I did it. I won my first serious battle at home. Nopes - am in no way referring to the usual "Why don't you cut down on your sleep and start exercising ?" or "When do you plan to settle down ?" arguments. My folks are chill. I am talking of this BIG FIGHT between me and the cockroaches. These pests have been bugging me for over a month now and much as I’ve tried to keep my house clean, they keep popping up from nowhere. Taking my mom's advice, I tried that magic chalk powder but the ones in Bangalore seem to be wiser than the average Joe. HIT and other repellants had also failed. So cometh the hour, cometh the man. Tuesday night, broom in hand, I attacked them. Guerilla warfare. I hid behind doors (assuming they can see me) and surprised them. My, my, did they retaliate. They ran like crazy. What happened next..
Commercial break ke baad
Trivia 1 for the day: Cockroaches are among the fastest running insects, capable of 50 body lengths per second, which is equivalent to a human running the 100 yard dash in 1 second.
Shah Rukh Khan, with a silly grin on his face and a sporty Nike shoe in hand, hams "Haaaaan..If you wanna run faster than these cockroaches, use NIKE. Just do it."
(Commercial break over)
Silly ol' me had forgotten to close the doors. Needless to say they started escaping to other rooms and I had great trouble restricting their movement. Hurrying behind them and taking pot-shots once in a while, I soon claimed 3 victims. But there were atleast 5-6 left. Next weapon to be used was the bucket. Standing a good 2 feet away from them, I threw a bucket on a couple of 'em the intention being to closet them within that and suffocate them by cutting off their oxygen supply after 3 minutes. 3 minutes ke baad, when I opened the bucket, Lo....what happened next
Last commercial break ke baad
Trivia 2 for the day: Cockroaches can survive even nuclear attacks.
Amitabh Bachchan, with his deep baritone voice, says " Wanna eradicate cockroaches. Send them to watch Kabhi Khushi Kabhi Ghum. Bol diya tho bol diya"
(Commercial break over)
The damn things almost flew at me. Okie, maybe I am exaggerating but they sure took off towards me. Screaming and stomping my foot on them at the same time, I managed to get two more. Bravo Jupe ! Now all that was left was the final assault. Summoning up all my courage, having a small flash back about the numerous instances in the past when they had embarrassed me in front of visitors with their pesky presence, I had one last hugeeee swipe at them. N yessssss, I got them all. Mission accomplished.
As I look back now at those 15 minutes of irrefutable valor, my chest swells with pride. I've finally discovered that lion within me.
PS: This piece is dedicated to someone special as she starts what is probably the most crucial phase of her life today. So here's truckloads of best wishes and prayers for her success. (A peck in the cheek..SLAP....Ooops..sorry)
PPS: I was kinda considering writing a piece on the hottest chick I’ve met but I have postponed that for Monday :-)