...and love ?
Kala Aunty: Of course, I thought his gesture was really sweet and I prompty fell in love with him
Me: Wowwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

Act 3
Me: Hey Tarun, do you believe in love ?
Tarun: Yes I do
Me: Then how come you got into an arranged marriage ?
Tarun: Sez who ?
Me: Wasn't it ?
Tarun: Nopes. Twas a love marriage arranged by the elders
Me: Duh ?
Tarun: Didn't you know ? We met at Univ. Everytime I borrowed a library book, I saw her name in the previous readers list. Whenever I went to the local video store, she would have rented movies which matched my tastes.
Me: So you met her, asked her out and stuff like that ?
Tarun: Nopes. I e-mailed her, we corresponded for a couple of months, got to know each other really well and when we finally met a common friend's party she told me that her folks were under pressure to get her married off..and I asked her if I could get my parents to speak with hers.. and she said "Why not"
Me: Is this how it really happened, J ?
J: Yes re. You can call it the New-Age romance..
Tarun: Or rather, a geeky love story ;-)
Me: Oh god...U guys were so bloody lucky...Did your folks consent easily ?
Tarun: Why wouldn't they ? We were both Tam Brahms...
Me: Hmmmmmmmmm

Act 4
Me: Hi Spoorthi
Spoorthi: Vinod Anna is upstairs in his room...
Me: Thank you dear...What are you doing ?
Spoorthi: I am coloring pictures in this book that Arun gave me
Me: Who's Arun ?
Vinod: Arun is her boyfriend
Me: Sssshhhh...How can you say such stuff in front of her ? She's just 9...
Vinod: Ask her
Me: Spoorthi, who is Arun ?
Spoorthi: He is my class mate. Sits in the next desk. Always gets into trouble with Martha Ma'am
Me: and why is that ?
Spoorthi: He is always making noises in class and hitting other boys
Me: Why would he do that ?
Spoorthi: Coz all the others keep teasing me about my short hair
Me: Oh hoooooooo
Spoorthi: And anna, he shares his lunchbox only with me... and also his paintbox...
Vinod: Seeee....
Me: Cha... why are you spoiling such innocent minds ?
Vinod: You just wait...Spoo, do you love Arun ?
Me: Vinoddddddddddddddd
Spoorthi: No...Arun loves me

....and then I fainted. I think I've understood perfectly how love works in Tam Brahm families.

Note: All characters are purely a figment of my imagination. Any resemblance, however remote, to any person living or dead is purely co-incidental :-)

Dear God,

Please ensure that nobody asks me any stupid questions in the comments section. Or should I just disable comments ? Hmmmmm

Love,
Me

Bang Bang Bang

2005-04-01T16:26:00.000+06:00

GOING....
(Bangs gavel once)

GOING....
(Bangs gavel again)

GONE...
(Bangs gavel one last time)

....and with this, I have lost whatever scant respect I had for some of the so-called best bloggers in India. The ridiculous depths to which they will plunge to get their eighteen nanoseconds of fame stupefies me. These sick bastards !!! No point in wasting more words on these morons !!

Neway starting today, whenever I post, I will be making one small selfish prayer to you, God. You know how I can whine, right...so you jolly well listen !!

Dear God,

I am feeling so bitter after the aforementioned incident that I think I swore too much. My tongue/mouth feels bitter. I wanna eat a yummmy 6 layered plum cake soaked in a dash of wine. And I want it NOW.....

Love,
Me

..........

2005-03-31T16:11:00.000+06:00

A year to the day....slow poison....seething rage.....shanti om shanti...some like it short, some like it long, I don't care...Iola Morton...maroon sofa.......dhoooom machaale dhoooom.... .wav......why me....quick rebound....a thuncle.....Bailamos....Herod....Friday Weddings.....war.... Tis all Sa Si's fault................choices...........12b..................Jekyll is dead, Hyde lives on....... The end: 2040:RIP

A little bit of everything....

2005-03-31T09:36:00.000+06:00

Movies:

Tango Charlie (3.5/5)
Finally a movie that does full justice to Bobby Deol's hidden potential....Thank you Mani Shankar !!

Pluses:
Slick movie with a running time of less than 2 hrs
Appropriately episodic screenplay
Well executed action sequences (a little too gory for the weaker sex)
Bobby's natural performance
Kelly Dorji

Minuses:
The glam dolls
Yet another 'method acting' performance by Devgun...its getting tiresome, dude

Mahanadigan (1/5)
My Dad's cousin had been going ga-ga about this movie for a long time calling it nothing short of Amaidhi Padai-2 for sheer nakkal so when I watched it with gargantuan expectations, I was in for a total shock

Pluses:
Namitha and Mumtaj ;-) (Is someone listening ?)

Minuses:
Rajini nakkal scenes...Thalaiva, how dare they !!
The atrocious flashback and change-of-heart of the hero
Visu Visu Visu...all contributions to his retirement fund are welcome
Everything in the movie

House of Flying Daggers (3/5) (PG)
Two prominent Oscar nominations and the irresistable Zhang Zhiyi were more than enough to persuade me to rent this Mandarin flick and have to admit that I wasn't disappointed.

