The damned pickup line & Some Random PJs

Jesus H Christ, how on earth does one distinguish between a male lizard and a female one ? Or better still, has anyone even bothered to look that 'deep' ? Apparently Dave Barry has... and thanks to him, we have this absolutely rollicking post here. Could relate to every single word. Ensoii !!

This seems to be the week of my cousins. Here's another set of PJs (stuff worse than my roomie Kerry's collection) live from Hyderabad. Thanks Vardini - once in a while these jokes really act as a stress reliever :-)

Question: An elephant was in love with ashe-elephant. But the she-elephant went and got married to some other elephant. So our elephant was very Depressed.One of his friends felt sorry for him, and took himto a park to cheer him up. In the park, they sat on a see-saw, but the see-saw broke. Now, which song would our hero sing?
Ans: "See-saw ho ya dil ho, aakhir toot jaata hai."

Question: In an elephant school, some loafer elephants were hanging around in the canteen. A sexy female elephant passes by. What do the loafer elephants say about her?
Ans: Look yaar, 36000 - 24000 - 36000!!

Question: Two hairs on a bald man's head fall inlove with each other and want to get married, but cannot.Why?
Ans: Because under Indian laws, "baal vivaah" is illegal.

Question: One fine morning, Ravan felt guilty for all his bad deeds. He felt that he should go an apologise to Ram for all the problems he had caused. So he went to Ram's house and knocked on the door. Ram opened the door and was surprised to find Ravan standing there. Ravan just kept staring andthinking but didn't say a word. What was he thinking?
Ans: "Kis mooh se maafi maangoon?"

Question: Luv and Kush are going to a village andpass by a well. Luv falls into the well. Why?
Ans: Because Luv is blind.

Question: Now, Kush also jumps in. Why?
Ans: Because Luv ke liye saala Kush bhi karega!

A railway station beggar meets another beggar.A software engineer meets another software engineer.Both of them ask the same question to each other.What is the question?
"So, which platform are you working on?"

Question: What do you call a person who is leavingIndia?
Ans: Hindustan Lever.

Question: What do you call a person who leaves India but doesn't travel much?
Ans: Hindustan Lever Limited.

Question: Who is Joe?
Ans: Kambakth ishq... Because "Kambakth ishq hai Joe!"

Gattu ek lecture attend karta hai. lecture ke baad use bhookh lagti hai. so he goes to the canteen.canteen mein gattu ek pav leta hai. jaise hi woh pavkhane ke liye uthata hai to dekhta hai ki uski plate mein"jannat" likha hai. To janaab ab aapko yeh batana hai ki gattu jiska lecture attend karke aa raha hai, us proffessor ka naam kya hai???

Ishq Ki Chhaon.

Jinke "Sir" ho "Ishq ki Chhaon"
"Pav" ke neeche "Jannat" hogi....

Don't scratch ur head this is a song from film"Dil Se" :-)