Pluses:
Amazing choreography and stunts
Riveting musical score
Awesome performances by the lead trio
Two twists, one of which had me gasping for breath

Minuses:
Absolute masala with action, romance and sentiments mixed in equal measure
The first 45 minutes are a real drag

Book corner:

A story that marries rich modern history with classical Hindu myth, prose that sometimes borders on the insolent, humor that is reckless to say the least, allegories that drive your imagination wild....Utterly unputdownable but still a book that needs to be read in short spurts if not for anything but to enjoy every single word printed....For the unfortunate few (sorry PnI) who have had the misfortune of being seated besides me during those long shuttle rides from EC to K2 and from M3 to EC, when with book on one hand I've grinned like a Cheshire cat or suddenly burst into peels of laughter, I dedicate this recommendation

The Great Indian Novel by Shashi Tharoor

An absolute Tour de force...Easily the best book I have read in the last couple of years. And yes, for someone who's been pestering me for a long time on this front, there are hajaar digs about one Mr. MK Gandhi :-))

Music:

Speaking of MK Gandhi in the previous para reminded me of a long overdue reco on the music front. Yes, I am talking of the music of Bose - The Forgotten hero as some of you might have guessed. I know I have taken my own sweet time to pass judgement but this being one of ARRs non commercial albums and the fact that the music has been long-in-the-making made me give it more than the usual share of hearings before I reached my verdict. So after a good two weeks and multiple listenings, I can safely say that it is definitely not gonna be a commercial success but if you are an ARR fan who can appreciate music that is not of the season's flavor kind but more of the suit-the-screenplay type, then this is a must buy. Most of the songs are bound to easily fit into the historical context of the story and yes, there are songs for Sonu. For a more detailed review, pls chk out Ramanand's review which comes as close as it gets to my own opinion on each of the songs.

Joke of the week:

4 easy steps to cook noodles
Step 1: Boil one cup of water
Step 2: As soon as Ganguly goes for batting, put the noodles in the boiled water and put the tastemaker.
Step 3: stir till Ganguly is onfield.
Step 4: As soon as Ganguly is back in pavilion, your noodles are ready to eat.

The ------ has two faces

2005-03-30T09:33:00.000+06:00

He: What's wrong with you ?
Me: Nothing.. I am fine..Haven't been better !!
He: I don't think so...I've been getting a lot of complaints.
Me: Complaints ? From who ? Like ?
He: The usual. You haven't called people for ages
Me: I lost my charger for a week and the phone conked off
He: That's a lie
Me: The Airtel network is always crowded
He: You know that's not true
Me: Forget making calls
He: What about receiving then ? Didn't you yelp when the phone rang on Sunday evening when we were watching TV ?
Me: Pranav's call ? Hey, we spoke for 21 minutes...
He: But your first reaction before you saw it was him was "Why do ppl call me?"
Me: Hmm
He: I think you are becoming anti-social
Me: No..Definitely not. I am so extroverted its just not possible
He: Is it ? So who have you been having lunch with at office ?
Me: Errr..
He: Tell Tell
Me: well, the buggers are all away in Japan for the roadshow...
He: But that was only since last Thursday...
Me...and Tom is now not here....:-(
He: There is still Swamy and gang...
Me: But they eat at 1:45
He: and you ?
Me: 1:40 is the latest...after that you don't get all the items in the menu...
He: Bullshit....Then why not with Sat and Mandy ?
Me: Who wants to walk till T8 ?
He: Seeee...
Me: You are reading too much into this..
He: How many unanswered mails do you have in your inbox ?
Me: Not many
He: Give me a number
Me: gulpppp...76
He: ..and how many are official in this ?
Me: 3
He: Forget that... when did u last play TT ?
Me: well..Sumit's been out of station..
He: So did you call and check if he is back..
Me: But I told you nuh.. Airtel is not working
He: Did you respond to his Happy Holi sms ?
Me: No
He: Have you thanked everyone who wished you on your Birthday ?
Me: Yesssssssss
He: Sure ?
Me: Not all..there are still a couple of mails.. PC, Anjali...
He: Why not ?
Me: Chuck nuh...All this does not make me anti-social
He: Okie, have you visited Di's parents ?
Me: They are not back from Delhi
He: They have... remember they called when we were at Meet The Fockers..
Me: Yeahhhhh.. I forgot..
He: The truth is you are too lazy to go to their place..right ?
Me: Come on man.. Hebbal is almost as far as.... say... Ohio...
He: Gotcha...so why is it that u won't start the conversation on YM whenever ur pals get online..
Me: I do that...
He: Think...Ohio...
Me: Hmmmm...
He: Why do they always have to say Hiii first...
Me: You've been reading too much of this psychometry stuff
He: I am just concerned about you...
Me: Yeahhhhhhhh

...and then the phone rings... Damnnnnn...why can't I have my bloody privacy ? Its a landline number...Must be yet another of my batchmates.wanting to organise get-togethers :-( I don't think I will pick the call...I quickly dry my hands, set my slightly tousled hair back in place, smile at the face staring at me from the mirror.

Of course I am fine. Haven't been better :-)

Never stop whining....

2005-03-29T17:48:00.000+06:00

...for you never know when the Good Lord is turning his ears in your direction. That's the lesson I've learnt in the last 48 hrs :-)

Of course, cribbing is my birthright and I love indulging in it not because I am pessimistic or anything (OK would have laughed here...sigh..) but simply because it is the easiest way to let off steam. I know I've cribbed a lot about how mundane my work is and how there is absolutely no sense of fulfillment or satisfaction at the end of each day. Most often my arguments have either been brushed aside as that of a yuppie from B-skool wanting to rule the world from Day One (which I definitely am not) or the fact that everyone else is doing more or less the same meaningless crap as I am (which isn't much of a comfort) or how organisational goals need to be balanced with individual aspirations (which is absolute balderdash)

Recently I seem to have become a little more vocal and restive about the existing state of affairs so much so that I got a surprise call from the boss yesterday to discuss a possible new role. Having worked with him for 22 months, I knew I was becoming more and more indispensable (yeah...but not in a very positive way) to the BU and was reasonably confident that he was not going to offer me a totally new, plum role on a platter. There was definitely something fishy and resolving not to commit myself till I was spelt out all the details including the fine print, I dropped in to meet him. Half an hour later, the first half of the jigsaw puzzle fell in place.

1. I would become a SAM with immediate effect in addition to my current SME responsibilities. I am assured that this would and should only take 25% of my bandwidth.

(Initial reaction: So basically no 'new role' - just more work dumped)

2. I would carry a number target, namely X $

(Initial reaction: Oh yeah....finally some real action...and X seems reaonable enough for a so-called 'strategic account')

3. The account in question would be a new one, not one amongst the many that I had already followed in detail out of sheer interest.

(Initial reaction: No probs..Should be more challenging)

4. We got the account moved from Vertical A to Vertical B after a lot of wrangling which finally had to be settled thanks to the big boss himself interfering.

(Initial reaction: So that's the complication...)

Given these details, I weighed my options carefully and decided that I would have a go at it. Not that I had much of a choice considering the only other option were continued boredom or switching to a new company. (where I am reasonably sure things won't be drastically different). Since the idea was to move the account seamlessly from A to B without the customer being affected in any possible way, the boss and I met the biggies from A today morning to plan for the transition and to generally try and get some insights into the account...and that is when the second half of the puzzle fell in place.

1. When accounts move, people also move. Atleast that is the rule but this time the bloodbath had been so severe and the two parties in question so uncompromising that the final settlement had been to move the account but staff it with new people.

(Initial reaction: Whattttttttttttt...and our transition team is supposed to start off from Apr 1 and understand it all within a month ??)

2. There are 3 projects currently running which will all end by June. Taking into consideration other engagements in the pipeline where we are yet to staff people and going by current run rate, the outlook for the account is that we will fall short of our target by a good 80%

(Initial reaction: ohhhh hoooo)

3. Two of the current projects are slipping in schedule.

(Initial reaction: Atleast I am not in charge of delivery)

4. The current BDM will phase out by April 1st and a new BDM will be taking over this account.

(Initial reaction: Omigawd...a new BDM, a new SAM, a new Delivery Team serving a new Customer with new whims ...could things get worse ?)

5. The erstwhile SAM, a 16 yr experienced guy, who was so pissed with the account being moved away from A has shot off a mail to the customer thanking them for all the support in the past informing them on a personal basis that because of an organisation overhaul he will no longer be associated with them. He hasn't introduced his successor and worse still, he has completely shut the door on an official transition period. The customer has written back and needless to say the reaction has not been very comforting.

(Initial reaction: He did that ? $#!%^&* How could he ? Has he got no brains ? Without a transition, wouldn't the customer go wild ? This is really bad)

6. They are looking for a rate negotiation in April

(Initial reaction: Hahahahahaha...after all, when things are so bad, there is nothing one can do but laugh...)

When we came out of the meeting, to his credit, my boss asked me again if I was sure I wanted to take up this extra role. He also explained why he didn't want this to be my full time job since he felt it would be too tough a challenge so early on in my career. I couldn't agree more on his judgement of ground reality but also feel strongly that drastic situations need drastic measures and if ever there was a case for someone to be involved 100% in anything, here was one. I know I won't be able to convince him otherwise especially when he has decided he won't listen but its still a wonderful challenge to take up for 25% of my time. Btw, that was official...hehehe.. off the record, I think I will put in more time on this...would look great on the resume if it works out...will still make it look good if it doesn't ;-)

Of course, as it usualy happens with verbal exchanges with my boss, the best was reserved for the parting shot and after all our deliberations, when my he finally wished me luck, I coolly retorted that I would rather trust my abilities than rely on luck. The look on his face said it all. We'll see it through !!

...so there it is, my dahlings, the story of how my whining has finally been answered :-)

Women....Baaah !!

2005-03-28T17:32:00.000+06:00

Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus: A Practical Guide for Improving Communication and Getting What You Want in Your Relationships

Mars and Venus in the Bedroom : A Guide to Lasting Romance and Passion

Mars and Venus Together Forever: Relationship Skills for Lasting Love

Mars and Venus on a Date: A Guide for Navigating the 5 Stages
of Dating to Create a Loving and Lasting Relationship

Mars and Venus Starting Over: A Practical Guide for Finding Love Again After a Painful Breakup, Divorce, or the Loss of a Loved One

Men, Women and Relationships : Making Peace with the Opposite Sex

pssst: A little birdie tells me that between these 6 titles, an obscene no: of millions of copies have been sold so far. Of course, the author is male, the agent in concern is male, the publishers are all male and everyone of them is laughing all the way to their bank.

PSSST: Another birdie tells me that 83% of these books were bought by women....ROFLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL !! Women bahhhh !! Is there any hope at all for this species ? Why is it that they need help with every damn thing in their lives......

...and just when you thought that everything that had to be said on this subject had already been done so by that great gentleman John Gray, here come two other gentlemen Daniel Rosenberg and Richard Kirshenbaum (Trust guys to know that women are always sucker for anything new on this beaten-to-death topic) with their own sweet take on a field of interest which somehow seems to have not been covered as much in detail as women would have preferred....The title of this soon-to-be-bestseller goes something like

Closing the deal: From Single Miss to Wedded Bliss

In case you are wondering what exactly these two charlatans are upto then here's a hint - they will give you ten easy steps by which you can get your boyfriend to finally get down and make that elusive marriage proposal. Do I hear the feet of women barging towards the nearest store to pre-order their copy ? ;-)

(An afterthought: I've always felt that guys take a long time to decide whether they want to go steady with a gal - in woman's parlance 'to be her boyfriend' - preferring to maintain a platonic relationship till they are sure but once the decision is made, then the next step towards marriage is relatively very quick....On the other hand, women love to jump into relationships and will not think twice before calling every Tom, Dick and Harry who shows even the slightest hint of interest in them as their boyfriend but to get them to commit to a future together is so painful that more often than not, its just not worth it. In that context, I am just wondering how relevant this latest book is... but w-t-h, most of these self-help books are crap neways !!)

Stories from the stadium

2005-03-27T13:50:00.000+06:00

I am in a very crazy mood today...Got up late and found New Zealand yet again in trouble with Ponting looking ominous...And when there are two cricket matches on telly, there is not a hope in a million that Dad will give me the remote..Definitely not when Australia is involved atleast.. Not that I can't bear to watch cricket but then, three consecutive days would be an overdose so here I am in office..yeah sue me...trying to cajole myself to update my resume for the umpteenth time in the last month.

This is again gonna be a crazy post for I know I have so many stories to tell but then some of them could border on the bizarre or the boring so if you're not the regular reader who is by now used to my random ramblings, then you jolly well stop here...

Yeah.. Everyone around has been telling me that Bangalore this week has been reallly hotttt and this has more to do with the innumerable Pakistani chicks who have descended in numbers to watch their cricketing team than the weather which, incidentally, has seen the mercury level climb really high..I beg to differ..w-t-h... I holler to differ...sob sob...The only blokes who have travelled this far are the handsome but dumb Pathan youth and that omnipresent chacha...Absolutely no women....Did I hear you say "There he goes being judgemental !!" - Hear me out folks ! Saturday was a long boring day at the Chinnaswamy stadium thanks to Pakistan piling up a tonne of runs on Day 1 and looking to consolidate while Dada was clearly on the defensive seeking to minimise the damage. Of course, Younis Khan was awesome but then if you've come in with the sole intention of cheering on the Indian team, then 'cricket was the winner' is not the cliche you want to say. The lone bright spark of the day was the fact that chacha came over and danced along with the people in our stand for a good 20 mts.. and needless to say, we got our moment in the Giant screen :-) For anyone who's been following sub continent cricket for the last 10 years, the chacha is as much part of the history of the game as are the players..Sharjah, Karachi, Peshawar, Multan...name it and the chacha is there on screen at every venue...I was so tempted to take a snap with him but when I saw him mobbed by fans who were thronging to get his autograph, the EGO resurfaced and I held back ;-)

Other observations:
The Bangalore crowd is one of the most vociferous and cheerful lot you can imagine. When the chips are down, they can still retain their enthusiasm by creating a huge din with their cheering and Mexican waves. What definitely helps is if the fielder in the boundary is appreciative of the fact and also does his bit by playing to the gallery. Of all the people in the Indian team, Viru and Bhajji are the real darlings of the crowd. Sachin is tremendously respected and loved and though he is all concentration personified, once in a while he does indulge in playful banter. Balaji and Pathan are admired simply because whatever time of the day, however tiring proceedings have been they give 120%. Surprisingly, though he is a localite, one person who is not very popular with the masses is Kumble. For one, he has to be one of the most surly cricketers I have seen who seldom has a smile for the crowd or even some good words for those small kids who toil at the boundary line picking up balls that reach the boundary and replenish the tired fielders with drinks and water in between overs. I've never been a big fan of this so called 'thinking cricketer' (the way he bowled on Saturday wouldn't have got my arthritis stricken 76 yr old Grandma out) and his off-the-field attitude, of which I have heard enough stories, doesn't also say much.

After the late declaration on Friday evening and with Viru going hammer and tongs in the last 10 overs, Saturday seemed to have exciting prospects lined up. Needless to say I wasn't disappointed as the cricket was classic stuff. I shan't bother giving you details about why Sehwag is one of the kind simply because for that you can listen to verbal diarrhoea Kris Srikkanth and the Amir Khusro-wannabe Mohinder Amarnath on Fourth umpire (Does nebody find that lady anchor cute ?) I had got into the stadium late thanks to my dumb pal C and ended up getting seats which was 6 rows from the railing. Thankfully it was a blessing in disguise since we ended up befriending two Pakistani guys, Qasim and Farhan, who had come all the way from Peshawar. A good couple of hours of bonding later, Farhan mentioned that his younger brother was a good friend of Afridi and even shared some dark secrets about the dashing Pakistani all rounder. It's not in my nature to gossip (hehe) but all you pretty women who find Afridi hotttt, I'll just hint that there's some local competition for you. Anyway as the match wore on, Qasim who had come prepared with posters, crayons and wanted so desperately to come on TV since he had friends and relatives back home watching out for him, kept cribbing about how the lensmen tended to concentrate only on the pretty chicks. (I love Zaheer isn't the smartest poster I've seen...and bad taste that girl has) Feeling sorry for him, I came up with this brainwave of a suggestion to catch the cameraman's attention but then, this dumb Paki didn't buy into my idea at all. (Can I show off plsssssssssss ?) After Viru's dismissal, when things got just a tad boring, my suggestion was to put up a poster which ran something like this...

NO VIRU, NO EXCITEMENT :-(
BRING ON SANIA MIRZA :-)

..and this coupled with Qasim being a Paki (he had the flag painted on his face) was bound to have got the lensman's attention....Sigh.....

Other observations:
The next time you watch a match in a stadium, don't get yourself an expensive ticket in the fancy stands near the pavilion where the rich and the famous sit. Get yourself reasonably affordable tickets where you can be one amongst the public just to understand why cricket is religion in this country. If you're anywhere in India, watch the crowd go mad everytime Sachin walks in to bat. Trust me - You HAVE to be INSIDE to believe the frenzy. Its not the same watching it on telly. Everytime a boundary is struck by an Indian, you wouldn't be faulted if you thought the roof would fall on top of you. (Start of Digression: With so much love and adulation, I still can't believe why cricketers need to be paid to play. After all, isn't representing the nation itself such a high ? End of Digression) Another thing that amazed me was the knowledge that most of these fans had. I distinctly remember that much before Dada actually thought along the lines of asking Kumble to bowl round the sticks with 6 men on the onside, an old gentleman near me had detailed what should have been done atleast a couple of overs before with exact fielding positions that Dada should adopt to stem the flow of runs. Doff my hat to you sir.

There are many other small stories about the Bangalore test match that I could narrate but let me end it with my favorite one - yeah, one on Marketing and the entrepreneurial spirit of the Indian hawker. A cricket match is usually much more than just a game - for some its a carnival and for some its a business opportunity. The last couple of days everything from bakery biscuits, bananas, bandanas (I hope ppl don't think I have spelt the same thing twice :-P), binoculars, face paints, flags, lemon sherbeths, sugarcane juice, trumpets and whistles have been peddled by persistent vendors but the thing that impressed me most was ONE guy who sold it all under one roof, constantly checking with his supply chain over the mobile fone and ordering stuff to be delivered as and when he thought they would be getting stocked out. Waaaah....there is so much one can learn from such people.

Ta-ta folks !

Vanity

2005-03-23T19:01:00.000+06:00

Sometimes you read something that sparks off an idea and then you pen a few paragraphs and try to develop it into something worthwhile...20 mts down the line you know this thing is going nowhere but refusing to cut ur losses, you labor on hoping that things will pan out better...alas !! The final product is crap..Likewise this story...or..shud I say pretending to be a story...neway I have still published it simply to remind myself that I need to take a break :-( A creative check as my reviewers tell me...If you still insist on reading on, be my guest !!
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I just love these tie breaks. Whoever introduced them must have been a sheer genius. When you're pushing 27 with tired legs that just won't take any more, the last thing you want to do is be involved in a slug fest at 41 degrees centigrade on a hot summer afternoon with an opponent who was not yet born when you first watched Boris win Wimbledon at Centre Court. These kids of today - they sure can hit a ball hard !! Seated on my chair and sipping the cool orange juice, I glance at the manual score board towards the far end of the court.

x-1 Jules Lobo 1 7 6
Mahesh Vaidyanathan 6 5 6

I silently wish that the injury time-out I have taken be extended for another couple of minutes but then, I also want this to end soon.

"Go Jules Go..Kick the bugger's ass"

There is a sudden buzz in the crowd after the heckler's call but all I can hear are muted murmurs of approval. Not a single voice to shout back in my support. An understandable reaction from the younger section of the crowd, mostly college going girls, who knew very little of tennis except that Jules Lobo was a Greek God worthy of worship but surely the elders knew better. The price one pays for being the bad boy of tennis.

"So did you hit a few balls today morning ?"
"No"
"Are you serious ? Absolutely no preparations ?"
"None if you exclude the one hour of lazing at the pool"
"You don't want to win ?"
"As if practicing will help.."
"Don't be a cynic"
"8 years on the tour, 16 hour work days and what do I have to show for all this in my trophy cabinet ? Nothing"
"It just means you need to practice harder"
"Not the way I see it"
"Forget it. I've been watching Lobo all week ever since the draw was up. Here are some interesting statistics."
"I don't wanna know"
"Lets talk about his biggest strength first. His first serve percentages were in the early 70s in the first couple of rounds but in the last two matches it is down to 52%. Ace count so far is only 10 per match which is well below his career record. He has served 28 double faults in the four rounds so far but 16 of them in the last match. His forehand is big - he hits 15 winners on that side on an average per match - but his backhand is very brittle. His return of serve on the deuce court is better than the one in the ad side. He has good instinct and can handle fiery serves but he seems to be having a problem with high kicking serves on his backhand"
"Enough...Are you done ?"
"No. Here's the most important part. He is a man of momentum. When he's down, finish him off. You give him a sniff, he'll make you pay. He is a darling of the crowds and will use that to the hilt. For a kid of 17, he has amazing nerves of steel and will not be rattled by your tantrums"
"Hmmm"
"All the best. And btw, Haroon has pulled out which means Shashank is already through to the finals"
"Thanks. I surely could have done without that extra piece of information. You know my dismal record against him"

If only I had paid heed to her words. If only I had not gone for that ultra safe second serve at 5-2: Deuce. If only I had slowed down the pace of my shots and mixed it up more. 20 minutes of madness had absolutely changed the complexion of the match. All that ranting and raving and questioning line calls and throwing the racket had won me nothing besides alienating the crowd. So here I am still on court when I could have been relaxing under a cool shower. Damn.

Time

I walk slowly towards the baseline and prepare to receive. The ballboy raises his arm and throws a couple in my direction. I am bewildered and realise a little late that I start off first at the deuce court. I practice my serve motion by tossing the ball up to check to see if the sun is against my eyes. No. It is not. I stare across the net. Jules is ready. I decide to go wide.

TASH TISH

Good wide serve on Jules' forehand - he'd lunged in despair to reach it but cudn't put enough to get the ball back over the net. A service winner.

1-0 Mahesh

I walk over to the ad court and try to steal a glance towards my opponent. He seems totally in control. I remind myself that I am more experienced and the pressure is bound to get to Jules as long as I can keep my nose in front. Jules gets ready to serve.

TASH

Before I could react, the ball had whizzed past me and it was an ace down the centre - he must have served more than 20 such untouchables.

1-1 Jules

The chair umpire is trying to control the deafening applause but I have already moved on to play the next point. It is the Deuce Court. My favorite side. If only I could get the ball back and make him play more shots. Jules prepares to serve. For a fleeting moment I think I can see his eyes peering towards my right. Maybe he is thinking of serving wide but at this distance I am not sure. I guess I will take a chance and if he indeed does go that way, then I will have a swing at it.

TASH

Yet another ace down the centre and I had moved hopelessly in the other direction.

2-1 Jules

The clapping and hooting has still not subsided. I pick up the racket I had slammed down and swear to never trust my instinct again. I remind myself that he can't keep serving so well and that my chance will come. Till then I just have to take care of my own serve. Its the ad court now and I remember the advice I'd received before the match. Maybe its time to try it out.

TASH TASH TISH

A good kicking serve to the backhand had prompted a high return which had presented me with an easy forehand volley to put away.

2-2 Mahesh

The muted applause does not distract me as I concentrate on the fact that Jules had not even bothered to chase the last ball down. Maybe I should charge to the net more often. Its the deuce court and I contemplate going wide again. But then, the previous point has clearly shown that Jules' backhand is showing signs of falling apart.

TASH TASH.....OUT

I had gone straight down the centre to his backhand but Jules, guessing right, had just stabbed at the serve with the intention of passing me down the line. Diving at the net out of sheer desperation, I'd watched the ball fly past and miss the sidelines just by a fraction of an inch.

3-2 Mahesh

...Oooooh...The murmurs from the crowd over the last point continue to fly from every corner but Jules seems more preoccupied in selecting the balls for the next point. I pump myself up hoping for the first serve to falter and give me an opening.

TASH...Fault....

There it is.. Finally I get a look in at his second serve. I step in a couple of inches clearly signaling my intention to go for the kill. Jules grimaces.

TASH TASH TUCK

It had been a good kicking serve on the forehand side but I'd been prepared for it. Surprisingly he had chosen to come in on the second serve and my angled return had fallen sharply at his feet. Managing to wriggle out a low volley, the ball had kissed the net and agonisingly dropped on my side of the court.

3-3 Jules

...The loud cheering is still on...Damn my luck. Time to change ends. I walk slowly towards the other side. More whistles and cat calls from the crowd urging Jules to finish me off. I am tired. Its deuce court again. Last time it was down the centre. I am sure he will go wide now but should I move in advance. I decide to wait and see.

TASH

Another ace. And this time it had been wide, well wide. I had been rooted at my spot, unable to decide on which side to move.

4-3 Jules

Loud roars of delight. For the first time in this set, Jules looks to be closing in on victory. The first pangs of anger set in within me but I quickly dismiss them away. After all, its still going with serve and I know its all a battle of wits. Its the ad court and I decide on a huge serve down the centre.

TASH TASH

Another lucky break. Jules guessed right again and had a mighty swing at the ball but the return just caught the tape. Another service winner.

4-4 Mahesh

There is absolute silence in the stadium but the adrenalin within me is pumping and I can sense that if I win this next point, I can put some serious pressure on Jules. I decide to gamble by going wide again to his forehand.

TASH TASH

A return winner from the corner that I could only watch with resignation land at the left corner of the court inches inside the sideline.

5-4 Jules

The crazy girls who had erupted wildly, rising as one to cheer their man on, are finally back on their seats. The momentum is now firmly with Jules. I have to go for broke. Jules unties his laces and reties them. He chooses the balls carefully and prepares to play the biggest two points of his tournament so far.

TASH TISH SMASH

A good heavy serve down the line had forced me into a defensive lob which Jules put away into the crowd with the practiced swagger of a born showman.

6-4 Jules

The crowd is still delirious with joy as I walk slowly towards the deuce court. It is now or never - I have to take that risk. Jules casts a quick glance towards my forehand side but this time I will not be fooled.

TASH TUSH

Following a huge serve down the line, Jules had rushed towards the net only to be totally caught unaware by a defensive return lob that had sailed over his towering figure to land right at the back of the court centimetres short of the baseline.

6-5 Jules

The crowd is stunned by the audacity of my shot selection and can sense that something dramatic is about to happen. I know I have been given a lifeline but I can sense that I am tiring too. Drawing on my reserves, I realise I need to go on as I really want to win this one badly, if not for myself for someone watching it on TV at home. Its the ad court and I think for a moment of kicking one up to Jules' backhand.

TASH

...and then it happened...

I slammed one down the line and Jules, who had instinctively moved away from the centre to cover his weak backhand, watched in horror as the ball lined up in his favorite side. It was an unfortunate ace...except that someone had dropped one of the balls by mistake and it had strayed down to where Jules had been standing. Of course, the sound behind him might have momentarily disturbed his concentration but everyone could see that it would have, in no way, affected the outcome of the point. The umpire seemed to concur and had awarded the point against him.

6-6 Mahesh

Jules, however, can see the match slipping away from his grasp and refuses to accept the chair umpire's ruling. I use this break to give myself some rest and watch as more drama unfolds. He argues for a couple of minutes and hurls abuses at the embarassed ballgirl. He is promptly served a warning and the crowd is now booing and baying for his blood. Undeterred by their sudden hostility, he refuses to budge and instead demands that the match referee be called. The arguments get a little more heated and Jules, who has by now completely lost his cool, protests by going to his chair and refusing to continue. I have had enough of this whole fracas and realise its time to take control. I walk towards the chair umpire and say

"I offer to replay the point":"What ?""Let's just replay the point"
"LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, We'll replay the point."

As I walk back, the crowd who've just realised the magnitude of my incredible gesture are up on their feet giving me a hero's welcome.

6-5 Jules

I look across the net and can see Jules is perspiring. Clearly the whole incident has shaken him badly. I decide to go to his backhand.

TASH

The ball had hit the net and it was now a second serve on match point.

"Go Mahesh Go..Kick the bugger's ass"

Its the same heckler. How things can change in 15 minutes. I weigh the options. I could go for a safe kicking serve on his backhand or I could go for one aimed at his body. Either way I would have to fight for the point..Or maybe I could just....

TASH

The ball had hit the net again and it was a double fault.

Game, Set and Match - Jules Lobo 1-6 7-5 7-6

I walk dejectedly towards the net and congratulate Jules. He doesnt speak much and waits for me to shake first with the chair umpire. There is pin drop silence in the crowd. Everybody is in a trance. No one can believe that I just blew it. And then all of a sudden, the crowd breaks into raptures. As I pack up, a mike is thrust before me and history is made as I become the first loser in a semifinals to have an interview done on court.

"What were your thoughts when you went for that huge second serve at match point ?"
"It was just another point so I backed myself to come good with that serve"
"In hindsight, what do you think of your offer to replay that last point when the rules and the umpire were on your side"
"Its just a sport. I didn't lose a war. Given a chance, I'd do that all over again"
"So where do you go from here ?"
"I know you are talking of my bad boy reputation Vijay, but thanks for asking coz I happen to have some news to break. I just played my last match today. I'm retiring..If you'll excuse me now, I am tired"

The crowd cannot believe what they just heard and before they can react, I silently make my way out.

"Hello"
"Hello Aunty... Its me... Is Priya around ?"
"Yeah.. but she is in a very foul mood Mahesh.. Be careful...Pri, Mahesh is on the line..Don't sulk...Talk to him"
"Hi chittu"
"Hmmm"
"Hey, this isn't exactly the most cheerful start to a telephonic conversation"
"Whatever"
"What's bothering you ?"
"Damnitt..Don't act dumb. Why the hell did you throw the match away ?"
"I didn't .. I jes went by gut and it let me down"
"Bullshit...and what in the name of God was all that fucking crap you spoke on TV"
"You didn't like that interview ?"
"C'mon sweetheart, I know you better than that..."
"Priya Priya.."
"The devil suddenly becoming a saint..You might have fooled the world but not me..."
"Well..I've been thinking of calling it quits for a long time now.."
"Cut to the chase.. we all know this part of the story"
"...and I wasn't exactly taking the tennis world by storm"
"Go on.."
"And the replay was a god-given opportunity to redeem my reputation and mark my own small place in tennis history.."
"Go on.."
"People loves good stories...All legends are made of small incidents..Nobody remembers Jana Novotna for the one Wimbledon she finally won.. Isn't she remembered more for those wonderful scenes of crying on the Duchess of Kent's shoulders..."
"*giggle*You devious piece of shit.."
"..and trust me, Goran would have been a greater hero if only he had never won Wimbledon..."
"You are impossible.."
"...and what do you think about Bradman...99.94 ?"
"No.. the last ball duck..I am getting it..."
"Good honey good.. you catch on fast....and anyway I wouldn't have bet money on myself for the finals"
"Hahaha...so what next ?"
"Just wait and see...Reading tomorrow's newspapers is gonna be fun..I can already imagine the headlines.."

Journeyman Pro shows the sporting world its still a gentleman's game

Hyderabad Open: Jules wins match, Mahesh wins hearts - Sportsmanship lives on !

A movie roundup

2005-03-22T18:01:00.000+06:00

Its finally back...The thriller genre in Kollywood has arrived, albeit a little late.. but definitely with a bang !!!!! Ameer, the man behind that 'vithyasamaana love story' Mounam Pesiyaadhey, has delivered yet another genuinely 'different' film...and rasigargal like me who had long given up hope that quality movies like Sigappu Rojakkal and Tik Tik Tik (don't even get me into arguments about movies like Manmadhan) will be made again have now a reason to rejoice...At a time when every 'successful' movie seems to be a rehash of the same old formula (Yes, I AM toking of Vijay films and I am sure Sachin will be A1 +B3 +C2 +....), Raam is definitely a whiff of fresh air !!

So what is it that endeared me to Raam. Well, to be perfectly honest, if I were to sum up the storyline in a paragraph, it definitely would not make interesting reading. But then its in the screenplay that Ameer has invested a lot of attention and the results speak for themselves. Full marks to the director for adopting a shifty (interesting though not necessarily novel) approach to story-telling by switching back and forth time to move the plot in the first half. The meticulous detail in characterisation - point in case being the small quirks of some of the fringe characters like the jockey, the saamiyaar/guru and the cops in the local police station - goes a long way in building credibility for each and every character and the reason for his / her behavior under the circumstances. The dialogues are rapier sharp, conveying what they need to with minimal effort and maximum impact.

Ably supporting Ameer is his wonderful technical crew. The hilly terrains of Kodaikanal so brilliantly canned by the camera of Ramji (watch out also for the lighting in every frame) elevates many a scene to dizzy heights....and when that is not in play, the alternatively invigorating and mellow background score of Yuvan ensures that the tempo of the movie is maintained throughout. Almost all the songs are lilting melodies and special mention must be made of Yaaro Arivaal which aims straight for the gut (I could probably compare it with that mottai number in Sethu)

Performance wise, there is not a single actor in the movie who puts a foot wrong. Of all the sons with a filmi background, save Surya, I've always maintained that Jeeva was the one with the most talent (even after his insipid Thithikudhey..and considering competition like Dhanusssss, Simbu, Manoj, Sibiraj, Arun Vijaykumar...) and Raam has just proved me right. It would be no exaggeration to say that Raam is clearly his show. Other noteworthy performances include Saranya playing Jeeva's mother (I am ok as long as its neone but that horrible Nadia Moideen) with a perpetual frown on her face and that wonderful Malayalam actor Murali who plays a local tough cop. The real surprise package though is Rahman (of Pudhu Pudhu Arthangal fame) who comes up with a sterling performance as the Sub Inspector digging to get to the truth.

You might probably be wondering why I have not spoken even a word about the actual story but then to review any movie belonging to this genre without giving away the plot details is a difficult task. Let me just say that Raam has enough twists and turns to keep one engaged in the first 90 minutes. Of course, the movie has its own share of flaws and critics have been quick to point out that the revelation is anticlimactic and tame and that the last 20 minutes are a real drag, especially since the suspense is revealed a good couple of reels before the end. Of course, they are right to an extent but I guess the director had by then boxed himself into a corner and any other approach to wriggle out would have come out even worse. There is a also a school of thought that is of the opinion than any thriller should have a smart twist in the end, leaving the viewer gasping for breath, but I definitely do not belong to this tribe. I firmly believe there could be simple yet interesting explanations for, what appears on the face of it, a complicated question (remember Mystic River, Village) and Raam, intentionally or otherwise, works reasonably well on this front.

In short, an effort worthy of praise !! Keep up the good work, Ameer !!
(4 out of 5)

Since I do not have time to write in detail about some of the other movies that I've seen over the last couple of weeks, here are my recommendations.

Meet the Fockers - 2/5
Constantine - I refuse to rate
Ayya (Tamil) - 2/5
Mayaavi - 3.5/5
Be Cool - 2.5/5

Coming soon
Tango Charlie
Amu
Achuvinte Amma
Udayananu Tharam
Mahanadigan
House of Flying Daggers

The Great North Indian Tour...

2005-03-21T13:21:00.000+06:00

To view the Best of the Great North Indian Tour, check them out here

A Quiver Full of Arrows

2005-03-18T16:55:00.000+06:00

Curious Incident of the Phone in the Night-time

If you were under the impression that MSM is responsible for most of life's problems, then you are mistaken. I just realised today that AIM can be equally dangerous too. Now blogs come under the latter category and the more popular ones in India, I have observed, have the power to shape public opinion and behavior. Take the case of that notoriously celebrated blogger who uploaded the 'in'famous Trisha video at his site and was almost sued for libel..and then, refusing to learn from past mistakes, he went one step further by also giving a lot of unecessary publicity to that poor Billion Dollar Company's prankster on the bench. You guys know what I am talking about, right !! Now, why all this you may ask !! Wait... lemme say it my way...Regular readers of this blog are well aware of my unabashed admiration, bordering on worship, for a prolific blogger who is very famous for his life-enhancing mushy (YEAH, I am, saying that) short stories...Hehehehe..that sounded so corny...It now appears as if a lot of ppl have taken to enacting some of the scenes from those classics in real life...

On Tuesday night or Wednesday morning, as this happened from 11:59:54 pm to 12:00:05 am (wot awesome timing), I got my first anonymous fan calling in from god-knows-where. If there is one thing I absolutely cannot tolerate, then it is my mobile phone ringing after I have hit the sack. I've tried keeping it in silent mode but quite often this has had disastrous effects since I forget to put it back in General mode and end up missing a lot of calls and realising it very late...I digressed again, didn't I ? :-( Neway I got this crazy fone call at 11:59:54 on Tuesday night and when I finally picked it up after trying to ignore it for around 4 rings, there was a sweet female voice at the other end of the line. Wait...Don't scoff at that...I swear I'm not fibbing...It was all too good to be true and at that moment, I didn't believe it myself. And then this voice at the other end wished me Happy Birthday. When I look back now, there could have been a million possible responses but any guesses on what I did. Yes. I just said "Thanks" and hung up...But then you might say, Wednesday isn't my Birthday right...Of course, this is where Jupe is smart. The last thing he wanted to do was correct that sweet thing and ensure that he is disturbed again the following night... Smart move nuh ?? (pat on Jupe's back) Neway the next morning when I was up and awake, the first thing I did was to check my mobile for the no. It looked like a Reliance number which meant I did not stand much of a chance of finding out who it could have been unless I called back... which I could not coz of Jupe's principle no: 5 of mobile fone etiquette..Never return calls from strangers. But then there is also this thing called curiosity...So finally got a friend of mine to call the no: but I guess the chick was smarter than I imagined. The fone was not reachable or sthg like that...Neway I am pretty sure its someone from the immediate past since I was clearly adressed as Jupe so here's a big THANKOO from Jupe to this secret admirer ;-)

Embarassment of the Nth order

You wake up as late as possible, you do your daily chores, you try to act as if everything is normal hoping that your folks will understand that you are too old to celebrate the occassion but naaah....that just didn't happen... Well...what exactly happened on Thursday was that I had to wear the new dress (MN, you better start practicing fast sprints coz I'm gonna kill ya when I meet ya...the damn shirt didn't have a pocket and the orange was way too bright), do the namaskaram and accept the money (which isn't all that bad) and...here comes the sheeeeeeeesh part....actually cut a cake :-( Twas a good rich one too...Those 3 huge slices must have set my fitness regimen back by a month :-(

What is usually the most enjoyable part of the day are the numerous fone calls and the pampering & attention (atleast I am honest enough to accept it) that I get from 'the makkal' but this time the day happened to co-incide with our annual technical symposium and so everytime I got a fone call, I had to escape from the crowd and take it in private. Another embarassing / annoying thing was the endless stream of wishes coming in from total strangers greeting everyone in my workplace who celebrated their B'days on that day (there is a tool in our intranet which lets you send emails to this lot) - at last count, I think we got something like 32 such mails. Ufffffff.

..and of course, there is this kiddish lot who sent e-cards with rude messages about one getting older and blah blah blah...When will these pigs (hehehe) realise that unlike a lot of ppl I know, I actually enjoy growing older :-p So please save all this crap for someone else.. It gets so embarassing to open these e-cards (not to mention the accompanying music) and read such juvenile stuff ;-)

Smile time

Yes..almost everyone I expected called and wished...atleast the ones that matter most...and I really appreciate those two loooooooong distance calls and that one looooooooooong call...Did I forget to mention my two machaans who, even on this day, gave a missed call and expected me to call back...If only you guys had behaved otherwise, I would have hated the world for changing...Sometimes status quo rocks...

Lunatics Unleashed

Though my really close buddies know that I hate sentimental gifts (why 'thin flimsy paper with Gandhi on one side' as an option eludes their pea brains continues to baffle me..Hint Hint) the more creative in this motley lot always spring a surprise or two with their whacky stunts...This year the bar has been raised really high...I got this really cute mail which reads something like this...

This is a PRE-PAID Voucher that entitles the bearer to 2 Days and 1 night of 'Comforts Unlimited' (???) at {some address in Sona Gachchi}. Kindly redeem by Jan 1st 2006.

Please note:
1. Reserve a week in advance.
2. In case of last minute cancellations, there will be no refund.
3. Baggage and Belongings are at your own risk during the stay.

..and yes, please remember to fill the feedback form at the end of your stay. This will entitle you to a 20% discount during your second visit. After all, Customer Delight is a thing of the past. Its the time for Customer Orgasm ;-)

Well..what do I say ? Funny... very very funny... but where the hell are my travel tickets ? And remember, nothing less than 2nd a/c ;-)

Disappointments

There had to be some, right...I jes remember that one dear pal didn't call......who it now looks like is well and truly happily married...Maybe I should re-read that article which appeared in the TOI sometime back..."Losing your best friend to a romantic partner" :-p

Yeah, it would have been good to round off the day by winning Dumb C at the culturals but then I can only remember the thathuva paadal "Ninaipadhellam Nadandhuvittaal..." ;-) Btw, we came 3rd and missed the second prize coz we were 3 Marketing people in the team and there was a round where we had to mime 'Cyclic Redundancy Code' - WTF !!!

OK OK. We've come to the end of this post and I know you are still itchng to know what MSM and AIM are. Of course, I was flaunting. I just learnt these two acronyms from a new blog. MSM is MainStream Media and AIM is Alternate or Independent Media. hehehehhee..Sorry huh...kya karein, aisa hi hoon main ;-)